Imitation is the Sincerest Form of Flattery
by DevinTowerwood
Summary: "I love Stainy. I love Izuku and Ochaco, too! And I wanna become everyone that I love." He was a boy, she was a girl. And she was a genderqueer shapeshifter, and she a girl kinda but also a frog kinda. Can I make it anymore obvious? OR: Himiko Toga has a terrible idea and it turns out better than she could have imagined. [Happy Ending, Polyamory, Pining, Realizing You're Queer]
1. Grin

**Summary: **Ochaco asks Izuku out on a date. Simple, right?

* * *

_Knock, knock, knock._

After a few seconds of rustling from behind the door, Izuku stood in the doorway, eyes quickly going wide.

"Oh! Hey Ochaco! Sorry, I thought it'd be Iida."

She just stood there for a moment with a bright smile on her face.

That seemed to make him a little nervous, and he chuckled. Not the cute kind, but the anxious kind.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Well, I was planning on going to the mall this Saturday with Tsuyu, but it looks like she's going to be busy with something."

"Oh, that's too bad," he said, visibly relaxing and visibly missing the subtext. "What about the other girls? You're not going to have to cancel, are you?"

_Would I even if they weren't?!_

"Oh, um, I'm not totally sure," she said. "I was actually, kinda . . ."

A blush rose to her cheeks, one hand rising to block some of her face as if that would hide her own nervous smile.

" . . . hoping you'd like to **go with me**?"

He cocked his head to the side, that empty-headed, good-willed look settling in. "Sure thing. I wouldn't want you to go and be lonely, I guess. Should I invite Iida or-"

"No!" she cut in, perhaps a little too desperately.

At least, definitely desperate enough that it caught him off guard, and the wide-eyed empty-headed look became more exaggerated as he struggled to continue missing the subtext.

"Oh, okay," he said."

This time it was her turn to give a nervous chuckle, but once it abated, she was able to drop her hand from her face. She was bright red and she knew it, but she was just going to have to eat the blow to her pride long enough to say what she came here to say.

"I was thinking more like we could go as a **date**," she said all in one breath, now her turn to have wide eyes and no thoughts in her head.

She counted the seconds in her head as he stood with a smile on his face, totally silent: _1 . . . 2 . . . 3 . . . 4 . . ._

"Oh, like a-"

"Like a go-on-a-date-with-me date." Interrupting him felt rude but she couldn't take the anticipation his own stupidity caused any longer. It was her fault for going and falling for a boy so utterly unthinking when it came to romance that she probably could keep the subtle approach up for months without him even noticing something was off.

"Oh," he said, deadpan.

Then, with comical animation and volume: "OH! LIKE A **DATE-DATE**. WITH **YOU**."

"Yes, a **date**" she said, pressing a hand to her chest, "with **me**."

"RIGHT! UM! WELL! I . . . I . . . THAT SOUNDS . . ."

His hesitation was cute, and it was also annoying. Why did he have such fierce determination except when it came to deciding whether he liked her or not?

Her expression dropped slowly. Quietly (and hoping to quiet him), she said, "It's okay if you don't want to. As friends or a date.** Whatever you want is okay**."

His voice got a lot quieter, but not much steadier: "But - but. **You** want to go on a date . . . with . . . me?"

She nodded slowly. "Yeah.

Finally his own anxiety seemed to exhaust him, and Izuku relaxed, taking a few slow breaths to compose himself. He scratched the side of his head in thought, pensive for a few seconds.

Then, with a totally disproportionate amount of determination on his face, he said, "I think I'd like that."

"Great!" she replied, suddenly bright and cheery. "Just meet me Sunday at 11am at the station near school and we can go together."

This also appeared to catch him off guard a bit, but now his eyes were doing that thing where he was trying to analyze the situation - one step before he'd start muttering to himself creepily. Adorably.

"You don't want to just . . . text me? And we could walk to the station together."

"Nope." She shook her head. "Let's meet at the station. I can surprise you better that way. It'll be fun!"

"Ah, okay!" he said, the determination fading from his face. "Yeah, that'll be fun, and I'll . . . wear something nice."

It could not be more painfully obvious from the way that he said that that he didn't own anything nice to wear, and he'd probably sneak off with Shoto or someone to the mall before the date just to get ready for the date at the mall. Like an idiot. Like a big, loveable idiot.

Her mouth started to curl, but she fought the urge.

_No. Not yet. Hold it just a little longer._

"Awesome," she said, still beaming. "Sunday at 11. **Don't forget**."

"I won't. Promise!"

"Bye, Izuku."

Hearing his first name only made him blush, which was exactly what she was hoping for.

"Oh. Bye!" He said, and closed the door.

Her mouth threatened to break into a real smile again, but still she resisted, bolting for the bathrooms. She took inside the girls' bathroom, saw no one inside, then turned around and went into the boys' bathroom. Also no one inside. Perfect. She snuck inside, safe at last.

She let her grin break, wide and wicked. She raised her hands up to the side of her face, just feeling the warmth in her cheeks. Her fingers traced down along her bottom lip, as soft as she could only imagine.

Ochaco was beautiful. So beautiful she could barely stand it. How could he even stand to look at her every day without telling her how much he loved her?

Time was running short though, and she didn't have time to sit and enjoy her face nearly as long as she would like to. She entered one of the stalls, fished a small bottle out of her pocket, and set it next to the toilet while she stripped.

She hated doing this in boys' bathrooms, but anywhere else would be too dangerous.

As soon as she was naked she could tell this form was already starting to lose its shape. She was in no mood to see her own body right now, not while she was already riding the high from Izuku's acceptance and the look of her own face. She unstoppered the bottle and swallowed the contents, the taste heavy and metallic on her tongue.

* * *

_Knock, knock, knock._

After a moment of moment of rustling on the other side of the door, Ochaco appeared in the doorway, her eyes wide with surprise. Ochaco was wearing a black tank top and jeans, and a shiver of delight passed through her. This was something new.

"Oh, hey Izuku! What do you need?" she said, smiling brightly.

And with every ounce of willpower she could muster, Toga held back her grin.


	2. Plans

**Summary: **Toga stalks Ochaco and Izukku while they're on a date at the mall. She gets a bit antsy, and decides to take Ochaco out on a date of her own - as Izuku, of course.

* * *

**Author's Notes: **Apologies from here on out with regards to the frequent switching of pronouns and names character use. There is some difficulty in adapting a Japanese text for me here that I'm trying to manage by keeping my version in line with the Japanese version - such as swapping character's names around how they are thought of, formality, and context.

As for pronouns, I'm using pronoun dissonance with regards to Toga to show the edges of where her transformed self and her self-reference meet. At the moments she is most dissonant with the person she is transformed to, I use 'she/her' pronouns. When she is aligned with their behavior, I use the pronouns appropriate to that character.

I'm hoping to convey an experience of dissociation from one's body that is a bit difficult in text, but I hope effectively communicates Toga's mental state.

Much of my treatment of this fic is experimental for me, so please bear with me as I work out the blemishes.

* * *

**Toga, December 4**, **11:15am**

Izuku and Ochaco had been rather aimlessly wandering through the mall for the past half-hour, only stopping in a boutique to window shop a few times. That was, after all, the flaw in her plan - both were under the impression they were accompanying the other to do something that was never specified. If she'd known they'd be boring about the vague nature of the date, she would have . . . probably tried to do the same thing anyway. It might be boring, but she couldn't say there was anything she'd rather be doing with her time.

Ochaco pointed out a yogurt place, really excited for the first time since they'd met at the train station, and the two of them disappeared from view.

"Tch," Toga grumbled, lowering her binoculars. The bugs she'd planted on their bags at the station had proved to be next to useless, so she wasn't getting any notable audio, either. High risk, no reward. That was how most of her plans turned out, but she rarely regretted them.

She wished she looked like someone else. A girl in an oversized hoodie was one thing, but a girl in an oversized hoodie with the hood up, binoculars, and an earpiece didn't look right anywhere. If the blood she had fridged didn't all belong to higher-profile members of the League of Villains or creepy men, she would have loved to taken a different teenager's body for a spin. If you want to do weird stuff at a mall, a high school boy can get away with just about anything. Ochaco would be nice too, but being her here presented some . . . unique difficulties.

The lovebirds re-emerged from the yogurt place, and she watched through the binoculars as Ochaco offered him a scoop of hers. He hesitated for a moment, then insisted on using his own spoon to try it - from a spot she hadn't eaten from.

_Come on, Izuku. You're on a date. Go for the indirect kiss._

Between him being a germaphobe or just afraid of being too forward, she'd definitely guess the latter. Even if it felt a little out of line with the rest of his character, she made a mental note to be more hesitant. Respectful. Touching someone to save them is one thing, but touching them in a low-stakes situation was another. Good to know. If she was ever going to have the chance to become him for more than a few minutes, it was critical that she'd do it with delicate precision. Otherwise it would just be pretend.

* * *

It was much easier to get near them without being seen on the train ride back, but the pair weren't talking much for some reason. In fact, they were doing basically nothing, not even looking at their phones. At best, they were engrossed in thought . . . or, perhaps, engrossed in a tension they were afraid to break? Between assuming they had an awkward date they wanted out of, and assuming they had a great date they were afraid to end, she aimed to be optimistic.

Was there some way to nudge them to act? No, that would interrupt them, shatter the tension. She'd need to keep a close eye on them the rest of the way back to UA to know if she was right.

After the three of them disembark at the stop near UA, the pair stay close - closer than they had been walking in the mall. _That's a good sign_, she said to herself, a smile blossoming on her face.

They still weren't talking though - not until the two of them turned a corner around a hedge about halfway between the station and UA. Ochaco stopped walking, and Toga froze, backpedaling to make sure she'd stay out of sight. The hedge's edge made a good spot to eavesdrop, so she crouched and waited.

His footsteps ended a second later, in time with Ochaco's starting, "Um."

She said, "I had fun today. Thank you."

One step closer. _That's good._

"Yeah, me too! And thank _you_."

They didn't keep walking. Clearly more was yet unsaid. _Wonderful. Thank you for doing this out in the open, Ochaco dear._

"Hey . . . do you . . ." her nervousness was palpable from here, but very endearing, ". . . really like me?"

And he said, "Yeah, I just. I didn't think you would like _me_?"

There was an audible _thud _as she chopped him, scolding. She didn't seem to notice the discrepancy of him asking her out so confidently despite thinking that, which Toga was thankful for.

"Of course I like you, Deku. How could I not?"

He stuttered nonsense for a few seconds, which made her heart sink. _Please roll with it, he's just nervous, come on._

If anything, Ochaco's tone only warmed further, turning coy. "So, what do you like about me?" she asked.

_Yeah!_

"W-well, I mean, I like your d-determination."

"My determination?" she asked, amused.

His voice steadied out. "Yeah! And you're really brave, and fun, and you're really positive! I think those are great things for a Hero, and - and great things in a person! And, um. I think you're super pretty."

Toga's heart skipped a beat, blushing deeply. This awkwardness, this jitteryness. This is what she had been missing from her picture of Izuku: Ochaco was his **first** **love**. Or, at least, the first he'd done anything about. Toga could certainly sympathize, even if hadn't ever gotten the chance to meet her **first love**. Even thinking about him too much made it hard to talk sometimes.

Ochaco laughed, but was quick to say, "It's funny. That's almost exactly the things I'd say I like about you. That, and one more thing."

There was a smile in her voice, but Toga wished she could see it.

"You're always thinking of other people. I don't just mean as a hero - you save people by being kind. And you know?, I really think that was something missing from my picture of being a hero before I met you. So, thank you."

"Oh," he replied. Not quite the reaction she was expecting.

"All Might taught me that," he continued, his voice cracking halfway through.

"Deku, are you okay?" Her voice flipped to concern so fast that, when Toga heard scraping in her ear piece, she realized he must be wiping away tears.

"I'm - I'm okay," he said, voice already returning to normal. "I was just thinking about All Might and Mirio, and all the things they've taught me. I should thank them."

They started walking again, and Toga knew emerging from the hedge line now would make her noticeable. She was forced to let them leave ear shot, and effectively give up on tailing them to UA. It was a little disappointing, but once they were far enough away, Toga walked onto the side walk and watched them through her binoculars again. Finally, they were walking hand in hand, and she absolutely glowed with delight.

As she walked back to the station, she wondered: _Which would be better: holding Ochaco's hand as Izuku, or holding Izuku's hand as Ochaco?_ And no matter how many ways she played it in her head, she couldn't decide.

* * *

Sneaking into UA was hard after they upgraded security - but not impossible. Toga had a knack for bypassing physical security, and when she was in the mood for a date a couple nights later, she ultimately had no trouble making it into the dorms. Being Izuku certainly helped - he was much more muscular than she was, not to mention the fact that he'd get no more than a slap on the wrist for wandering about after hours.

She slipped a note under Ochaco's door, asking her to come outside at 10:30pm to go on a walk with him.

And almost exactly at 10:30, she showed up outside the dorms dressed in a heavy sweatshirt.

"Hey Deku!" she called as quietly as she seemed capable of; "New sweatshirt?"

"Yeah, I've just been thrifting," he said with a smile. The truth was, she'd much prefer to be in her own sweater right now, but she'd elected to wear something more like a boy would wear, and it was a little small on his body for her liking.

She said, "Why'd you want to go on a walk so late all of a sudden?"

"I've been so busy lately with the work-study and everything," he said, abashedly scratching the back of his head, "I guess I just wanted to see you? Is that okay?"

Ochaco beamed. "Yeah! It's just kind of a new thing for me, I guess."

"Me too," he chuckled, nodding towards the path he wanted to take, and they started walking.

"So, how's your week been? I feel like we've barely seen each other." He kept his hands in his pockets for now, even if he was dying to take her hand.

She looked upwards, pressing a finger to her chin as if deep in thought. "Huh. I never thought you'd be needy."

He hung his head in shame, and started to mumble an apology, but she cut him off quickly -

"- no, no, I like it! I guess I'm just a little surprised."

There was a short lull where they just walked, aiming for one of the nature paths around campus. They were also, incidentally, the easiest point of entry for campus, and thus the only part of it Toga could say she was familiar with.

Ochaco hummed for a second, piecing together a thought. Then, "You know, ever since we started dealing with the yakuza, I've been doing a lot of weight training and martial arts stuff. I'd always thought I'd have my quirk if I ended up in a fight, and I could probably just run away, but now that I know those drugs are out there I . . . wanna get stronger." She glanced over at him, wincing, "Or just . . . not useless."

She seemed to be aiming for 'funny,' but he took that seriously. He said, "That's really admirable, Ochaco! Whenever you're afraid, you always step forward to fight your fear. I really like that about you."

It was too bad Izuku's eyes weren't good enough in the dark to see the color in Ochaco's face, but whenever she was embarrassed, she'd also stand up a bit straighter. A cute tell. _All_ of Ochaco's tells seemed to be cute.

She scratched the back of her head when feeling awkward, too, and that's what followed in a moment of quiet. Ochaco was looking into the treeline opposite from him, probably staring as far away as she could bodily manage.

She said, "It's . . . really embarrassing, but honestly?, you helped inspire that in me, from the **first** time we met."

_The __**first**__ time they met, huh?_

"Oh?"

"Yeah, um . . ." she slowly turned her head until he could just see the corner of her eye. "When you destroyed that giant robot during the entrance exam, I just thought, 'Wow, that was amazing, I want to be like that.' And I guess I haven't lost that feeling. Not even a little bit."

Toga suppressed a grin. He'd be more bashful hearing something like that, but it was hard to hide how wonderful that was to hear.

_She really does want to be just like him! Oh, Ochaco . . . I've always known._

He looked down at the path in front of them for a long moment. "I don't think you give yourself enough credit."

She finally turned to look right at him, puzzled.

"We're working to become heroes side-by-side, aren't we?" He offered out his hand as he asked.

He couldn't see if she blushed, but her hand was warm and soft, and that was at least enough to make him a little red.

They walked quietly, swinging their hands as they walked along one of the deepest nature trails within the walls of UA. It was one Toga hadn't actually seen before, but it was difficult to appreciate during the night, and the stars were no more visible from UA than they were from the industrial zone she'd been living in since the Shie Hassaikai raid.

Ochaco's the one who broke the silence. "You know . . . for a while now, I've been telling myself that if I actually saw you as my equal, I'd stop growing."

He gave her a curious look but said nothing.

She shook her head as if clearing her thoughts and continued, "Like . . . if I let myself see you as the boy I like, then I would stop seeing the goal I was striving for. To catch up. To be a strong hero."

His brow furrowed in thought, but he couldn't quite piece it together. "I don't think I understand, sorry."

She shook her head again. "I guess you don't really need to understand. Especially now."

That wasn't what he was failing to understand, though. He said, "Like . . . for me. That feeling, when you want to be just like someone, when you want to be strong like them, to have convictions like them - that _is_ **love**. And the need inside you, to protect the people you love, pushes you forward, as far as you can go. Past the limits of what you thought you could do . . ."

"Go beyond," Ochaco said, little more than a whisper. She smiled and added much louder: "Plus Ultra!"

_God I hate that._

He laughed, uncomfortable, but nodded.

"So, the way you see it - you don't just admire All Might, then. You **love** him?"

Now that was an interesting thought. Does _Izuku love All Might? As a protege, sure, but does he love him the way I love Stainy? Does he worship him? Does he really want to become him?_

It made sense, but she hadn't made that connection before. _Izuku and I are even more alike than I thought!_ She grinned at the thought.

"I guess I do."

There was another brief lull, but like the rest, there was a comfort in the quiet between them. A connection. Toga hadn't been able to feel it from afar back on the train, but this is what it must have been like for them. No need for constant words, just . . . companionship.

Once again, Ochaco broke the silence. "And you . . . want to be more like _me_?"

He stopped in his tracks, by necessity stopping Ochaco as well. She looked at him with the same puzzled expression as before, although concern filled it when he didn't immediately say anything.

She had no idea what he would say to that. All she had was what _she_ wanted to say.

"Ochaco . . . if I could be just like you, I think I might be truly happy."

It was a big slip-up in being him, and she immediately felt stupid for saying it. The only thing that kept her from staring at the ground and berating herself for it was the way Ochaco's eyes glistened, staring straight into her own.

"Oh, Izuku . . ."

She took a step forward, placing her free hand on his chest. She was so close it made her heart race - ever since they fought in the woods that night, Toga had missed the feeling of Ochaco's body on hers. Now that she was Izuku, that craving was all the more potent. He had a body that wanted to be touched. He doesn't shrink away. He can look her in the eye.

She was so close. The way her lips parted just slightly made Toga feel dizzy, an endless loop of wonder asking _What does she taste like?_

She started to lean in, their eyes both fluttering closed, until she could feel even their eyelashes touch.

But she hesitated. She asked, ". . . is this . . . our **first** kiss?"

Ochaco's eyes opened just slightly. "It can be," she whispered, and a shudder ran through Toga's whole body, the words themselves like a caress.

Every part of his body was screaming for him to pull Ochaco closer, to kiss her, to tell her how much he loves her and has always loved her. But if he does that - if _she_ does that - then that would be stealing his first kiss with her. Stealing her kiss using him, not _being_ him. Ochaco couldn't know that those words weren't his, but she also couldn't know who it was she was kissing.

Ochaco clearly sensed his hesitation and leaned back. "I'm sorry. I thought you wanted to, too."

He shook his head. "I . . . do. So much, but I - I can't right now. I'm sorry."

_Dammit._ She looked humiliated, quickly scratching the back of her neck in the awkwardness, no longer looking at him.

"No, that's okay," she said. "I get it."

_No, no, no! No!_ _You very clearly don't get it, please! Just . . ._

He shook his head, "No, no, please. Later, I . . . really do want to. Okay?"

Her confusion was obvious, but she still nodded. "I guess we should get back . . ." she said, looking back up the trail.

"Yeah."

It was a little after midnight, but seeing as she was a boy right now, Toga thought it'd be a wonderful opportunity to walk to a station further away from UA. No one bothered him, and a few extra minutes of fresh air was just the refreshment she needed after week hiding in condemned warehouses and underground lairs.

Tomorrow, she would return as Ochaco, and she'd have a date with Izuku. She was out of his blood, so she was going to have to figure out a method to collect more soon, or else her plans were going to fall apart halfway through. This was the last chunk of real free time she would be having for a while - she didn't want to waste it.

* * *

**Ochaco, December 9, 12:10am**

Something was off about Deku. Back in her room with the light on, she stared at the note he slipped under her door. She hadn't noticed when she first read it, but the longer she looked at it, the more the handwriting looked wrong. In his notebooks, his script was always cleaner, with bigger characters. It _could_ just be the result of using papers without lines, but that wasn't the only thing that felt off. Deku didn't go 'thrifting.' His mom bought his clothes for him, and he'd take the train to go see her and pick them up.

Both of these things she would have continued to ignore . . . if it weren't for the smell. He smelled like body spray, which was the same as usual, but when they nearly kissed, there was something in his breath that wasn't right. Something she didn't associate with body smells, which was why it had taken her so long to remember what it was.

It was the scent of copper.


	3. Trap

**Summary: **Midoriya shows up a few minutes late to the walk Uraraka invited him to. After launching their trap, the two of them interrogate the girl who has been stalking them for months. Uraraka runs to get a teacher to keep the villain contained until police arrive.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** There's a lot of instances here where the text should clearly be making use of honorifics (especially "-chan" and "-sensei"), but you're just going to have to slot those in mentally because I am _not_ going to listen to every line with a name it in my head to figure out which to use.

* = Actually in English

* * *

**Izuku, December 9, 10:37**

Midoriya arrived outside the dorms to find Uraraka waiting for him at the base of the steps, fingers laced behind her back.

She turned at the sound of his footsteps, waved, and greeted him with a "Deku! Glad you could make it."

"Of course." He didn't even pause, such that she had to skip at first to catch his stride and walk alongside him.

"How about we walk along the nature trails?" he asked, pointing towards one along the west of campus.

"Sounds good to me!"

He didn't have anything more to add after that, so the two of them walked briskly, quiet except for the crunch of grass then gravel.

Apparently she couldn't take the silence for long though. "How's your week been?"

He shrugged, keeping his hands in his sweatshirt pockets. "Oh, you know. Work-studying. Regular studying. Not much." He hoped none of his nervousness was showing - if it was, she certainly didn't seem to be taking notice.

"Yeah, pretty much same for me. I've been doing a lot of weight training though. Gotta be able to protect myself in case . . ."

She trailed off. At first he thought it was just hesitation, but once it was clear she wasn't going to continue, he prompted, "In case what?"

She shrugged, but answered anyway: "Like. I get shot with one of those quirk-destroying bullets."

_Oh._ That definitely wasn't what he was expecting - such a heavy concern right out of the gate.

His brow furrowed, obviously concerned. "I think that's a great attitude, but . . . if you lose your **quirk**, it's probably best not to** fight**. Not unless you have to."

She wasn't deterred - but definitely annoyed. "Well, I might have to. You can't always rely on your **quirk** in a **fight**. You of all people know that."

_Fair. I guess._

"I . . . guess you're right."

He only glanced at her, but that was enough for his worry to grow. "I guess I just get worried about you **fighting**, you know?"

Wrong thing to say. She crossed her arms over her chest and looked like she was gritting her teeth in frustration. The immediate feedback of obviously saying the wrong thing.

She said, "I'm a Hero too, Deku."

He wasn't expecting to feel this guilty this fast, but she _had_ a point.

He nodded. "You're right. Sorry."

The pause that followed was awkward and tense, but it didn't last very long. She was back to her more relaxed, warm tone when she started talking again.

"You know, it's really embarrassing, but I've really looked up to you since the first time we met."

He looked at her, confusion written all over his face, but if she noticed, she didn't show it. She just kept talking:

"When you were afraid, and still figuring out your **quirk**, you still stepped forward and rescued me. It made me want to be just like you. Brave like you."

He paused there in the middle of the dirt path, as if truly struck by what she just said. It was hard not to duck his head in embarrassment, but he forced on a small smile and said, "Thanks, Uraraka."

His eyes shifted to the space just behind her as if searching for something. He took a big step to the side, drawing a silent look of confusion from her.

He said, "And, um, I'm sorry about this."

"What are-"

Before she could finish her question, he grabbed her shoulders and shoved as hard as he could. She only stumbled back a few steps, but that was all it took to trigger the trap; the net closed in around her as she was foisted about ten feet up in the air.

She just blinked for a second, looking at the ropes ensnaring her and the trees around her, but didn't scream or otherwise panic. It wasn't until her double stepped out from behind the tree she was now anchored to that a look of realization came across her face.

"Well, fuck*," she grumbled, posture immediately deteriorating until she was just slumped over inside the net.

"You okay?" he called.

She was sulking and not looking at him. "You knew it was me the whole time, didn't you?"

Uraraka glared up at the girl in the net, arms crossed over her chest. She was wearing the same heavy sweater she'd been wearing for most of the early winter - and definitely not anything so boyish as the other one was wearing.

She said, "I realized something was wrong last night and asked Deku if he remembered our walk last night. And he said no - and he guessed it was you! You're not so sneaky as you think."

Midoriya and Uraraka met a little to the side of the net trap, but both were keeping their eyes up.

"So, where'd you get the _net?_ I have to admit, I'm . . . a little bewildered here."

Midoriya said, "A friend made it for us."

And Uraraka - the one in the net, that is - asked, "So, what tipped you off that-"

But the proper Uraraka wasn't having it. "Stop, stop! We're the ones asking the questions now."

Before they could actually get to any questions, a soft glow illuminated the girl's bored face - a level of boredom he couldn't remember ever having seen on Uraraka's real face.

_Is that her_ _phone_?

"What - what are you doing?" he demanded, with a lot less strength than he'd aimed for.

"Textin'."

Now it was his turn to be bewildered. ". . . who?"

"Deku!" Uraraka cried out, pointing up at the girl as she held her phone up to take a selfie. "She's going to tell the League she's been captured!"

_Oh no . . ._

He wasn't really supposed to use his **quirk** except at school, home, or work-study, but given that this was _technically_ campus, he was pretty sure stopping her would be sanctioned. As soon as he could feel the rush of adrenaline pump into his veins, he leaped up towards the net, hoping to snatch the phone through the gaps in the net.

Instead, he just got a shoe to the face as she reclined further.

He managed to hold onto the net, but by the time he got his arm through, he heard the sound effect for a sent text.

"Too late," she said turning to show him her screen. She was sticking her tongue out and rolling her eyes, magenta text beneath her face reading, '**Got captured, lmao!'**

"Don't worry though," she said, pocketing her phone and making a swipe at his hand. "I'm not going anywhere. In fact, this is kind of ideal."

The damage was already done, from what he could tell, and he didn't fancy trying to grope for her phone in the dark, so he dropped back to the ground, letting Full Cowling fade.

"Ideal?" Uraraka asked. "What are you talking about? Why are you _here_? Why are you _spying_ on Deku and me?"

"Tch." It was almost possible to hear her rolling her eyes from here. "I'm not _spying,_ I'm helping you. And that's what I'm here to do - help you."

Midoriya and Uraraka glanced at each other, blinked a few times, then looked back up.

He asked, "So, help us? . . . are you saying you're defecting?"

She rolled around just enough that they could see the weird look she was giving them. "What? No. This isn't about the League or anything, I'm just here to help you two realize you have feelings for each other, dummies."

_What? That's the worst excuse I've ever heard._

Uraraka looked more flustered by that than he did, though. "Oh yeah?! Well, we were figuring that out _fine_ by ourselves, why would you even care about that? What are you even trying to h-"

She cut herself off, probably in response to the dread that was surely all over his face. "Deku...?"

His eyes were wide, almost too scared to ask, "Uraraka . . . did you ask me out last week?"

She immediately frowned. "No . . . what? You came to my room and asked me if we could go . . . to the mall."

"Oh no."

She looked alarmed, but hadn't put the pieces together yet. "What? What happened?"

He let out a long sigh, more like his breath was being stolen than anything.

". . . You came to my room and asked _me_ out to the mall last week."

They looked up to find the girl rolled all the way around, clutching the ropes and grinning down at them like a drooling cartoon spider.

"See?!" she said, "I'm _not_ spying on UA."

_No, no, no . . ._ The implications of her lying were frightening, but the implications of her telling the truth were even more so. He tried playing through scenario after scenario in his head from her perspective, trying to figure out what information or leverage she stood to gain. He started muttering to himself to make sure the lines of his logic were sound, jumping from thread to logical thread.

Uraraka was used to that by now, so she ignored him.

She was busy yelling: "You're messing with us! I can't believe it, that's just so . . ." she sniffled, although he wasn't entirely sure she'd started crying yet, ". . . so _mean._"

The girl in the net frowned, obviously upset by her tears, brushing at the ropes as if she were brushing hair instead.

"Ochaco . . ."

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" she snapped. "WE ARE NOT FRIENDS! AND STOP _LOOKING_ LIKE ME!

She stopped pawning at the net and pouted in response. "I can't."

Uraraka quieted, but still sounded frustrated. "What do you mean, 'you can't?'"

She sighed. "I mean, when I **disable my quirk**, it-"

Midoriya's eyes snapped up as the final threads wove together in an instant. "-your clothes go away too, don't they?"

"Yeah," she nodded, still pouting.

And then Uraraka was back to yelling: "WHAT?!" She looked to him. "WHY do you KNOW that?"

His face was grim and cold, sure now that he had uncovered the truth.

He said, "You impersonated a Shiketsu student during the Provisional License exams, didn't you?"

Her face brightened immediately into a smile. "Yeah! I did a pretty good job too, I think. You were smart, but I still pulled one over on you."

He nodded. "I thought so. Ever since I saw you during the raid on the Shie Hassaikai headquarters, I thought that it was you I met that day, Himiko Toga!"

She looked rather pleased at the acknowledgement, but before she said anything, he looked to Uraraka.

"I think she's telling the truth. She's not a spy. She's a stalker."

"What? What do you mean?"

The exams had been a blur, but he was pretty sure he remembered everything: "Back during the Provisional License Exam, I found someone who looked like you on the battlefield during the dodgeball portion. Something was off, and I thought somebody must have been used a transformation **quirk**, and-"

"Oh!*" The spark of realization finally caught. "The molestor! I - I see. This is her? Why does she- HEY, STOP IT!"

Midoriya looked up to find Toga with a **knife**, cutting through the ropes beneath her.

Unsurprisingly, she didn't stop. "Why?" she asked. "It's really uncomfortable in these ropes, you know, and I'm cold."

Uraraka was already reaching for her phone. "Deku, run and get a teacher. I'll call the police and-"

The sound of the **knife** cutting stopped immediately. Toga stared down at them, her expression dead.

"Could you please _not_ do that?" she asked.

Midoriya glared at her. "With all due respect, Ms. Stalker, we know you're with the League, we know you worked with the Shie Hassaikai, we know you impersonated and possibly kidnapped a Shiketsu student, and we know you've been impersonating _us._ Why would we not contact the authorities now that we've caught you.

She raised her eyebrows, brandished the **knife**, and put it in her sweat shirt pocket. "Because I'm not here with the League or Shie Hassaikai, and I'm not here as a villain. I'm here on my own time for my own reasons, _like I said._"

"And what are your reasons? Why would you trick us into - going on a date? Why not just leave us alone?"

"Because!"

"Because _why?_"

She looked down at him with such a nervous, cookie-stealing kid expression on her face that it threw him off-guard.

"Are - are you really going to make me say it?" Her tone was just as unexpectedly hesitant, unlike literally every other interaction he'd had with her.

When he wasn't quick to respond, Uraraka was. "Well, yeah! Tell us!"

Toga slowly covered her hands with her face, completely hiding her eyes.

"Okay . . ." she said, "but you have to promise not to tell anyone."

"What? Why would we agree to that?"

". . . it's embarrassing."

Uraraka and Midoriya both look to each other, utterly baffled.

_Still, this might be a good opportunity for a bluff to pay off._

He nodded to himself, wishing he could communicate his plan without tipping off Toga, but just went for it: "Okay. We promise."

She opened a space between her fingers just wide enough to look down at them, though it was impossible to make out her eyes in return.

"It's love," she said. "You like Ochaco. And she likes you. It could not be more obvious if you painted the words on your uniform, and I made you come out and say so! Because I like you both. I think, if you two were together, that would make me very, very happy."

Midoriya tried and failed a number of times to start a response, but nothing was coming to mind. What kind of motivation was that? What even was that?

Uraraka stepped towards the net. ". . . I remember you now. You didn't just impersonate a Shiketsu student - you're the girl Tsu and I fought in the woods! When the League attacked us during Training Camp!"

Finally, Toga let her hands drop from her face, revealing an awful wide smile. "Oh, Ochaco, you remember me! I'm so glad."

Uraraka's expression was tense but unreadable. She was trembling.

"Uraraka . . ." he said, slowly lifting his hand to reach out after her.

She ignored it. "Deku, cut her down. I can handle her without her gear."

_What kind of gamble is that?!_

"What? Why?"

When she turned to look at him, he realized he'd never seen her face when she was truly angry.

"She hurt Tsu. She tried to stab me. She pretended to be me to get her hands on you - twice. And she helped kidnap Bakugo, not to mention whatever else she's been up to with the League . . . I'm gonna punch her."

He mulled it over until he could come up with a compromise that seemed safe.

When he looked up at her, she was back to texting again. "Ms. Stalker, I-"

"You know my name. It's Toga. Himiko Toga."

The research he'd been able to do on that front was limited. In her true form, she was a blonde teenage runaway, **quirk** unknown, wanted for conspiracy to commit acts of terror and multiple counts of attempted murder. Obviously she was skilled, even terrifyingly so - taking Uraraka and Tsu as a team on was no small feat, and she'd done so without using a **quirk**. But not without weapons . . .

"Toga. We'll let you down if you give us your **knife** and phone."

She glanced over her phone screen, pausing to consider. She said, "I'll give you my phone. But I'll never hand over my knife. It's **insurance**."

Midoriya looked to Uraraka for her opinion, and she was quick to give it: "I can handle her with a **knife** if I have to."

He nodded, walked over to the trap's anchor, and snapped it with a quick burst of enhanced strength. Leverage was all he needed to lower her down gently, and Uraraka walked over, pulling the net off of her without much trouble.

Toga bounced right to her feet once she was free, opening her arms wide as if for a hug.

"Thanks Ochaco! I-"

And before she could react, Ochaco decked her in the face as hard as she could, and Toga dropped onto the forest floor, out cold.

He winced as he walked back to them. "I don't think you needed to do that."

The anger was already draining away from her face as she shook her hand to try and make the pain go away.

"No, but I wanted to," she said with a smile.

* * *

Midoriya noticed Toga was awake a few minutes later as he was carrying her back along the trail up to the school. She caught his eye as he looked down, her face strangely red (he hoped the punch wouldn't leave that big of a mark).

"You're awake. Good. We're almost to Professor Aizawa."

He expected her to tense up, maybe try to fight herself free.

What he didn't expect was for her to whisper, "Izuku," so softly, and press against his body as close as she could. He wasn't sure what to make of that until he heard her make a long, sharp inhale, and realized she was . . . sniffing him?

"You smell like her lotion . . ." she said dreamily. Unnervingly.

Some thought broke her reverie, and her voice turned back to normal. "Ochaco hits really hard. She's really cool."

That, at least, was something close to normal. Something he could respond to.

"I'm sorry she hit you. I didn't realize she was serious."

She shrugged (as well as she could being carried like this). "Friends** fight**. It happens."

_I don't get it._

"Why do you do that? Pretend you're friends?"

"Ochaco _is_ my friend. Even if she hates me, I really think of her as my friend."

He was quiet for a moment.

Then, "When you said you like us, did you mean-"

She cut him off quickly, "I love you. I have since the first moment I saw you beaten half to death in those woods. I knew you were exactly the kind of boy I like."

He just looked at her, eyes wide and confused. Frowning. What kind of boy could she possibly like that he qualified as?

She went on, "And when Ochaco beat me to protect her friend, Tsu, I fell in love with her, too. I like people like that. People who will **fight** even when they're hurting because they have something to fight for."

It was hard to know what to say to that. Every time she brought up love, it was so hard to follow what she was saying. Half the time it sounded like she was just speaking nonsense, but other times she came through with remarkable clarity. She had a clearer time explaining why she liked Uraraka than he did! And he couldn't even pretend it was a bad reason.

"I-"

_pew!_

It was such a little sound, his instinct to dodge didn't kick in, and a fraction of a second later, he felt the dart embed itself in his leg. It immediately started cramping, and although he tried to hold onto her, Toga rolled out of her arms, **knife** already in hand.

She made a swipe for his ankles as soon as she landed, but it was predictable enough that he managed to jump away and plant his feet.

One enemy behind, one in front. He had to** fight**.

_Full Cowling!_

. . . but nothing happened.

"What?" he muttered, concentration slipping. He turned to look at whoever was behind him just in time to get decked in the face.

"Twice!" he cried as he backpedaled, trying to roll with the punch down into a crouch. He glanced down at his hands, but no matter how he tried to focus, the jolt of adrenaline wouldn't come.

_I can't use One for All!_

"Boy, these things are handy!" Twice said, admiring the modified gun in his hand.

"Would have been better with a real bullet," he muttered a second later.

"Sorry, Izuku, but I don't want to go to jail."

He shifted his attention to Toga, but all he got was her shoe in his face again, kicking him prone.

Dazed as he was, Toga didn't have to struggle leaning over him with a big grin on her face. Unnerving as that face had looked on Camie, it was twice as alien on Uraraka.

She gave a deep sigh of satisfaction. "Yeah, that's it. We can't stay and make you even prettier, but this was pretty good." She stepped over him, meeting up with Twice.

"Bye-bye*," she called over her shoulder, and then the two of them were gone.

Midoriya had known about the quirk-erasing effect these bullets had, but he didn't realize how much pain they left you in. He'd barely managed to get back to his knees before Uraraka and Aizawa arrived, hauling him to his feet.

"Where did they go?" Aizawa asked, glancing around in every direction. He'd taken the time to don his goggles, likely suspecting backup from the League, but if there were any others, they weren't making themselves known.

Midoriya shook his head. "I think they went that way, towards the wall, but I'm not sure. I got hit with one of the yakuza's special bullets and I . . ."

"Understood." Aizawa finally finished scanning, instead looking down at Midoriya. "I've alerted all the staff I can, and they'll be here soon. But you need to get away from any **fighting** and go to Recovery Girl, understand?"

"Yes, Professor."

* * *

**Toga, December 9, 11:51**

Toga and Twice were out of breath long before they made it somewhere that felt safe, but eventually they needed to catch their breath in an alleyway while they worked out an extraction. Twice must have been having twice the trouble breathing through his mask, but she knew taking it off wasn't an option. They'd just need to account for it if they were going to be running much longer. Hopefully the campus would focus more on protecting the students than sending out Heroes to find them.

"What - what were you - DOING Toga?" He was hunched over, hands on his knees as he wheezed.

He clearly meant to admonish her, but she just threw back her head and laughed - as well as she could short on air, which at best was not very much.

"I was on a date! - There was a bit of a hiccup, but I think it turned out - all right! It looked like it was gonna - suck at the start though, not gonna lie."

"Well I - hope it was worth it."

"What bullshit."

"Oh, it was," she said with her awful grin. "My plans are messed up but I - I'm not out yet. I'm not done having fun!"

And that, at least, got a laugh out of him. "Good - I'm glad. You're so goddamn stupid. Next time you might - need a rescue, though? Give me a heads - up. And I'll - ignore you. But for real. A text will do."

"Yeah, of course, Twice," she said, slapping him twice on the shoulder. "Now it's time to start running for our lives again."


	4. Daze

**Summary: **Deku gets some unasked-for advice from Kirishima. He spends the weekend with his mom while recovering from the effects of the quirk-destroying bullet. He encounters a familiar face on the train. Uraraka catches him after class.

* * *

The debrief with Professor Aizawa and Principal Nezu started only an hour later, as soon as he was discharged from the med bay. He told them everything he could link back to Toga, dating back to their encounter during the League's ambush months ago through Uraraka knocking her unconscious moments before she escaped. The only thing he didn't tell them - couldn't figure out _how_ to tell them - was her explanation for why she liked him and Uraraka. She was crazy. Reading into it wouldn't help anyone.

Izuku's first priority, according to Recovery Girl, was to sleep as much as possible, as if he were sick. That was the only way to recover from Eri's quirk, and he started as soon as he could crawl into his bed around 2am. A call from his Mom asking when he'd be coming home got him out of bed earlier than he probably should have, and once he was awake, All Might was quick to drag him away and make sure that he was all right.

By the time he was actually packed up and ready to go sleep at home for the weekend, he had done very little resting and a whole lot of explaining that he was quite all right, he just needed to sleep. Basically the only person he wasn't able to feed this explanation to was Uraraka, who he hadn't seen since he was taken to see Recovery Girl last night. He'd hoped they'd get a chance to talk, but he really _did_ need to sleep, and any conversation the two of them would have would be even more difficult than the ones he'd already had with UA's staff.

* * *

**Midoriya, December 10, 3:30pm**

It was in this daze that Kirishima found him, standing in the hallway with his bags packed staring out the dorm windows. He didn't even jump when Kirishima slung his arm around him, staring out the window as if there was genuinely something interesting to be seen.

Kirishima said, "Heard you had a run-in with a **villain** last night. You doing okay?"

Midoriya blinked, as if he'd only just realized Kirishima was there.

"Yeah, I'm okay. She didn't try to hurt me or anything, she just wanted to . . . talk, mostly." He shrugged. "Uraraka knocked her out before she had an opportunity to do anything, anyway."

"Ohh, so you _both_ ran into the **villain**," Kirishima grinned, finally looking down at Midoriya. "Just what were you two doing out so late, huh?"

Izuku smiled back, but his eyes ended up drifting down to the carpet.

"That's just the thing. Her quirk is transformation. She pretended to be Uraraka to lure me out. She did the same thing to Uraraka the night before . . . and I guess she just wanted to talk."

"Whoah. Bizarre."

"Yeah."

Kirishima was blissfully not asking follow-up questions that Midoriya had been trying and failing to answer all day, like 'are the two of you dating?' or 'do you know why the **villain** would have taken an interest in you two, specifically?'

Kirishima tapped Midoriya's shoulder, right on the strap of his overnight bag. "You going somewhere?"

Midoriya nodded. "Yeah, I'm headed to see my mom. She wants me to stop by and have dinner when I can, so I'm just walking to the train station."

"Good on you dude," Kirishima said, ruffling Midoriya's hair (he was genuinely too out of it to be bothered, and Kirishima was relentlessly taking advantage of it).

"Want me to walk you to the station?"

Midoriya tilted his head curiously. "Why?"

"Uh, a **villain** ambushed you like _last night_. I know you like to be tough, but it's gotta be at least a little freaky."

"I . . ." but try as he might, he couldn't come up with a proper excuse. ". . . yeah. Thanks, Kirishima."

Once they were outside of the dorm building, Kirishima asked, "So, what'd she want to talk about anyway? Seems awfully risky of her to show up here unless it was really important."

Midoriya shrugged. "I guess, from her perspective, it was?"

He just got a quizzical look back. "Uh. Whaddya mean?"

Midoriya hesitated. He'd left out Toga's stated motivation - to get him and Uraraka to confess their feelings for each other - when talking to other students, but he couldn't pretend it wasn't bothering him. This was probably his last chance to talk about it before he was gone for the weekend, and he and Kirishima were just distant enough that their friend groups didn't really overlap. Maybe it was hazy thinking, but . . .

He looked over at Kirishima. "Don't tell anyone what I'm about to tell you, all right?"

"Uh, sure man."

Midoriya took a deep breath. "She . . . she was using her quirk to try and get me and Uraraka to . . . say we like each other." He'd said it several times by this point, but he couldn't keep from getting red and flustered every time. Surely it would get easier - one day. Definitely not today.

"Whoah, _super_ bizarre." Kirishima grinned at him; "Did you, though?"

He blinked. "Did I . . . what?"

"Tell Ochaco you liked her?"

"I, uh, - I mean, yes?" The fluster was getting worse without any energy to contain it. "I guess? we went on a date to the mall but . . . I mean, Toga orchestrated the whole thing, making us both think the other asked us out, and-"

"Whoah, whoah, _back up._ She'd done this before?"

Midoriya nodded. "Yeah. At least once."

"Wooow. She must _really_ want you two to date."

Another nod. "Yeah, I think so . . . and I told that to Principal Nezu and everything, but there was something . . . else that she said. And I don't know what to think of it."

They had made it to the street at this point, pausing for a moment to cross the street. Midoriya almost managed to forget what he was trying to say until Kirishima prompted him on the other side:

"Uh, what'd she say?"

"She told me . . . she told _us_ that she likes us. Both of us. Like, like-likes us. And that's why she wanted to help us."

Kirishima's eyes widened with wonder. "Whooooaahhh."

Beat.

"That's crazy."

"I know," Midoriya said.

"No, like, she's probably lying. Or just actually crazy. That makes no damn sense."

Midoriya scratched the back of his head. He wanted to believe that was true, to believe there was some conspiracy in the works that would end with him kicking someone really, really hard in a way that asserted his expectations onto the world. But he just couldn't shake the things Toga had said to him after waking up in his arms.

"She . . . might be crazy, but I don't think she's lying. She told me why she likes us and I really think she was being sincere."

Kirishima shook his head in apparent disbelief. "You've got a crazy life, man, always in the middle of whatever's going on. But if she really likes you so much, maybe if you run into her again, you can convince her to **stop being a** **villain**. Or maybe just give up dirt on her buds in the League."

He tapped his own temple, smirking. "We've gotta be thinking smart to take these guys down."

He laughed, but Midoriya could only manage a little huff alongside him. That idea was just as crazy as she was, and definitely not serious. It was such a dangerous idea, of course all he should do was laugh at the very thought. You don't turn villains good over a crush. Nothing is that easy.

Well, whatever he thought of that idea, it didn't matter. There was no way she was going to show up again after nearly getting caught.

* * *

**Midoriya, December 11, 6:55pm**

Midoriya collapsed into bed minutes after arriving home and greeting his mother, and all he managed to do in the next 28 hours or so was eat, sleep, and watch a little TV. By the evening the next day though, his body ached less and his brain felt a lot clearer - not to mention he could feel the current of One For All inside of him again, even if it was a little more finicky than usual. Glad that he wouldn't need to take a day of class off, he took the train headed back to UA with a tupperware filled with snacks he was supposed to share with his friends stuffed in his bag.

A few minutes after he got on, somebody entered his nearly-empty car wearing a big hoodie and baggy pants that left them totally nondescript. He thought nothing of them until they sat down on the seat right next to him, even though there were many, many open seats without anyone immediately adjacent. He did his best not to look at them, not to make things weird, especially given that they had their hood up.

That is, until she spoke.

"Hi there, Izuku."

He spotted the knife hilt drawn from her sweat shirt pocket, and put it together a second too late: "Toga!"

"Sssshhhh," she said, raising a finger to her lips (he couldn't quite see her face, but at least he could see the gesture). "Please don't make a scene."

She dropped her hand from her face but still wouldn't look at him. She kept her knife half-drawn, and he knew, from this position, she had a significant advantage. Nevermind the fact that he might not be able to use One For All properly, but a knife wouldn't need nearly as much momentum as a punch or kick to inflict serious damage, and repositioning in the train car faster than she could clear the mere inches between them just wasn't realistic from a seated position.

So, like her hand, he froze in place.

"I just wanted to check on you," she said. Her voice wasn't quite like he'd anticipated - low and threatening, like he typically expected from female **villains**. It was high, airy, and casual, like they were just having a chat on the train to school.

Which, to be fair, they were.

She said, "You looked a little freaked out when I last saw you . . . you okay?"

It was hard not to yell, but he tried (and half-succeeded) at keeping his voice as steady as hers: "I was freaked out because you and your villain buddy attacked me - and you took my quirk!"

"I never said it wasn't my fault." The casual tone slipped, but her voice stayed flat.

_Is she . . . sulking?_

"Besides. I wasn't trying to kill you, I just didn't want to go to prison."

He'd glare at her if he could. "If you don't want to end up in prison, why are you a **villain**?"

That apparently got to her, because she dropped her hood and glared right at him. Her eyes were sharp and yellow, like he remembered, but he'd never seen her mouth betray so much _disapproval._ Or anything but sadistic glee, to be fair.

"If _you_ don't want to end up dead in the ground, why are you a **_Hero_**?"

He'd never heard the question, 'why are you a Hero?' delivered with that much venom before, and it escalated so quickly. Like every third sentence she said, it just left him flabbergasted for a moment.

After that moment, though, he was able to calm down and realize, really, that the question itself wasn't any different than normal, even if the delivery was so negative: _why be a __**hero**__ if you might die?_ That, at least, was easy.

"I want to save people, even if it means a **villain** will kill me someday. As long as the world ends up a little safer, a little more hopeful . . . then it was worth it."

And as quick as her dissatisfaction had come, it softened, leaving only a little smile on her face. Her eyes were bright and expressive, and it was obvious when she faked a smile - like right now. For all of her skills at misdirection and deception, Midoriya realized that bold-faced lying must not be one of them.

She said, "Then you understand why I'm a **villain**, even if it means that I'll end up in prison one day."

"It's not the same!" It was a lot harder to keep his voice as flat and quiet when she was looking right at him, when she wouldn't look away.

"I'm trying to uphold a peaceful society! _You're_ trying to destroy that peace."

And the fake smile faded. There was almost _too much_ animation to her face, and her voice sounded eerily like **a hiss**: "Have you ever considered for one second that there is no real peace in this society? Not for the people who **don't fit**."

She was clearly upset, but she wasn't gripping her knife anymore. Her hostility was all at his words now, and he wasn't sure what to do with that. _Besides, what does 'real peace' even mean?_

"What do you mean?"

Finally, she broke eye contact, staring somewhere around the floor and their legs. After a brief pause, she asked, ". . . you've figured out what my quirk is, but have you figured out how it works?"

He'd been a little too preoccupied to jot anything down in his notebooks or consult the theory forums for **heroes** and **villains** with unknown or poorly-understood quirks, so the short answer was _'No.'_ But, given just the pieces he could remember right now . . .

"Something to do with blood?" he asked. "Tsu said you stuck Uraraka with a giant needle."

She looked up at the ceiling of the train car, and his eyes followed hers, thinking she was going to demonstrate something. Only after a few seconds of nothing happening did he look back down and realize she'd opened her mouth, a finger pointing to her teeth. Most of them were long and sharp, like incisors, with four in particular more like **fangs** than human teeth and at least twice as long. It was a bit like staring into the mouth of **a venomous snake** \- deeply unsettling.

Perhaps she heard his nervous swallowing, because a second later she closed her mouth. "I drink it," she said, "and ever since I was a little kid, I've felt the need to drink it _out_ of people. You can imagine how people responded once they found out."

_Drinking blood?! That's so . . . gross._

"So, um . . . **just . . . don't do that**?"

She nodded, and he figured that meant he had the right answer. Not that he'd doubted it - it just sounded too simple.

"**Just don't.** That's what people have been telling me my entire life, Izuku: don't bite. Don't smile like that. Don't talk about your feelings or your _weird_ crushes. Just be a nice girl. Just be **normal**."

His brow furrowed with concern. _What does all of that have to do with anything? That's just people being kind of mean . . . but biting people is assault._

"Well, guess what?" she whispered, as if sharing a secret. "I'm not **normal**. I'm never going to be **normal**. There is never going to be enough of me that's normal that people will tolerate the rest. Not in your so-called 'peaceful society,'" she said, making air quotes.

He started to protest, but before he could get so much as a syllable out, she cut him off, "And, you know, _I_ at least can pretend to be normal, for a while, if I have to. But some people can't ever be normal. **Some people will never belong.** And I'd rather be beside them than the people who tell me 'just don't.'"

She hadn't been nearly this talkative last night, and he felt like, if he were a little smarter, he could be getting a lot of useful information from this. He tried to put together just the right response that she'd keep talking, maybe slip up and give him something, but there was an undercurrent of hurt to everything she was saying he couldn't bring himself to ignore.

He said, "That sounds like . . . it's been really hard. I'm sorry."

She turned back to looking straight ahead in her seat, hands crossed over her chest, with one foot resting on her other knee. She had her hair down, unlike all the previous times he'd seen her, and she had a lot of it. No wonder it wouldn't all fit in a bun underneath her hood.

Either she had managed to keep her hair very carefully colored as a fugitive, or blonde was her natural hair color. When he'd seen her profile, he'd just assumed her hair was bleached, but that definitely didn't look like it was the case. It was shiny and healthy-looking, so light at the tips it looked almost white. An unusual mutation, to be sure - and he couldn't imagine for the life of him why it would have emerged alongside such an unusual quirk.

". . . it's not your fault," she finally said, snapping him out of his reverie. He hadn't realized he'd been staring.

She continued, "**You've always been normal**. You don't have any reason to notice the people standing outside."

He wanted badly to contest that. He'd been 'standing outside' his whole life - quirkless and weak, idolizing **heroes**. From the day he discovered he would never present a quirk to the day All Might offered to give him One for All, he'd felt like there was a pane of glass between him and the only life he could see himself living. Too weak to shatter it. He knew he was lucky - as lucky as someone in his position could be. But he hadn't forgotten what it had been like.

Of course, he couldn't say anything like that. Not without giving away the secret of One for All, and he had no way of knowing how much the League did or didn't know about it.

"I'm sorry you've had a bad life, Toga, but that doesn't excuse . . ."

He trailed off as he spotted a woman further down the car staring at him. As soon as he made eye contact with her, she glanced at her phone, but it was obvious that she was still watching them from her peripheral vision.

Toga noticed the woman too, and glanced out the window behind them.

"Looks like this is my stop," she said as the train started slowing, pulling her hood back up before standing.

Now that he was properly looking, it was obvious that the heavy clothes were meant to conceal the person underneath rather than just a fashion choice - he needed to be more attentive to things like that, now that he was working as a hero.

The train stopped, and Toga left without another word, keeping her head down and walking fast.

He should have been relieved that she left without incident. If a fight had broken out between them, there could be considerable collateral damage to the train, nevermind the passengers that might have gotten in Toga's way. But what Kirishima had said stuck with him, and now, he realized, was probably the best chance he was going to get to get her talking about herself.

**"Doors now closing..."**

He was out the door in a flash, onto a deck he'd never seen in a part of town he'd never been to before. The sky was heavy and overcast, but it had not yet started to rain, so instead there was just a frigid cold in the still air.

If it had been any busier, he probably would have lost Toga there, but out of a dozen people on the platform, her bulky outline was easy to spot. He chased after her.

"Wait!" he called after her. She glanced over her shoulder, but kept moving at a brisk pace.

He had to run, but it didn't take him long to catch up; "Please wait," he begged, slowing in front of her.

"That woman recognized me. I need to put distance between myself and the train."

He nodded. "Then I'll walk with you."

She paused as she passed him, staring up at him, suspicious. ". . . if you're trying to follow me to the League, it won't work. I'm not stupid."

He shook his head. "I know you're not. I just want to talk, promise. You've got a knife, and I've got no quirk. I'm **no threat** to you."

"Oh, you're **a threat**," she said, smirking. "But okay."

_I may not have total control of One for All right now, but that's nothing new. In an open environment like the street, I should be able to at least flee if I can't fight . . . I don't see why she'd find me threatening, though. She knows I'm not authorized to use my quirk outside of school._

They walked together silently for several minutes, not clearly going anywhere from what he could tell, while she occasionally texted on her phone. It was a little too normal - nothing suspicious enough that it would alert a hero who happened to walk by without him obviously signaling and potentially getting himself or others hurt. He'd just have to think of what to say.

He broke the silence first.

"You know, what you said about some people not **belonging** . . . or not feeling like they belong, I guess. I think you're right. But I _also_ think the world is getting better. When the world feels safe, people stop being so afraid of differences. And without that fear, they learn to accept people. **All sorts of people**."

Finally, the rain started, and it was every bit as miserable as he'd anticipated. Toga looked up at the rain as if she were surprised it was there.

She said, "I get what you're trying to say. And I'm sure that, slowly, some people _are_ becoming more accepted by society. But . . ."

She stopped looking up at the rain, instead pulling her hood as far forward as it would go to protect her from it. ". . . when people think the world around them is peaceful, they come to hate any reminder of something else. **Something not-right**."

"Could you . . . explain that a little more?"

Toga was quiet for a long moment, engrossed in thought. When she started speaking again, her voice sounded weird - _Like a normal girl. Weird for _her.

"Recently, a friend of mine died. All of a sudden. She got into a fight and then she was just... gone. She was someone I knew would never belong in 'society.' She was transgender . . . 'assigned male at birth,'* she called it, but she lived as a woman. She didn't have a quirk like mine to have whatever body she wanted, and she was always too poor, too far from being normal to change her body with medicine or anything. And even when people didn't know she was a **villain**, they were afraid of her. Too masculine to be read as a woman, too feminine to be read as a man. And people hated her for it. People always treated her like she was **a threat** even when she wasn't doing _anything_, because she didn't fit in the version of the world that tells you you're a boy or a girl and you have no say in it."

Her voice started to sound choked, like maybe she was crying, but her hood kept him from being able to see her face and be certain. "And I wanted . . . so badly to make a world where she didn't have to deal with that. With all of society's expectations, and all the people telling her '**just don't** be a woman,' and definitely 'don't be something so obviously neither.' Her life was never peaceful, and now she's dead. The end."

Midoriya had heard of transgender people before, of course. The way his mom explained it to him, trans people were people who felt wrong in their body, and so took steps to change it. He thought it was kind of cool that a psychic issue could be remedied so readily, and hadn't really put any thought into the limitations that had to keep people from moving from Point A to Point B. If there were medical barriers, that would cost money - which of course meant some people wouldn't be able to afford it. And if there were social barriers, then a failure to fit in would certainly put you in a tough spot: **conform**, and you make yourself miserable, **or take your own path**, and others will make you miserable.

He'd never considered that being transgender could make your life difficult in modern society, and now felt deeply stupid for missing that blind spot.

He said, "I'm sorry about your friend. About . . . all of it. That isn't fair."

She didn't hear him - or, at least, didn't acknowledge he'd spoken. After a few seconds, she just said, "You know, _Deku_, Ochaco got me thinking about how you love All Might. How you want to become just like him, saving people with a smile. And I really, really . . . like that about you. You just want to help. Every time we meet as **hero** and **villain**, you're trying to save people. You break yourself to protect your friends, and your society. Like you owe it to them - to everyone."

When she looked over at him, despite her kind words, she didn't look the least bit sweet. Just frustrated.

"But 'society' never helped me, and it definitely never helped my friend. Being asked to protect it, support it, work for that **collective good** . . . it's insulting. Why do I owe so much to people who gave me so little, who only ever wanted to be rid of me? When will society return the favor?"

There was something . . . difficult about talking to Toga. It was like everything she said was true, or at the very least _undeniable_, but he knew it led to brutal conclusions. Or, at least, that's where she led it.

". . . I can't say you're wrong, and I think you're right that society failed you, and failed your friend. But you're wrong about one thing."

She tilted her head curiously - puzzlement was a strangely innocent look on her face.

He said, "I don't want to save people because I owe them. **I just can't stand seeing people suffer.** And that's true for All Might, too."

She paused at a street corner, and at first he just figured she was trying to decide which random turn to take to make her path harder to follow. But, instead, she turned to face him, pulling off her hood. Her eyes were wide and bright, expression somehow turned soft again. A blush was creeping into her cheeks as a smile - a real smile - broke out on her face. It was a little unsettling seeing her **fangs** bared like that, but he knew it wasn't **a threat**. The smile made it to her eyes.

"You are so beautiful, you know that?"

Her words hit him as hard as she had two days ago, and he flushed with embarrassment. It was hard enough to deal with her saying nice things when they were talking normally - it was twice as weird when they were arguing!

"W-what? Where is this coming from?"

She reached her hand out towards him, and although he flinched, he didn't step away. She wouldn't be able to deal any real harm with a touch like that - not even enough to draw blood. She slipped her hand between the part in his sweatshirt and over his chest.

"Your heart, I mean. It's filled with a beautiful feeling." Her hand shifted over his heart as her eyes dropped from his, down at her hand. "And it's . . . really fast."

The moment went on like that for several seconds while he sat still, utterly incapable of speaking. Toga as **a villain** was scary, her voice laced with a menace that undermined the content of everything she said. But this was Toga **the girl,** and he had no idea how to take the content of what she was saying now.

"Although, I like the rest of you, too," she said with a smile. She squeezed his chest for a second before pulling her hand back to her side.

_Is she hitting on me?!_

"Th-thank you? I, um . . ."

She tilted her head to the side, and his babbling choked in his mouth. Without the hood on, her hair spilled down her neck and shoulder, a trail for rain to run down her side. With only the lights of the florescents and the gray sky to go by, he could still see the red in her face, the only consolation in this horrifying embarrassment - at least she looked as embarrassed by what she'd just done as he must as well!

And, despite himself, he knew that Toga was definitely, irrefutably beautiful, even as her smile made his skin crawl. There was something innocent to her he did not, could not understand - could not put to words.

And, as quick as all her shifts seemed to be, Toga's warmth was gone.

She said, "But there are people suffering where you can't see them, Deku. **How are you going to save them?**"

The warmth in him disappeared just like hers had, replaced with dread. How could she fluctuate between innocence and cynicism so fast and so wholly while keeping her senses? Or had she abandoned them entirely?

And how did she always ask things he couldn't answer?

She looked down the street behind her, then back at him.

"I think this is where we part ways tonight. Thanks for walking with me; I feel like I got some stuff I really wanted to say off my chest! I'll see you around, Izuku."

She turned and walked away, across the street, taking with her any chance he had at finding out about the League. Unless . . . unless . . .

"W-wait!" he called after her; "My phone number!"

She glanced over her shoulder with such drama, she looked offended. She stood on the curb across the street, but at least she stopped.

"You want to talk to me again, right? And Uraraka. It'll be safer if you text me."

She turned around, standing on the very edge of the curb.

She said, "You won't be able to find me with my phone number; I use burner phones."

"That's okay. I won't try and find you."

She crossed the street slowly, arms crossed over her chest. When she finally stood in front of him, her eyes were narrowed in obvious suspicion, and he thought he'd pissed her off. A failed gambit.

". . . okay . . . so you're just giving it to me to . . . talk?"

He nodded. "Yeah."

And she broke into a bright grin, **fangs and all**. "Okay!"

She pulled out her phone, and he gave his phone number. His real phone number. To a member of the League of Villains. He felt idiotic through the whole process, and yet he went through with it, even though he got the impression that if he asked her to delete it right now, she might.

"Awesome!" she said as she finished making his contact profile. She took the last step between them, up onto her toes, and kissed his cheek.

As if she had done nothing weird, she said, "I'll let you know when I'm ready for **another date**. And don't mind me if I double text!" She shoved her phone in her pocket and turned to leave.

"Bye, Toga."

She gave him one last glance. "Bye-bye, Izuku. Love you!"

As she disappeared down the street, the past minute overwhelmed him all at once. _Why did she think this was a date?! How could she say 'love you' so casual like that?!_ And, as he pressed his hand to his chest, he wondered, _Why is my heart beating so fast?_

He was afraid. She was terrifying, **a monster in the form of a teenage girl**. 'Conspiracy to commit acts of terror.' 'Attempted murder.' He was lucky to be walking away unscathed from an encounter with her. That was all there was to it.

He shook his head clear of all thoughts but getting out of the rain and started back towards the train station.

* * *

**Midoriya, December 12, 11:15pm**

"Deku!"

Midoriya was often one of the last kids to file out of class regardless of where he sat, so people from class waiting for him outside wasn't unusual. The thing that was unusual was that Uraraka was marching straight towards him with a big orange bottle, and that stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Uraraka?"

She handed him the bottle without explanation, and he rolled it around in his hands to have a clue what was going on. It was lotion. Just a bunch of lotion.

". . . why would I need this much lotion?" he asked, more to himself than anything.

"It - it's nothing like that!"

He looked back up to find her red in the face, hands clenched at her sides - clearly he'd said something wrong, but for the life of him he couldn't figure out what. "O . . . kay?"

"It's orange citrus! And also this is a completely normal amount of lotion, you just don't use it as much as you should!"

She shook her head and that seemed to reset her voice to a regular volume. "It's for the **smell**, Deku."

Their conversation drifted from right in front of the door to right in front of the window across the hall, interrupting foot traffic at best slightly less.

"The **smell**?"

"Yeah." She leaned in closer and lowered her volume again, "I realized something recently - you and Toga wear the same body spray I think, or something so subtle and similar I can't tell the difference. She's able to look like one of us convincingly, but I don't think she'd be able to copy your **smell**. So . . ."

He finally brightened into a smile as he got it. "That's really smart!"

Then, the counterpart of this concern came to him: "What do . . . _you_ **normally smell like**? Sorry for the weird question."

She put her finger to her chin in thought, but the answer came quick: "I guess I **smell** like cherry blossom? Like, my lotion and shampoo and conditioner are all cherry blossom."

She went a little bug eyed as she added, "I guess you can . . . **smell** me if you . . . want?"

She leaned a little bit forward as if offering her head, and somewhere in the world, Kaminari and Mineta were grinning freakishly.

But instead of what those awful spectres would have told him to do, he wacked himself in the forehead with an, "Oh, crap."

She quickly stood up straight again, startled. "What?"

"Your lotion," he sighed. "Toga said **I smell like your lotion**. She already knows what you **smell** like. And if you've been using the same stuff all this time . . ."

". . . she could copy me, yeah. Hm."

She pouted. "That's my favorite scent."

"It's good! Cherry blossom's great! . . . but maybe we just switch for now, just in case."

"You're right," she said, but her sulking had gone straight to her posture.

They'd used up most of their break between classes trying to exchange lotion, so she was pulling her backpack back on with an expression like **(-_-)** as he checked the time. Of course, there was a notification on his screen that he was doing his best to ignore until class was over for the day:

**H.T.: **What i'm saying is i don't think All Might's impact on crime is...

That was all he got from the preview, but it looked like they'd be continuing this morning's argument this evening.

As he slipped his phone into his pocket, he quietly said, "Hey, Uraraka . . ."

Her grumbling face reverted right back to normal as she looked up at him; "Yeah?"

"When I was coming back to school on the train a few days ago . . . I saw Toga. I mean, she found me and came to talk to me."

"Oh my god," she said, hand covering her mouth in horror for a second. "Are you okay?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I'm totally fine. She ended up mostly talking about herself, which I thought I could leverage to find out some information about the League, but she left before I could."

Uraraka shook her head, "That's fine, Deku! Your safety comes first."

He paused. Would it be safe to tell her? Or would she give his plan away to try and protect him?

_If you can't trust Uraraka, you're probably just doing something wrong._

He didn't think he was doing anything wrong; ergo . . .

"I . . . gave her my phone number. So I could keep trying to dig for information."

Her face was mostly alarmed, so he felt the need to keep explaining: "And I have! I've found out a lot about her, and why she joined the League, and a little bit about the other members. I even found out that a member of the League died recently, and - and I think I was actually able to figure out who it was."

"That's . . . that's really impressive, Deku . . ." she said, her eyes looking somewhere on the floor. ". . . but I don't think this is very safe."

He nodded, also starting to look at the floor instead of her. "Yeah, you're right. This is probably pretty stupid. I just . . . knowing I have an in to the League, something I could hand over to the Pros, it - it makes me want to **be helpful**. I don't want to lose this opportunity. And I think she really doesn't want to hurt me - I mean, she's had a few chances at this point, and I-"

He cut off as Uraraka slapped her hand onto her chest like she was making a pledge.

She said, "**I want to help, too**. Give me her number."

"U-Uraraka?"

He didn't expect her face to look so determined mere seconds after looking so worried, but her face was in its other **(-_-)** form, the one where she wouldn't quit until she'd won.

"You said you don't think she'll hurt you?" she asked. "Well that should go for me too - she said she likes both of us, remember? I am the chattiest, and I can get people talking. Let me **help**."

"I . . ." He couldn't help but feel there was something else going on here, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it.

And it would, in a way, be very nice to not be in this alone.

He nodded. "Let's do our best together."

"Oh, Deku, you're the best!" she took a step forward, and for a second he thought she was going to kiss him on the cheek like Toga had - but instead, she just flung her arms around him and pulled him into a tight hug. She squeezed so tightly he lost most of the air in his lungs, and that was before she lifted him into the air for a second in celebration.

Even when she plopped him back down, he only managed to hug her for a second (a second Kirishima caught as he walked into class, stopping to give him a thumbs-up and a wink) before she stepped apart.

"I mean, let's do our best!"

He was too flustered to express it, but her excited energy and that hug left him feeling weightless and giddy for so long that he nearly convinced himself she'd used her quirk on him. How she could manage to be so endearing by (apparently) total accident, he'd never understand.

But he liked it, and he liked her. That much he was sure of.


	5. Girls

**Summary: **Ochaco and Toga have been texting for over a week. Ochaco and Tsuyu have a weird conversation wherein something new comes to light. Mina helps Ochaco out, and Ochaco is forced to make a choice.

* * *

**Ochaco, December 22, 5:10pm**

It had been ten days since Ochaco and Toga started texting. Ten illuminating, confusing days.

Ochaco's feelings towards Deku became the topic of conversation much faster and much more often than she anticipated. Toga already knew her feelings, and could predict them with surprising depth - talking with her about them was somehow easier and more open than talking with her friends. In line with that, she was an incredible source of (surprisingly sound) advice, like 'you should talk to Deku more about your feelings!' and 'why don't you ask him to go on another date?' These ideas were a lot of fun to talk about, but seeing as how Deku and Ochaco both were so busy, she spent a lot more time talking to Toga about hypotheticals than actually putting any of the advice into action.

They didn't just text about Deku, of course. Toga also had a knack for sending funny pictures, especially weird selfies, when Ochaco least expected it. The selfies were always in bathrooms, so she wasn't really getting any helpful clues about the League from them. That wasn't to say she didn't like them - far from it! And she got so used to this photo exchange back and forth that a few days prior, she'd taken Toga 'shopping' with her when everyone else had been busy, sending photos in different outfits in exchange for advice. She couldn't really _afford_ any of the clothes, but all the weight she'd been putting on since moving into the dorms was rapidly forcing her hand to pick up something someday soon.

From a distance, Toga was weirdly pleasant. Weirdly non-threatening. Weirdly charming. Weirdly . . . attractive. Ochaco wanted to chalk up the occasional thought about Toga in those terms to the fact that she'd smelled so much like Hot Boy (that is, as neutral/unobtrusive as possible, and also like Deku), and the scent memory was just sending her the wrong vibes.

The stickler in that excuse, though, was the photos. After more than a week of texting back and forth, something about getting a new picture from Toga made her heart pick up a little too much to ignore.

And so it was that on this rainy Thursday evening that Ochaco and Tsu found themselves sitting on the floor of Ochaco's room, drinking tea and watching lifehack videos. She'd always found lifehack videos unhelpful (at best) or bizarre and unsettling (at worst), but Tsu found them endlessly entertaining, and the background music they played was a fine accompaniment to the _pitter-patter_ sprinkling outside.

This was one of their favorite things to do together: sit in a room together doing quiet activities. They talked so much between classes and work-study during the week, the time to just relax without socializing was a true blessing. Of course, they preferred to avoid socializing together. They were, after all, **best friends**.

Ochaco's phone buzzed with a new picture from Toga. (Despite how familiar they were, and how much more familiar she acted like they were, Toga still insisted on 'Toga' instead of 'Himiko.') It was a new bathroom selfie as per usual, finger-gun to her head with the text, **'Nothing going on today. Kill me'** blasting out the other side. Ochaco snickered, minimizing the picture to send something sympathetic back.

Tsu glanced up from the video, finger to her chin in curiosity. "Deku?" she asked.

Ochaco shook her head. "Um, no . . . you remember that villain Deku and I have been talking to, trying to find out more about the League?"

Tsu nodded. She had been against the plan when Ochaco and Deku teamed up to propose to her, but she'd agreed not to tell the teachers as long as they weren't party to any crimes she committed, and as long as they weren't putting others at risk. Somewhat consciously, somewhat not, Ochaco had minimized how much she mentioned Toga around Tsu, but given how regularly they were talking now . . .

Ochaco said, "I hadn't realized it before because, you know, we were fighting, but she really is just a teenager. She's funny - here, look!"

She opened the picture up again and held it out for Tsu to look. Tsu's expression remained unreadable until the picture was gone, but she was very still. Keeping her cards close to her chest for now. Typically, it was best not to try and get around the little defenses she put up, so Ochaco pretended she didn't notice.

There was another lengthy silence while Tsu returned to watching her videos and Ochaco bounced between social media apps.

Eventually, unprompted, Tsu said, "I'm worried you're starting to see her as a **friend** instead of a villain."

Her eyes didn't leave the video this time, which was normal enough, but she didn't have a blep either. This wasn't an offhand question.

Ochaco's lips pursed as she thought. Talking to Tsu was a little different than talking to other people - you thought more about what you were going to say, even if Tsu wouldn't tease you for saying something weird or dumb. It was more like, _She's putting effort into talking to me, so I'll put in effort, too._

Ochaco said, "Until we need to fight her, I don't see why we can't be both."

Tsu's answer was immediate - apparently, that was what she expected to hear. "She called us her **friends** during the training camp when she tried to kill us. She hurt me. She hurt you. Believing she's your** friend** back will only give her more chances to hurt you."

It was near-impossible to argue with Tsu when it came to something like this. She had such clear expectations that trying to contradict her seemed silly, especially given that Ochaco was usually just starting to think about whatever thing they were talking about.

This _wasn't_ something Ochaco had just started thinking about, though.

"She's . . . really kind to me. I don't think she wants to hurt me."

Tsu blinked a few times but kept her eyes on the video. "Whether she wants to or not doesn't matter. If you get in her way, she'll hurt you. Or, worse, you don't get in her way, or she takes advantage of your friendship. Then you've hurt yourself."

Ochaco had done her best to play out the scenarios of when she and Toga encountered each other again as hero and villain, and this was pretty much what she anticipated to. She liked to imagine, at least, that Toga would hesitate to hurt her if they were **friends**. That maybe she'd prefer to run away than fight if it came to that.

But Tsu was right. Those were Ochaco's own feelings, not Toga's.

"Tsu . . ." she said softly, looking for some contradiction. Permission, perhaps.

"I don't want anyone to hurt you, Ochaco. Not even you. So I worry."

Shame crept into Ochaco's heart.

It took a long moment for her to compose herself after that while Tsu just kept watching the videos. For some reason, the fact that she was watching the screen instead of looking at her bothered her today, even though it was such a normal thing between them. It made her feel like Tsu **wasn't listening** to the thing she _wasn't_ saying, the thing that felt so obvious and stupid about all of this. For all of her incredible talents, Tsu wasn't very good at reading subtext.

(Or maybe she just pretended she couldn't.)

Ochaco paused the video. Tsu continued to stare at the frozen screen for a good ten seconds or so before slowly turning to look at her, finger still on her chin, eyes betraying nothing of what she was thinking.

Ochaco said, "I know you're right, Tsu. About Toga. Talking to her like this is really stupid. And she's too smart to give up anything about the League - she catches on as soon as I try asking her about them."

"Then why are you talking to her?"

"I . . ." she immediately hesitated, but she knew exactly what she was feeling - she just had to say it!

"It sounds really stupid in my head, so I know it's only going to sound stupider out loud. But she makes me feel . . . really good about myself. She really **listens** to me, now matter how stupid or shallow I feel like I sound, and she's always got stuff to say about it, like what I say . . . matters."

That all added up to a remarkable thing, something she hadn't tried to put into words until just now: "I think **she really ****_does_**** like me**."

Tsu lowered her hand from her face eerily slow, eventually settling in her lap with the other.

She said, "I never thought she was a liar. I think she's **crazy**. And I think she doesn't mind hurting people - not even people she** likes**."

Ochaco knew that! She knew it. But there was something else, something deeper, and digging it up brought tears near the surface. Luckily, the words spilled out before tears could:

"You know, it was weird enough for me when I thought Deku asked me out, and he said all those romantic things to me. But at least part of me - a small part of me was prepared to hear that from him. I'd been thinking about it for who knows how long . . . but then, finding out that it wasn't him?, but an impostor who, by all accounts, shouldn't even know me? A villain? A _girl? _It doesn't make any sense to me, but it makes me feel . . ."

She placed her hand over her heart, struggling to find the word for it. Her hand clenched in the fabric of her shirt as tears started to flow down her face - she found it.

". . . important. Like I matter so much just for who I am."

She couldn't be sure, but she thought she saw Tsu's eyes widen ever-so-slightly with surprise. And her response came much faster than expected. "**Do you want her to like you?**"

Ochaco sniffled and shrugged, wiping away the tears. Crying about this felt so humiliating, especially in front of Tsu. But the answer to that question came to her immediately, and all she could do was temper the words.

"I . . . guess so?"

Just as fast, Tsu asked, "**Do you like her?**"

Ochaco paused, trying to make that question even make sense. She didn't even like girls, as far as she knew. She'd always liked boys! (or at least found them pretty). And yet . . .

"I . . . I don't know," she answered.

She was shocked to find Tsu's eyes glistening, as if she were about to cry, and her mouth turned into a grimace. She didn't make expressions like that. Not unless she was really hurting.

"Ochaco . . ." she said, as if struggling to speak.

_What did I do?_

And before Ochaco could say anything, Tsu hopped to her feet and left the room without another word.

Ochaco just sat there in shock and confusion, not only by her own failure to deny interest in Toga, but also in Tsu's reaction. She had only seen Tsu respond like that in the most dramatic of circumstances, and this situation hadn't reached that point. There were plenty of times where Ochaco would cry about something or other and Tsu would keep perfect composure, often not even looking at her as they talked. She'd always had a good gauge of what Tsu could take, what she was comfortable handling. So what was this . . . ?

There was a knock at the door a minute or so after Tsu left. Ochaco wiped the tears off her face and walked over, taking a deep breath to look normal before opening it. She found Mina Ashido on the other side, smiling brightly.

"Yo!, everything good? Tsuyu just bolted out of your room all of a sudden so. I'd guess not."

Even when showing concern, Mina rarely let her smile slip. It was, perhaps, the one trait of being a hero she had perfected sooner than her classmates - or perhaps it was just her disposition. Ochaco hadn't been able to figure out which yet.

With the conversation immediately turned back on Tsu, Ochaco had to screw up her face to keep from crying and just say, "Yeah, sorry. I kind of just told her that I might like someone, and she got mad at me? I think? Because she doesn't think I should be** friends** with them."

"Oh wow." Mina looked down the hallway towards Tsu's room. "Huh. I never took Tsuyu as the **jealous girlfriend** type."

"**Girl . . . friend**?"

"Yeah." Mina quirked her head to the side. "She's jealous because you like someone else, right?"

It felt like they were having two different conversations with two invisible conversation partners. _What is Mina even saying?_

"What . . .? Someone else? Other than Deku . . .?"

Even looking entirely baffled, Mina still managed to smile. "No . . . I mean her . . ." she pointed down the hallway. "You know, Tsuyu."

She turned her pointing at Ochaco. "You two _are_ **dating**, right?"

Ochaco's eyes went buggy. _Why would she think that?!_

"What?! No, what? **I don't even like girls.**"

_Toga._

"- I mean, I don't think so," she tacked on, just in case.

"Oh!" Mina blinked several times, and the smile on her face slipped. "Are you like, _sure_? I think this is a conversation we should have in your room," she added, pointing inside. "Or maybe my room prefer, but I think we should talk."

Ochaco glanced back into her bedroom. Despite the fact that she felt like it was messy, there wasn't actually enough in it to really warrant concern over Mina seeing it. Not to mention that Mina's room was even messier, from what little she'd seen of it.

"Umm . . . no, that's - here, come in," she said, letting Mina in and closing the door behind her.

Mina sat on the chair in the center of the room while Ochaco sat on her bed.

Mina said, "Okay, just, first thing - how are you doing? You seem pretty shook up about the fight. Do you need anything?"

_Great question._ There was a numbness to shock, and that was mostly where she was right now.

"I'm . . . I was pretty upset, but now I'm just confused?" The real question, "Why did you think Tsu was my **girlfriend**?"

"You sure you don't want, like, tea or something?"

Ochaco glanced at her tea beside the laptop Tsu left, and Tsu's on the other side of it.

"I have tea . . . it's cold now."

"Well, why don't we both have hot tea? Here, I'll handle it," she said, snatching Ochaco's cup up before going to the little stove Ochaco kept in the corner of her room.

There were too many questions racing through Ochaco's mind during the pause to actually come up with anything to say, and neither of them spoke until Mina had the tea hot again.

Mina handed her the cup of tea and said, "Okay. So let me get this straight. Tsuyu got upset when you brought up **someone you like** who is not Izuku. You're **not** **dating** either Tsuyu or Izuku, but you do _like_ him. And you're . . . **straight?**" It was obvious from her tone that it was only the last point that she was incredulous of.

"I . . . think so? I don't know if I really like this person though, and that might _not_ be exactly what made Tsu upset. She _did_ say she didn't think we should be **friends** though."

Mina was dragging her fingers over the big row of tea packets Ochaco had managed to accrue since living on her own, looking for something to drink.

She said, "So, tell me about **this person you maybe like** that Tsuyu dislikes so much."

"Um . . . hm. Well. It's - I mean." She sighed. There wasn't really a way to get around the obvious problem. "I guess the thing Tsu probably has an issue with is that she's part of the League of Villains."

Mina laughed, warm and cheery, until she glanced over her shoulder and saw Ochaco's dead expression - that immediately cut her off. She turned around to face her, a grin growing rapidly on her face, putting her hands together as if in prayer over her mouth. It was obvious she was choosing her words carefully, but Ochaco couldn't tell why she looked so _delighted._ Even she could admit, Toga being a villain was obviously a bad thing!

Mina said, "So, um, she's a girl." She snorted, but held her composure. "An _evil_ girl?"

"I guess so."

Mina bowed her head down against her hands, stifling a laugh. Not that the attempt did very much - she busted out laughing so loud it made Ochaco flinch, and just kept laughing until she doubled over, and her face flushed an even darker purple.

Ochaco's own blush was just from humiliation, and she curled up, holding her legs as close to her body as she could.

"That's awesome!" Mina said, as her laughter subsided. "That's literally the best thing I've ever heard. **You're straight?**"

She got where Mina was coming from on this one, but, "I mean, I think so! **I like boys!** I've always liked boys. And **Toga isn't exactly a normal girl**, so . . ."

Mina's expression flowed quickly from confusion, to shock, to realization, and then finally settling back into her grin. If anything, she looked even more satisfied with herself this time.

"Okay. I think I have figured out what's going on here. Let me just . . ." The kettle had started whistling, so she pulled it off and poured it into her cup. The smell of vanilla plum followed seconds later.

Mina sat back down in the chair, but rolled it a little closer to Ochaco. After a moment of just steeping her tea, she said, "Okay. So. **You like boys.**"

"Yeah."

"And **you like this girl** Toga, at least a little bit probably?"

"I think so. It doesn't feel the same, but it feels . . . good."

Mina nodded, still smiling so bright. At least she wasn't laughing anymore.

"So, here's the deal. You can like **boys ****_and_**** girls**. You don't have to like them the same way, or the same amount. You can just **like what you like**."

_What._

Ochaco took a few seconds to put together a very sophisticated, "It's not that easy," in response. 'It,' in this case, probably meant 'Life,' or 'Love,' or 'Literally Anything.'

That response didn't phase Mina. "Nope! **It's not easy, but it is!** A thing, I mean."

Mina seemed very confident about all of this, but Ochaco couldn't see how that could be. The only explanation she could come up with was . . .

"Um, Mina. I don't want to be rude, but do _you_ like girls?"

To her surprise, Mina leaned back against the chair, putting a finger to her chin in thought. "Hmm," she hummed for a second, "well, **I prefer boys.**"

_Alright, then-_

"-but **I'm not opposed to girls**," she added with a sly wink, all of the thoughtfulness turned facetious.

_. . . What._

Mina added, "**I just like hot people!**" with no small amount of glee.

_Hold on. Hold on hold on hold on a second. Back up a step._

"So you're saying . . .** if I like Deku, and I do actually like Toga**, but I like them differently, that's . . . **normal?**"

"_I_ think so!" Mina exclaimed, leaning forward in the seat again until she was nearly head-height with Ochaco. This was the moment where her unflagging smile came in handy - it made it so much easier to believe her dramatic statements, even if Ochaco also kind of didn't believe them.

"Well," she continued, "I don't think it's weird to like Toga given that she's a girl, but the ev-" she backed up a tiny bit, squinting. "Wait, sorry - what's she look like by the way?"

Ochaco scratched the side of her head. Too much detail would sound weird, so she just went for, "She's, um, blonde, our age-ish. . ." There was no recognition on Mina's face, because that description meant nothing, and the more specific details would probably make her sound a lot scarier than she was. Or, scarier than she _looked_.

"Here . . ." Ochaco said, pulling up Toga's pictures in her phone and turning it around so Mina could look.

She leaned and squinted even more if possible - Ochaco's little flip phone wasn't exactly the best for looking at pictures. Ochaco pressed the direction key to scroll between photos.

After looking at just three, Mina sat back up in the chair and said, "Yeah, no, you're good," with complete confidence. "_Sucks_ that she's evil. The League, really?"

Ochaco nodded "Yeah . . . she attacked me and Tsu during the training camp, actually, so she must have been-"

She cut off as Mina covered her mouth, barely avoiding spitting out tea. After a moment of concern, Mina managed to _not_ choke and die, and she was right back to smiling.

"Wow," she said, "that's so much worse than I thought, okay."

Beat.

"The good news is, I know why Tsu is mad!" She held up a finger, then dramatically frowned. "The bad news is why she's mad." She held up two fingers with the biggest sad face in the world.

"Because Toga attacked us?" This conversation _had_ provided some context for how ridiculous having a crush on her really was, in absence of all that extraneous detail about Toga 'being in love with her' and everything.

"Nope!" The switch that operated Mina's smile turned back on. ". . . I mean, that can't help, but still."

Ochaco tilted her head curiously. _Where is this going, then?_

"Oh?"

Mina's smile relaxed a little, and her face betrayed real concern - or maybe pity.

She said, "I mean, it kinda looks like you'd prefer _anyone_ over her." It was phrased like an observation, but Mina didn't betray any doubt.

"Wh . . ." Ochaco trailed off without finishing her question.

_"It kinda looks like you'd prefer anyone over her - Like you'd prefer anyone over her - You'd prefer anyone over her - Anyone over her - Anyone over her."_

_Mina thought we were dating. She thought we'd been dating this whole time. '__**Jealous girlfriend,'**__ she said. __**'Girlfriend.'**__ 'Anyone over her.' That must mean . . ._

"Are you saying . . . that Tsu has feelings for me, too?"

Yeah. Mina might have been smiling, but that look on her face? That was pity. She leaned forward, elbow on the chair arm and her chin held up by the palm of her hand.

"I'm saying she's _in love with you._ Like, I could be wrong - clearly I was misinterpreting some stuff - but. Yeah. I'm pretty sure I'm not."

A long moment passed in silence, and for some reason, Mina stopped smiling entirely. It wasn't until a few seconds later that Ochaco realized she was crying again, tears already on her face.

"No . . ." she murmured. "That can't be true. It can't-" she cut off as the tears wouldn't stop and she covered her mouth in horror. That was the worst version of this fight. This was something she had no idea how to apologize for. This was a mistake she'd made dozens of times without ever saying 'sorry.'

Mina took a sip of her tea before getting out of the seat, crouching down in front of Ochaco so they were, finally, at the same height.

She said, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry. This is probably too much for one conversation, huh?"

"That's not it."

Mina quirked an eyebrow.

"I mean, it is," Ochaco corrected, letting her hand fall away from her mouth. "This is all way, way too much. But the worst thing is . . . I never noticed Tsu's feelings. If she really loves me, I should have realized it sooner. I should have said something."

Mina poked her knee, just trying to get her attention. "Hey now. If you thought **you only liked boys** this whole time, she probably did too."

"Does that make a difference?"

Mina glanced around awkwardly, as if she were making eye contact with an imaginary audience.

"Um. Yeah. Trust me."

Ochaco rested her head against the wall, and, upon realizing that the tears had suddenly stopped, did her best to clean her face with her sleeve. It was a good thing Mina was so easy to believe in.

She asked, ". . . so what am I supposed to do now?"

"I don't think it's a great idea for you to make _any_ decision right now. Except, maybe - do you want a hug?"

Mina gave excellent hugs, and at virtually any time Ochaco would be grateful for them. But right now, the sheer idea of being touched felt awful.

"Actually . . . I think I want to be alone for a while."

Mina's smile returned in a flash as she stood up. "Good deal. Later, if you feel like celebrating being **ambivalently not-straight**, just let me know. It's always good to have more girls in the club."

_The . . . club?_

_I can't unpack that right_ now.

"Thanks, Mina."

Mina chugged the rest of her tea and left the cup on the table before heading for the door. She paused with with her hand on the doorknob.

She took a few seconds to consider something, then feigned as if a thought had just struck her. "Oh, Ochaco, a word of advice?"

She only got a blank look in response. Somehow, that was enough to draw out a bigger smile.

"No matter how cute they are, **no villain is worth Tsuyu**. Not even close."

And she left.

* * *

**Ochaco, December 22, 7:45pm**

She was drowning in stress, so rather than stay in her room and boil to death in that stress, Ochaco went to the gym. If you ran long enough and lifted heavy enough weighs, soon enough your body would lose its ability to be stressed. She wished desperately that she had a phone she could listen to music on without a big hassle, anything to create distracting noise, but she was stuck repeating the same few thoughts and searching for solutions in a situation that felt impossible to win.

Several other people came into the gym while she was working out, but she must have been radiating her frustrations in an aura, because everyone turned around and left after a few minutes - even Deku.

At the end of her workout, Ochaco was struggling for air and her legs felt disconnected from her body, like she was floating. Her fingers had lost a lot of their dexterity, so it took her a while to type out the text she'd spent over two hours trying to think up.

**Uraraka:** Toga, I don't think we should message each other anymore.

And as soon as the message was sent, she turned her phone off. She'd have to handle the rest in person.


	6. Holiday

**Summary: **Ochaco has some heavy talks with **her two best friends**. She spends Christmas with her **family**, and plans to spend her birthday with Tsuyu.

* * *

The last thing Ochaco did on the 22nd was go to the mall and purchase a box of chocolates and new-scented everything. It was a bit of a risk trying to get Tsu a **gift** when she might be leaving right after class tomorrow, but she would just have to make it work.

* * *

**Ochaco, December 23, 4:10pm**

As soon as she was sure Deku would be back in his room, Ochaco knocked on his door. He appeared a second later, still dressed in his uniform.

"Oh, hey Uraraka. It - it is you, right?" He went straight to sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck before she'd even gotten to say anything. Knowing a shape-shifter was stalking him was probably starting to get to his head.

She just held up her arms like a zombie. "Hug me."

"Oh?- OK!"

He held his arms almost as awkwardly, and they stepped together, his arms around her shoulders and hers around his waist. He smelled way too much like orange citrus, which was, to be fair, the point. Definitely Izuku - not that she'd doubted it, really.

He said, "Oh, lavender?"

It was far from a complete question, but once they stepped back from each other, she nodded. "Yeah. I thought it was about time to make good on my countermeasures."

"Huh, I thought - er, do you want to come inside?" He gestured inside his room. "In case people are listening."

She hadn't been in his room since they did the dorm room competition, and that felt distinctly . . . different. But she didn't technically have anything against being alone in his room (kind of the opposite, actually), so she just smiled and said, "Thanks for having me," before stepping inside.

It was as bizarre as she remembered, and just as neatly organized as it had been during the competition. The shelves filled with All Might merch hadn't gotten dusty, the bed was neatly made, and the only real signs that an actual person lived in here were the laundry hamper and the desk with papers scattered over it. It also didn't smell objectionable in the way that a lot of boy's rooms did, so that made it almost nice! . . . if only there weren't a life-sized All Might doll staring right at her.

It was all double-weird given that All Might didn't look like any of these figurines anymore.

Deku closed the door almost-but-not-quite-all-the-way shut, and when she gave him a curious look, he just said, "Oh, **sorry**, it was a rule at my house that I couldn't have a girl in my room with the door closed. Not that I . . . ever had a girl over."

It wasn't entirely clear if he was embarrassed at never having a girl over, embarrassed about the rule, or he was worried she was going to be **jealous** at the hypothetical girl who may have once been in his room without the door closed. Which was silly - Ochaco had never been _that_ **jealous**.

"Do you . . . _want_ me to close it?" he asked.

She put on just as bashful of an expression, even though she had to fake it. "If you wouldn't mind, that would be good."

He nodded, closed the door, and sat down at his desk. That only left his bed for her to sit on, so she did just that. She tried _not_ to imagine where being a little more aggressive in this situation could get her, but for some reason that rule he had - and the fact that he immediately violated it - made it difficult not to think about.

Luckily, he said something before too long: "I'm a little surprised you went through the trouble. I thought you and Toga were really getting along."

She blinked a few times in surprise. He was surprisingly out-of-the-loop, at least according to the pace she was used to getting updates from Toga.

"She didn't tell you?"

He just shrugged.

"I told her to stop texting me. Tsu pointed out how much trouble I might be getting myself into, being **friends** with her, and I guess I'm taking it to heart."

"Oh, that's good!" He looked visibly relieved for a second, then frowned. "I'm . . . going to keep talking to her, at least until I can figure out something about the League."

"Yeah, that's **smart.**"

A lull grew. Talking about Toga was . . . difficult, but she was an impossible topic to avoid at this point. They had taken so many risks together to try to capture her or get information from her, but the only thing they'd learned was that, despite all of her wickedness, Toga was still human, virtually normal when she wasn't actively being a villain. What were they supposed to do with information like that?

_And he can't be having much more luck than me finding anything out about the League. Maybe that's _not_ the real reason he's doing this. Maybe I'm not the only one who started to fall for it._

She couldn't quite figure out what 'it' was, but if she had to take a guess, she'd probably have to say it was, 'Toga is a very pretty girl,' or something like that. She was surprised to find that her **jealousy** didn't flare up like it usually did at the thought of Deku being taken in by a pretty girl - probably because something about Toga's prettiness felt like a trick. Something anyone could fall for. _At least, I hope 'anyone.'_

Uraraka looked around the room instead of at Deku, and he was mostly looking at his hands instead of her. Eventually, though, someone was going to have to say something. It might as well be her.

She said, "This is going to be . . . kind of an awkward question, but I've gotta ask: do you like Toga? Like, as a girl."

His brow furrowed. "You mean like, a crush? Absolutely not." His lack of hesitation caught her off-guard, but he just continued; "I think she's interesting - she has a much deeper grasp on certain, like, ideas than I'm used to."

_Oof._ She had, without quite realizing it, been bracing herself to hear that he found her hot, and tempering her feelings around that. But finding her _interesting_ because of her _ideas_ was a different matter entirely. What ideas did she have that were so interesting? And why hadn't she been talking to Ochaco about them, if these were just interesting ideas she had?

He didn't stop there, though. "But, as a girl? she . . . kinda scares me. More than other girls, I mean," he said, chuckling nervously.

And for all her racing thoughts about his previous comments, she had to giggle at that. "I mean, I hope so. Her teeth are like _razors; _it's spooky."

That brow-furrowing concern on his face deepened despite the joke. "I don't mean her quirk."

His tone was scolding, and that put her in a place where she had no idea what to feel or how to respond. They had gotten into this whole mess because of Toga's quirk - of course it was scary! Why would he defend _that_ and just that? What was even going on in this conversation?

He shook his head, and his tone went back to normal. "But, to answer your question, no, I don't like her as a girl."

Before she even realized she was going to say it, "Do you still like me?" came spilling out of her mouth. A blush followed immediately afterwards - _Could I have picked a worse time to ask?!_

His eyes went wide with surprise. "Oh, absolutely!" And his enthusiasm immediately thawed out humiliation.

"I know we've been busy, but I still . . ." he trailed off, apparently losing whatever burst of confidence he'd had.

She leaned forward, folding her hands under her chin and smiling. "Good. Because none of this stuff that's been going on has changed how I feel about you-"

"Oh," he said, visibly relaxing.

"-. . . but it kinda has changed how I feel about myself?"

"Oh?"

This was what she'd spent her whole gym session obsessing over, but that didn't make it much easier to articulate: "Yesterday, I kind of realized that I . . . _really_ like **attention**. I like being liked so much, it made me ignore just about everything else about Toga so she'd keep paying **attention** to me."

She winced, as if accused by the things she herself was saying. He did too, to be fair.

She continued, "I knew I wasn't getting any useful information out of her, but I liked her company. A lot."

He probably wasn't reading the subtext again, because this didn't seem to surprise him at all. He said, "It's hard not to like being liked. And Toga especially is very-"

"Cute?" She recognized immediately that she could have just waited for him to finish, wincing again.

"-. . . I was just going to say 'straight-forward.' I guess she's cute too? Which can't help. Or hurt, depending on how you look at it."

She hadn't ever seen Deku feign disinterest, so she didn't _think_ that that was what was happening. Had he really only recognized that Toga was so attractive as a passing detail? Was it that _easy_ for him? And was all the fluster he showed around other girls, like Hatsume, just because they were _near_ him, not because he found them cute?

Ochaco was getting the impression that she'd been mis-reading his body language literally the entire time they'd known each other, and that made her feel deeply stupid.

She lay back on his bed, not thinking for a moment about the fact that it was his bed and that was probably not an appropriate thing to do.

"I think I learned something else about myself, too," she said.

"What's that?"

"I think** I have a crush on her**. Toga, I mean. **_As_**** Toga**. As a girl."

Yesterday, it would have been impossible to actually get those words out, and she was more afraid of the idea that Deku would find this weird than she was willing to admit. She convinced herself that there was no way past her problems but through them, so she was just going to have to bulldoze and look at the wreckage from the other side.

"Oh," he said.

Beat.

"Oh! I . . . see."

Another pause. Ochaco braced herself.

He asked, "So is she . . . the first girl you've ever liked?"

_Oh. That's pretty much fine._

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure. And you're the first boy I've ever seriously liked, either, so you can imagine the kind of month it's been for me."

_We're just talking. Is this fine? Is he just fine?_

"Wow," he said, leaning back in his chair. "I guess, wow, yeah. December has been intense for me, but at least I haven't had to deal with a realization like that."

Beat.

"I mean . . ."

_You mean? _What_ do you mean?_

His hesitation just trailed into silence, so she prompted him with a little, "Hm?"

"I guess what I mean is... I didn't just figure that out, but. I do also like** girls and boys both**. I've just known that for a long time."

_Oh._

She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, too tired to feel like sitting up. When she saw his face and could be sure what he was saying was in earnest, tension she didn't even know she was holding in her muscles all started to relax. It was okay.

She had thought that liking Toga would mean, in one sense or another, feeling alone. But somehow, even after cutting communication between them, she was actually starting to feel less alone than she had before.

"You too, huh? . . . maybe I just didn't really get how the world worked."

He didn't say anything in reply - blissfully, because she had far too much talking going on in her head already. It was so tempting to just dump all of her complicated feelings on him all at once, but that was not what their relationship had been or was. Instead, she just tried to figure out how to summarize it, letting minutes tick by in silence.

"I used to think - I mean, until like, yesterday I thought - that basically everyone was a girl who liked boys or a boy who liked girls. And then there were some people who were girls who liked girls and boys who liked boys, and it was **obvious** who was who. But now I think maybe that was all wrong, and just... I hadn't asked? Because it's not like we're the only ones. Toga likes you, and she likes me. And Mina told me she likes boys but she isn't 'opposed' to girls, so I think she's **like us**, too."

Deku scratched the side of his head, but his face told her he was pondering, not anxious.

He said, "I can't really say. I didn't have a very good idea of how people or romance worked in middle school . . . and I haven't exactly improved much on the romance front. I think the one thing I can say is that someone's feelings only totally make sense to them - I don't think there's **real, clear-cut lines** along which we can all be sorted. I used to just think that about romance, but I think . . . Toga's been showing me how that applies to a lot of other things, too."

She wasn't sure what to make of any of that. Only making total sense to yourself sounded so lonely, and lines between types of people helped the world make sense. Sorting out romance person-to-person at least made enough sense - you only have to understand one other person as well as you can. But other stuff? _What other stuff?_

But all she said was, "Toga's** smart**." Because at least she knew she believed that.

"Really **smart**," he said. "**Maybe smarter** than us, in some ways."

_. . . that's not like him to say._ Deku had always been one to admit when others were stronger, but she couldn't remember a time when he'd said someone was **smarter**. _She_ hadn't gotten that impression from Toga - what kind of conversations were those two having?

She said, "But I still don't think we can be **friends** with her. Not for real. Not if she's **hurting** people."

"Mm," he agreed. Then, "Yeah. I think you're right."

She almost hoped he wouldn't agree. Deku didn't like to give up. If he didn't see a way to make this work, what were the odds some way actually existed? And she disliked hearing that more than she expected.

"That makes me . . . sad," she said, determined not to cry any more.

"Yeah. Me too."

More silence.

Back in middle and elementary school, Ochaco's **friends** had been like her - talkative, prone to blurting out what was on their mind, and laid-back. Now that she was in high school, **her two closest friends** were such quiet, thoughtful people. She spent a lot of time wondering what was going on in their heads, but even trying, she more often couldn't predict what they'd say than could. And if she couldn't figure that out, probably no one could - no one, she thought, put in the effort that she did.

But Mina had come along and read her and Tsu's feelings so easily. And Toga, despite having encountered her and Deku only briefly, seemed to have a better grasp of their thoughts and behaviors than they did of each other. What did those two have that she was missing? Why couldn't she read Tsu or Deku no matter how much she studied them - their expressions, their tics, the way they talked?

_Maybe I'm not missing anything. Maybe there's a part of me getting in the way of me understanding._

She sighed, hoping to dispel the thought. She couldn't stand the thought of losing anything more - she just wanted to get back what she'd lost.

"Tsu and I got into a fight," she said.

"Oh, I'm **sorry**. What happened?"

"Well . . . she pointed out that Toga and I were getting kind of close. And I got defensive, and she asked if I liked Toga, and . . . I couldn't say 'no.' Or I said 'maybe.' And she got really upset and left the room without saying anything, and we haven't talked since."

"Oh, jeeze. That's especially rough - you guys are like, **best friends**. Do you know why she got so upset?"

_Because she loves me, according to Mina._

"Mm. I think she just wants to protect me."

She didn't want to say anything until she knew for certain that Tsu had feelings for her. It would only make things super weird between all of them if she was wrong (and maybe if she was right, too). And, selfishly, a part of her didn't want Deku to know. Maybe it would make him withdraw his own affections. Maybe it was best if she was the only one who knew the truth for sure.

"That . . . makes sense," he said. Clearly struggling to pick out his words, he continued, "How are you . . . feeling? about that?

He was **obviously** uncomfortable in this sort of messy emotional gray area, but she appreciated the effort.

_Like I should have known more than Mina. Like I should have considered this. Like I've__** hurt**__ her and I hate that so much!_

The words for what she was feeling weren't coming easy.

"Overwhelmed. Scared, I guess? I mean, that's the other reason I told Toga to stop texting me . . . I want Tsu to know that a crush doesn't come first. I'm not sure what else to do."

"Hmm." He turned such that she couldn't quite see his face out of the corner of her eye anymore, but if she had to guess, he was doing his 'analyze-the-situation' face. She'd know they were in trouble if he started muttering to himself.

Luckily, he just said, "How about talking to her? Tsu, I mean."

She winced. "I mean, I will. I'm just scared that that can't take the **hurt** away. I don't know if this is the kind of fight where we're **friends** again the next day, or where we trust each other less afterwards."

Another long break while he thought.

Eventually, he sighed and said, "I don't know - I'm **sorry**, I don't know what to say. This is . . . deeper than I understand, I think."

There was actually something satisfying about hitting a wall Deku didn't know how to get over. Of course, he didn't have all of the context, so he was at a disadvantage to begin with, but it was good to feel like their strengths were complementary, instead of his simply overwhelming hers.

"That's okay, Deku. I just really needed to talk about it; I don't need you to have solutions or strategies for me."

He chuckled nervously - more head-scratching. "I kinda feel like that's all I'm good at, though . . ."

_Oh, Deku. Beneath it all you are kind of an idiot._

She sat up, sweeping her hair off her forehead, and shook her head. "No, that's not all you're good at. Trust me."

They exchanged short, but warm smiles. Being (mostly) honest with your crush was tough, but it left her liking him even more. Was this what dating was like, or would be like? Could they be **like friends**, but **closer friends?** **Friends** who **hold hands**, and **kiss**, and -

She cleared the thought just by breaking eye contact with him. Dating wasn't what she needed to be thinking about right now.

She said, "I think I'm going to go talk to Tsu later this evening if she's still here. I don't really feel like . . . doing school work, or thinking about dating, or doing anything until I know if we're still **friends**."

He nodded, but since she broke eye contact, he was just looking at the floor. Was that disappointment? Could he feel, in that same visceral way, what not-dating meant giving up, even in this exact moment?

_Who says I have to give it _all_ up?_

She swallowed, laughing nervously just like he would to fill the silence, but now that she'd let the thought in, she couldn't get rid of it. She could get rid of it if she could counter it - but she couldn't! The thing she wanted right now wouldn't endanger anything with Tsu (especially if she didn't mention it). There was nothing and no one saying this was off-limits so long as he said 'yes.'

"I know I literally just said I don't feel like dating right now, but if you'd be up for it, I think I might like my first kiss right about now."

The surprise on his face was enough reward that she could feel satisfied just by asking.

He asked, "Oh, uh, really?"

She nodded, and he jumped out of his chair so fast she was afraid he'd trip over himself. It was cute (_he is so freaking cute!_), and that was all the more reason she really needed to kiss him.

They were pretty awkward about stepping close to each other, but as soon as he was close enough, she reached out slowly and wrapped her arms around his neck, stepping close. Very close. In all the fighting and protecting each other, had they ever let themselves get this close?

She leaned in and kissed him without any more ceremony - she was tired of waiting for this. It was soft, and warm, and also pretty awkward as they both tried to figure out how to move their lips. He got nervous and tried to apologize after about ten seconds of messy attempts, but she wasn't having it; she shushed him with more kisses until it felt like they were doing it right, until it really set in how much she liked it. And how, if she didn't cut herself off now, she wasn't going to be leaving this room before embarrassing herself in some way.

They gave each other a big hug when it was over, and she sighed nestled against his neck. He smelled like a very confusing mix of body spray and orange citrus, which didn't exactly match well, but the confidence that it was really him, and that he'd taken her idea to heart, still made her heart fill full. _This_ was the boy she liked.

"Keep using the lotion," she said. "I want to know for sure it's you when we do that again."

More nervous laughter. It wasn't like she could blame him for feeling nervous, given how she could hear his heartbeat racing. It was more satisfying than anything, knowing that she could do that.

"I can do that. And, um, thank you. For that."

_Is this dork thanking me for kissing him?_ (▰˘◡˘▰)

She leaned back away from him, now beaming. "Any time. Except right now, I guess, given my embargo on dating stuff. Starting . . . now," she said, stepping out of their hug.

"I'll see you around, Deku."

"Yeah."

Once she was out of his room, it dawned on her how much less romantic that had been than the first kiss she wanted, that she fantasized about. This had just been something she could control, something with the person she liked and where liking him was okay. Even unprompted and awkward, that made it good - at least in her eyes.

_Now . . . no more avoiding it. Talk to Tsu._

She grabbed the box of chocolates from her room and headed over.

* * *

Tsu opened her door but didn't say anything immediately. She stood there with her finger to her chin, posture perhaps more drooping than normal.

Ochaco bowed her head. "I am so **sorry** about yesterday. I come bearing chocolates from the mall as well as a promise that I will say **'I'm sorry**,' as many times as you want."

Tsu stared at her for a long moment, then turned to look inside her room. Finally, she stepped out of the doorway without any further comment, which Ochaco took as an invitation.

The room was as beautiful and bizarre as always. The walls were covered with posters and paintings of idyllic countrysides, riverbeds, and rural towns, all laminated or carefully sealed behind plastic and glass. Two humidifiers were running - one constantly billowing steam, the other giving off a thin stream of a sweet scent. Every entire floor space was covered with rugs or furniture, even though Tsu took pains to keep it clean and easy to move through. A speaker set up next to the bed played a constant loop of river and rain sounds with occasional snippets of activity from wildlife. There was nowhere in UA half as relaxing as Tsu's room, nor anywhere half as humid.

A small kotatsu table that Tsu used as a desk sat along one edge of the room, and Ochaco put the chocolates on it and sat down; in the middle of winter, where else would they be having a conversation like this?

Tsu remained standing even after it was clear where Ochaco was sitting, so she prompted, "Why don't you sit with me?"

And she did, sitting cross-legged with her hands in her lap, still not saying anything. It was hard to guess whether that was because she didn't have anything to say to her, or if, in her search to find the right thing to say, she was just looping without a solution.

Ochaco was going to have to give her something to work with either way.

She said, "Not much has happened since yesterday, but it feels like a lot has, so I just want to explain."

A pause went on for several seconds before Tsu nodded.

She continued, "I am no longer texting Toga. I also think I may be more interested in other girls than I . . . thought? I guess that was obvious, though." She tucked a tuft of hair behind her ear, trying to predict the questions in Tsu's head.

Tsu spoke before she could manage it.

"You don't have to explain. As long as you're keeping yourself safe, I don't need to know the rest."

And Ochaco's methodical thinking method slipped away in a breath; "But I want to talk to you! And I hope you'll talk to me."

"Okay," Tsu said.

Unlike with Deku, Ochaco was pretty sure she could just say all the stuff she'd been thinking and Tsu would be able to make sense of it, so she just went for it.

"I didn't really have crushes before high school, and I guess I thought liking girls was . . . weirder? than it is. More _**obvious**._ But it turns out that's not the case. It looks like . . . like I probably wouldn't even notice if a girl liked other girls or not."

And because Ochaco never quite knew what Tsu was thinking, she wasn't prepared for her to say. "I love you, Ochaco."

_There it is. That's . . . it. Just that easy._

Ochaco nodded, somehow both more anxious and more relaxed at the same time. "I know. Or, Mina told me."

Tsu placed her finger on her chin. "I've told you before, but you never understood. And I was too afraid to insist."

Tsu had such a remarkable talent for just putting everything out there. Ochaco could never be grateful enough for that. After years and years and so many friendships where being totally honest never felt like an option, Tsu was a blessing whenever she spoke.

"I get that now. I'm **sorry** it took me so long. - And that's why I brought chocolates!-" she said, opening the box and setting it between them. "I thought we could eat our feelings."

Tsu was quick to get up and grab herself some chopsticks, and she didn't hesitate to just grab one. She didn't say anything more, either, which prompted Ochaco to do so instead.

"Just to be totally clear, you mean the type of love that makes you want to date me, right?"

Tsu swallowed the chocolate she was chewing, but she didn't even need to think about her answer: "I love you like you're my **family**. And also . . . yes."

And Ochaco immediately started to tear up. Luckily, she'd predicted this was going to happen, and brought tissues in her bag - she busted them out with further ado.

"**Sorry,**" she said, and explained, "I've kind of been crying since yesterday so this just happens at the drop of a hat?"

She dabbed at her eyes with the tissue and took a deep breath. She knew this was going to happen. She just needed to get through it. Talk to Tsu.

"Okay, um. I . . . love you too, Tsu. Like **family**. But I don't think my feelings are romantic. And I . . . don't think they're _going_ to be."

"I know," Tsu said. She was replying so quickly that Ochaco had to wonder if she'd been thinking about this conversation as much in advance as she had been.

She continued, "And I'm not mad, and I don't need you to say '**sorry**.' I had already accepted that before."

Tsu held a piece of chocolate aloft as if considering it. She said, "I just felt like there must be something **wrong** with me." She blinked a few times, then plopped the chocolate in her mouth.

There was a pang in Ochaco's heart like her heart was being squeezed, or like she was on the upside-down of a roller coaster, or like she'd failed her **best friend**.

"Oh, Tsu, no."

Tsu finished her chocolate before saying, "I know. It was just a mean thought I had. I know it's not that simple."

Ochaco decided it was also time for her to eat her feelings, so she grabbed a chocolate she hoped had caramel in it and bit in. No caramel. Nougat.

She was still chewing when Tsu asked, "Did you stop texting Toga because of me?"

Ochaco swallowed, hesitated on the answer (even though she already knew it), then said, "Yes . . . and no. Mina came to talk to me after you left yesterday, and she helped me realize that what I was feeling was a crush. And if it's just a crush . . ."

She searched for the right words, the right way to say that she knew a crush was less important than what she'd been blowing up her connection to Toga to mean.

But all she could think of were Mina's words. "It's not worth you. You're my **family**, and she's just . . . a pretty girl."

Tsu was being more careful now, scanning over the box of chocolates, probably just hoping to avoid anything with fruit filling. She really wasn't a big fan of fruit.

She said, "I wasn't going to stop being your **friend** because of her. Even if it became something more, I wasn't going to abandon you. I . . . don't want you to resent me."

Ochaco shook her head. "Never."

_I won't be the one to __**hurt**__ you like that. Not ever. You're my __**best friend**__, Tsu . . ._

_I've got to be yours._

There was a long pause while they both listened only to the sounds of rain and their own thoughts.

Eventually, Tsu said, "I'm **sorry** that this was how you found out you **like girls**. I would have liked to have reacted better."

Ochaco finally cracked a smile and shrugged. "I think it could have gone a little smoother on my end, too."

Another pause started, but she didn't want to let this was set in.

"Um, if it's okay to ask, how did _you _find out you **like girls**?"

A few seconds of blinking from Tsu. Apparently, that wasn't as easy to answer.

She said, "I don't think I want to talk about that right now."

Ochaco flushed from embarrassment but just nodded. She was determined not to push anywhere uncomfortable today. "Okay."

And the quiet came back whether she wanted it to or not.

It didn't take long for them to polish off a good half of the box of chocolates, and by the time they had, as predicted, Ochaco was feeling a little better.

_Maybe it's time to transition to small talk._

"It's Christmas Eve-Eve - I'm surprised you're not back home yet. What's up?"

"Samidare and Satsuki got out of school a few days before we did, so they went on a little trip with my parents. They should be picking me up in a few hours."

"That's good!" (✿◠‿◠) "I hope you have a happy Christmas."

"I hope you have a good Christmas too, Ochaco.

* * *

**Ochaco, December 25 (Christmas), 6:30am**

And she _did_ have a good Christmas. Or, at least, it looked like she was going to. Her parents had done a little less decorating and much less shopping without her living there regularly, but Christmas Eve had already been good.

_Things sure have changed this __**past year.**_

She used to struggle to get up in the morning every break, rarely up before 10:00am regardless of when she went to bed. Now, she was probably up earlier than her parents. The onsie she wore throughout middle school didn't fit anymore (she was stuck wearing boxers to bed, and you couldn't wear those straight out of bed until you had to leave the house on Christmas). She'd had her first crush - on a boy and a girl each. She'd had her first kiss, her first fist-fight, her first appearance as Uravity. She had used to wonder, when people told her that life started to move faster as you got older, when she would first notice that happening.

And that day was today.

Becoming a Hero had meant taking everything about her that wasn't strong enough and recycling it into something better. Her body, her mind, her spirit, her goals, her aspirations, her quirk. Her heart. All of it was almost unrecognizable now. And it would all continue to change until there was no part left of her that could be broken.

_This is what it's like once you've gone beyond, huh?_

She turned her phone back on after three days of keeping it off, and 45 text messages rolled in. 42 of those were from Toga. She glanced through them briefly - the vast majority of them either looked like attempts at making small talk or photos with cute captions. A few asked where she'd gone, but those were always followed soon enough with more messages acting completely normal. There was only one message where Toga clearly indicated that she knew what Ochaco had sent her. The one that had come only three minutes after.

**Uraraka:** Toga, I don't think we should message each other anymore.

**Toga: **what do you mean?

Of all the things she'd expected to feel reading these messages, she hadn't expected pity. She'd recognized how much she liked Toga's **attention**, how much she'd craved it in the days since, but she hadn't really considered how much Toga must have liked _hers._ For as desperate as Ochaco had felt, Toga must have been that much worse.

She sent back the following.

**Uraraka: **Hi there toga. I've decided not to text you anymore, because I can't be **friends** with someone who is involved in the league of villains. They've** hurt** me and my friends. I know someday soon you'll do it again.  
Please get out of there while you still can. I may not be your **friend**, but I still don't want you to get **hurt**.  
I'm blocking you now, and i'll block whatever new phone you get in a few days. Goodbye.

* * *

**Ochaco, December 27 (Ochaco's Birthday), 12:00pm**

Two days later, Ochaco was getting suited up to go out for one of her birthday rituals: thrifting. Her parents and other relatives would give her whatever money they could spare, and she'd spend hours traveling around with **friends**, picking up clothes, accessories, backpacks, or anything else she wanted for a few hundred yen at most. She'd come home at the end of the day with bags filled with stuff like a wealthy socialite, and that was the stuff she'd live with for the **next year** at least. Her birthday was just so perfectly the day to do it; on December 26, thrift shops were overloaded with donations - unwanted new clothes and baubles especially - and the 27th was typically as soon as they'd be put up for sale, meaning the best stuff was still around. Better yet, if she was willing to paw through the 'overflow' bins or talk to pickup crews meant to toss the stuff, she could get stuff completely free. With **friends** along as accomplices, she'd never been caught. At least not in any way that invited consequences, given that they were always a gaggle of cute girls.

And this birthday was extra special, because she was spending it with Tsu.

Not that there was anything wrong with her** friends** from middle school, but over the **past year**, she knew her life had drifted so far from anything that resembled theirs. She'd been blasted into unconsciousness on national television, and that was one of the _less_ exciting events since she entered high school! Would they even recognize Uravity as the Ochaco they'd known?

Whatever the reason, she'd made up her mind to spend the day with Tsu, and that was what she was going to do.

Just as she was finally ready to go out, her mom asked, "Would you mind picking up the mail before you leave?"

"Nope!"

One of the packages in the mail stuck out from the others (because it was so big), but she didn't take a proper look at it while bringing it up to her **family**. Only when she'd set everything down on the dining table and her mom said, "This one's for you," did she finally take a look and realize what was off. There was no return address.

She cut the packing tape with the mail key, and inside she found something even more curious: two smaller packages in wrapping paper, as well as a letter. The letter was also addressed to her, and the handwriting was familiar.

_Toga._

"Oh, it looks like a school **friend** sent me some presents! I'll go open them, and then I'll head out.

"Sounds good."

She closed her bedroom door behind her, set the package on her bed, and tore the letter open. The page inside was hand-written on parchment . . . bizarre, to say the least.

_Dear Ochaco,_

_I know you said we shouldn't text anymore, so I thought I'd write you a letter! I wanted to thank you for being such a kind __**friend**__ these past few weeks. I hope things are going well between you and Izuku; I know it would make me very happy if you two were happy together._

_I don't think I'll be able to write again starting pretty soon, so I wanted to make sure I at least got something together for your birthday. I hope you like the stuff I picked out for you, I really tried to get things I knew you'd like._

_I love you, Ochaco, and I'm thinking of you always. Even if we can't be __**friends,**__ I hope you'll keep these around to remember me by (I won't be mad if you don't)._

_Stay safe, and kiss Izuku for me!_

_Love,_

_H.T._

The full implications of the letter didn't hit her by the time she finished reading, so she went for the wrapped **gifts** instead. The wrapping paper was cartoon-space themed, which was awfully cute.

She went for the larger package first, and found inside it . . . another box. A long flat box, obviously clothing of some kind. And inside that box, she found a blouse. Not just _any_ blouse either - a specific one that she'd picked out as one of her favorites when she went 'shopping with Toga' last week. Toga had been so busy complimenting how she looked that she hadn't even considered that she might take that as a suggestion. She'd never even considered that Toga would think to buy her a **gift**.

This was sweet. A little awful, and it riddled her with guilt, but it was sweet nonetheless.

The smaller package also contained a little box, but this one was a more typical **gift** box, like you might find for jewelry.

_Toga didn't buy me jewelry, did she?!_

And, to her immense relief, she didn't find jewelry inside the box. It was a phone charm, an accessory already so outdated that Ochaco barely remembered them from elementary school. You couldn't attach them to smart phones, and almost everyone had a smart phone these days - except for Ochaco.

A few seconds later, she realized something else. The phone charm was hand-made! The cheap beads, the mish-mash of tokens you might find at a merch shop, the -

**_The beads spell out U-R-A-V-I-T-Y!_**

It was cute! It was so goddamn cute! And it was so _her._ How had Toga picked out exactly the sort of tokens she liked, all of her favorite characters?! They were just like the ones she'd seen on her date with Izuku!

_Wait._

They were just like the ones she'd seen on her date with Izuku. The ones she'd pointed out to him in a merch shop while he'd drooled over Pro Hero buttons and pins.

_Wait._

These were the _exact_ ones she'd pointed out to him at the merch shop. But how could Toga have known that! Even if she was following them, even if she was watching them, how could she possibly have known what she said to him about what she liked? How had Toga _heard_ them?

She dumped out her backpack. Her handbag. She pulled the clothes she'd worn on the date out of the hamper and suitcase. She laid out everything, made sure she went over every single item with her fingers, looking for what was wrong.

And it didn't even take her that long. At the bottom of her handbag, she found it. It was the only thing she didn't recognize, a little speaker - or microphone, she guessed. How much could it have picked up from inside her bag? How long had it been there? How much of her life had Toga been privy to without her knowledge?

Ochaco finally realized something. Toga didn't understand her better than other people because she was _special_, or because she was _so __**s**_**_mart._** Toga hadn't been playing by the rules. She'd gotten to know Ochaco whether she liked it or not. She'd found her address! How had she gotten her address? Did that mean the League knew where she lived? Where her **family** lived?

She didn't want to talk to her **family** \- she didn't want to make them panic. She'd dragged them into this situation because she'd been too careless. She hadn't considered what being stalked by a villain really meant.

So she texted Deku.

**Uraraka: **Deku, I need your help.  
**Uraraka: **Toga bugged me. She put some sort of microphone in my bag. She may have bugged you too.  
**Uraraka: **She knows where me and my **family** live.

She was out of the house by the time she got his reply about twenty minutes later.

**Deku: **I have a plan. In the meantime, I don't think she'll try to **hurt** you or your **family**. Try not to be outside alone though, okay?  
I'll let you know once the plan is underway.

There he was. **Smart**, dependable Deku.

**Uraraka: **Thank you.


	7. Bonus! 1: Thrifting

**Summary: **Tsuyu and Ochaco go thrifting for Ochaco's birthday. Unfortunately, one too many Ochacos show up at the store.

* * *

**Tsuyu, December 27 (Ochaco's Birthday), 1:10pm**

The trip from the train to the thrift shop Ochaco wanted to go to was quite a hike, and the dry cold was making Tsuyu sleepy. Even in a duffle coat and heavy clothes, she needed heat packs stuck in her coat pockets and gloves just to keep walking at a regular pace. No one in her family was a fan of the cold, but she could at least tolerate it better than the others.

It did mean they couldn't hold hands, but Ochaco was already making sure of that by texting.

"Oh, come on!" she whined, typing out a response on her phone.

"Deku can't make it?"

Ochaco had been anxiously checking her phone every few minutes ever since she picked Tsuyu up, but all she'd said about it was that she had decided Deku should come along for her birthday as well. As hung up about Deku as she could be, this sort of anxiety wasn't like her, especially since they went out together. Did that mean that this was really about Toga, but she didn't want to bring Toga up around Tsuyu?

_Whatever it is, it's none of my business._

_. . . I do wish she wasn't so disappointed that it's just us._

"No," Ochaco grumbled. "He says he's got plans with _Mei Hatsume_. Since when do those two hang out?!"

Tsuyu tilted her head curiously. "I thought they were friends. Didn't she design his boots?"

"Uugghh," she groaned, stuffing her phone in her pocket. "Yes? Maybe? I don't know, but they _never_ hang out. Why would he start hanging out with her on my _birthday?_"

Mei Hatsume had always been an unusual sticking point for Ochaco, and Tsuyu had literally never been able to put together why. To be fair, she had never seen Izuku and Mei's interactions outside of the sports festival, but nothing about it had looked unusual at the time, beyond Mei herself. The only other interaction Ochaco had ever mentioned was Mei taking measurements for Izuku's gear, which was at worst comfortably friendly.

Ochaco must have read her expression, because she asked, "I know it's stupid to feel like he's picking her over me for no reason. Do you think I'm being unreasonable?"

On one hand, Ochaco was unusually anxious, and Tsuyu really wanted to assure her that she was in the right. On the other hand . . .

"I don't think it's fair to call yourself unreasonable, Ochaco, even if you're upset."

She pressed her gloved finger to her chin, choosing her words carefully. "But it might be a little unfair to expect his time right after you told him you didn't want to date. When did you invite him?"

Ochaco pouted. "Like . . . ten minutes ago."

Tsuyu elected not to say anything more. Ochaco didn't need her to spell everything out - _You don't get a say in people's actions just because you love them._ And, perhaps more specifically, _Izuku has always been single-minded; he doesn't have eyes for anyone but you._

Ochaco didn't have anything more to say, although she did text him one more time before putting her phone away for good. As they started to take side streets to the shop, she started guiding Tsuyu around by the hand without a word.

* * *

Thrifting was weird. The idea of buying random odds and ends at incredibly discounted prices because they had a few scratches - that made sense to Tsuyu. But clothes shopping at thrift stores was one of the most chaotic things Tsuyu had ever witnessed, and she could not figure out how Ochaco was managing to flit from rack to rack and pick things out that she wanted to try on as if it were just that easy.

It looked like clothes were basically all that Ochaco was looking for, which made sense. Even back when they'd met, Ochaco's clothes almost all looked a size too small for her, like she'd just gone through a growth spurt. More recently, she'd taken up wearing only skirts to cover for the fact that she had worn holes in the thighs of all of her jeans, but it was obvious that her whole wardrobe had to be built nearly from scratch.

On her end, Tsuyu was just glad to see proof Ochaco was gaining weight. The girl wouldn't accept meals other people prepared without trading something in return, and she rarely had anything to trade.

"Oh, Tsu!" Ochaco said, pulling something off the rack. "You've GOT to get this."

It was a relatively ordinary black peacoat, with the exception of the-

"IT'S GOT A CUTE FROG!" Ochaco pointed to the tiny embroidered frog's head along the left side, which was the only focal point of color to begin with.

Tsuyu just glanced between the frog and Ochaco's face, amused by her overflowing excitement. She was at her most adorable when she was excited, and Tsuyu had been worried that the Izuku / Mei thing was going to throw their whole trip off, but that luckily appeared not to be the case.

"It's a little big," Tsuyu understated (it was at least three sizes too big, not to mention a men's jacket).

Ochaco pouted real big, somehow cuter, and pointed to the frog again. "You could just try it? . . . for my birthday?"

_I was already going to try it on for fun. It's nice to make you laugh._

_. . . and that is a very cute frog._

"Of course," she said with a little blep. The least she could do was have fun.

* * *

Of course, the coat was monstrously oversized, the sleeves extending all the way to Tsuyu's fingertips. Wearing it managed to make her look huge and tiny at the same time. Satsuki would get a kick out of it, so Tsuyu snapped a picture before stepping out to show Ochaco.

She didn't see her at first, and figured she must have been still loading up clothes to try on. That was, until Ochaco stepped out of the changing room next to her, dressed in new jeans and a tank top.

She looked around, saw Tsuyu, and jumped a little, as if she hadn't expected to see her there. "Oh, Tsu!" Her surprise quickly melted into apparent awe. "You look soooo cute!" She flapped her hands in excitement. "How can you stand being this cute?"

Tsuyu wasn't normally one to blush, but Ochaco's unrestrained enthusiasm caught her off guard. She pressed her finger to her chin and said, "I've got you helping me."

Ochaco blushed right back, glancing around everywhere but her. "Of course. Thanks for spending time with me on my birthday."

Tsuyu just beamed. She was unfortunately tempted to buy the unreasonable coat for nothing else but eliciting this reaction from Ochaco, but that was probably a bad choice.

Ochaco's eyes went wide and her smile turned nervous. "I just realized I forgot something - I'm going to go grab it real quick."

Tsuyu nodded as Ochaco sped off.

_Is she keeping those clothes on while she shops?_ Tsuyu didn't really know the etiquette around here, but that struck her as pretty unusual for any store that sold clothing.

"Oh, Tsu!"

Tsuyu froze when she heard Ochaco's voice behind her, turning slowly to glance behind her shoulder. Ochaco was standing there with a bunch of different pants and skirts draped over her forearm, still wearing her sweater. Her face was absolutely lit up, and as Tsuyu turned to face her, she genuinely gasped.

"You are so adorable! Ahhhh!" She started flapping her hands. "The frog totally s-"

"Toga is here," Tsuyu said.

It was awful to watch the color drain from Ochaco's face in mere seconds, but at least that meant she understood. "W-what?"

"She was trying on clothes in the stall next to me, transformed into you. She must have followed you."

Despite Tsuyu's attempts to stay calm and speak even calmer, Ochaco's fear quickly burned up as her hands clenched into fists.

"I can't _believe_ her," she growled. "Where is she? I'd like a word with her."

"I don't think that's a very good idea," Tsuyu said, even as she started scanning the area for the other Ochaco. "Now that I've seen her, she'll probably try to escape before she's caught. Trapping her could get the people here hurt. Besides, we're civilians right now - we should call this in once we're sure we're safe."

At first, she thought Ochaco was going to argue, but a few seconds later, she visibly relaxed.

"You're right," Ochaco nodded. "Let's make sure she's left first."

They searched around for a few minutes, but they turned up no trace of a second Ochaco. After taking a second to re-assess, they agreed to check the perimeter, starting with the back exit closer to where Tsuyu had last seen her. They found nothing back there but a dumpster and the overflow bins, all stuffed and themselves overflowing. A teenage boy, probably a year or two younger than them, was pawing through the bins - probably looking for a warm coat, given he was only wearing a t-shirt and jeans. No sign of Toga.

"You go around front, and I'll check the back," Tsuyu said. Toga might not immediately panic if she ran into Tsuyu, and it seemed more likely she'd try to disappear through the back than the front.

Walking to the back meant walking by the kid searching for a coat in what was basically trash, which was . . . awkward.

_There's nothing I can do for this kid now that he isn't already doing for himself. Making sure Toga doesn't try and take him hostage or something is the best I can do._

_. . . heroes can't fix everything. We just have to make the world a little less scary._

If she were Froppy at this moment, Tsuyu would probably have at least smiled and said hello, but right now, it was best for her to be as non-disruptive as possible.

"Excuse me," she said, slipping by him. He only responded by stepping a little closer to the bins, out of her way.

She got a whiff of him as she went by, but it wasn't anything like she expected from a kind of grimy-looking teenage boy. He smelled overwhelmingly of cherry blossom. Tsuyu had been in love with Ochaco for almost a year - and this boy smelled just like her.

Tsuyu didn't stop walking until she was out of the alley, at which point she turned the corner of the building and sat flush against the wall, making sure the boy couldn't see her. Texting in the cold was miserable, but at least she didn't still have her gloves on.

**Tsuyu: **Toga is the teenage boy in the alley poking through the bins.

She glanced around the corner and found him faced towards the street, no longer paying attention to the overflow bins.

**Tsuyu: **She might be headed your way. Pretend you don't notice her and let her leave.

The boy was creeping towards the front, looking behind him occasionally. Camouflage couldn't do too much for her in this situation, but he at least didn't seem to notice her spying on him, which was all she needed. Just for a few seconds more, and then he'd escape onto the street . . .

And then Ochaco stepped into the entrance of the alley, blocking it off. He stopped short, and tried to step around her, but Ochaco just stepped to the side to keep blocking him from leaving.

_Why are you being so aggressive, Ochaco?! Let her go!_

He scratched the back of his head, clearly nervous, and Ochaco said something Tsuyu couldn't hear. He stepped back, and she took a step into the alley. He turned around and made a brisk escape to the back exit.

_Where can I_ _hide? _There wasn't a lot back here for her to duck behind, and while she could hypothetically jump to the roof, that would likely constitute trespassing. Which was better - Toga being surprised to find Tsuyu here when she turned the corner, or announcing herself while also clearly trapping her?

Tsuyu stepped into the alleyway with her hands up.

"Toga? We don't want to fight."

The boy stopped short in the middle of the alley, glancing back at Ochaco behind him. It took a little delay before fear covered his face, and he crossed his arms over his stomach, as if protecting himself.

He said, "I don't know what you're talking about. My name is Sojiro."

Tsuyu didn't particularly care if she wanted the maintain the charade so long as she left. "That's f-"

"You're following me," Ochaco cut in, still following him. "I thought I told you to stop looking like me."

He turned to face her again, still backpedaling. Ochaco wasn't having it though - she sped up, and rather than back into Tsuyu, Sojiro backed into a wall, sticking his hand into his pocket. Ochaco caught up to him a second later, slamming her palm into the wall by his head. She was a few inches shorter than him, but he slumped down until she was able to glare right into his eyes. If Tsuyu didn't understand the context, she might have taken this for a weirdly aggressive kabedon.

Tsuyu started walking quickly down the alley. _If Toga has a knife, Ochaco never should have gotten that close!_

"Ochaco, please, back away from him."

"No. Not until we talk," she said, not even looking up.

Tsuyu planned on splitting them up, physically if she had to, but slowed down once she could see the situation a little better.

Sojiro had gone completely red. What she'd taken for panic on his face had vanished in favor of unadulterated rapture, furthering the appearance that Tsuyu had just walked in on a confession. The difference between Ochaco's transparent hostility and Sojiro's passion rendered the whole scene bizarre, and that left her a little unsure how to act.

"You've cornered me," he said, just above a whisper, a grin creeping up on his face. "You're scaring me."

"Uhhh," Ochaco started, clearly blanking. All of her rage was quickly turning into discomfort, and Tsuyu felt the same. Toga had always been such a creep - it wasn't _that_ much of a surprise that she enjoyed being pinned to the wall as much as she'd enjoyed pinning Tsuyu to a tree.

"Ochaco, just let him go."

Finally willing to listen, Ochaco took a step back, although she wouldn't stop staring Sojiro down. Sojiro, on his end, just responded by slumping all the way to the ground, raising his hands to hide his face from view.

Ochaco, even more uncomfortable now, asked, "Uh, Toga, aren't you gonna-"

She cut herself off as the door to the alleyway swung open loudly, and everyone turned to look at whoever would interrupt this strange scene.

And out walked Ochaco, texting on a smart phone.

_Oh my goodness, you can't be-_

"T-Toga?!"

Ochaco's voice startled her out of looking at her phone, and she looked up to see the three of them standing there in the alleyway.

"Well, fuck.*" She said, about-faced, and power-walked for the street.

Tsuyu and Ochaco traded mortified expressions, then turned their attention to the boy now slumped down in the alleyway behind a thrift shop, his breathing unsteady.

"I AM SO SORRY!" Ochaco yelled, bowed as deeply as she could, and ran after Toga.

And for once, Tsuyu found herself flustered to the point of not knowing how to handle a situation. She said, "I'm sorry, we thought you were someone else. We're heroes, and that's a villain, and I'm so sorry, good-bye."

Tsuyu caught up to Ochaco soon after reaching the street, hesitating in front of the street that Toga had simply sprinted through traffic to cross. Just when it looked like Ochaco was going to try and brave the street, Tsuyu grabbed her wrist.

"No. Let her go."

Ochaco was bright pink, stuck somewhere between rage and humiliation, and she kept looking between Tsuyu and the alley Toga disappeared into. After a few seconds, she sputtered something incoherent but clearly frustrated, and Tsuyu nodded.

"We made a mistake. She's gone now, and no one got hurt - except by our actions. We should make sure Sojiro is okay and contact the police."

Once her hand was free again, Ochaco buried her face in her hands, apparently on the edge of crying. It took another minute or so of breathing deep and pretending people weren't staring at them for her to calm down, meanwhile Tsuyu shepherded her away from the sidewalk and back into the alleyway. Sojiro was gone, which, while not ideal, honestly was preferable right now. Cleaning this situation up was going to be unpleasant enough without having to take care of a civilian they got caught up in things for no reason beyond smelling nice.

_I don't think I've ever met a boy who smelled anything like that._

. . . _which still isn't reason for scaring someone like that._

* * *

A few minutes later, when Tsuyu returned from checking the perimeter for Sojiro, she found Ochaco on her phone again.

Ochaco looked up as she approached and, launched into an explanation: "I just got a text from Deku - apparently he got a text from Toga saying she was just looking for clothes and didn't mean to bother us. She said 'sorry.' Ugghh!"

Tsuyu pressed her finger to her chin and tilted her head curiously. "Do you believe that? Seems like a weird coincidence."

Ochaco wasn't dropping her **≧.≦** expression. It would probably take a while for her embarrassment to wear off.

"I don't know," she said, "maybe? I don't know why she'd be shopping with _my_ body though?"

"Hmm," Tsuyu hummed. "If she's telling the truth, it's probably easier to walk around town looking like a new hero than an infamous villain."

"I . . . guess that makes sense. She still has to buy clothes, even if she's a villain."

"Or steal them, in this case," Tsuyu added.

"Oh, who cares," Ochaco groaned. Her tone was so frustrated it took Tsuyu a moment to realize that she was probably wasn't frustrated with _her_, just the situation.

_It was probably petty of me to chide her for stealing clothes when she also kills people._

_. . . and Ochaco might have been in that position before, too. If she got desperate enough._

Tsuyu took Ochaco's hand and tried to give her a reassuring look - which, in her case, was just making steady eye contact. It consistently calmed Ochaco down, and after a few seconds, it seemed to have its intended effect.

She said, "We should buy those clothes you picked out and call it good for now. Let's get some soup."

"Okay," Ochaco said, resting her head against Tsuyu's shoulder for a moment.

_. . . she doesn't smell like cherry blossom anymore. Just lavender._

Tsuyu wrapped her arms around Ochaco's shoulders and held her close until they felt well enough to return to the shop. It was the first time they'd let themselves touch that much since Tsuyu confessed her feelings, and she was glad that things were remaining normal between them.

As glad as she could be at the moment, anyway.


	8. Bleed

**Summary:** Uraraka shows up to have dinner with Midoriya and his mom. Inko won't give up trying to get them to date each other. Uraraka sneaks into his room instead of going home for the night. They get into a fight.

**CW: **Dubious consent

* * *

**Izuku, December 30, 5:35pm**

Midoriya returned home from work-study to find his mother in the kitchen making dinner.

"Oh, Izuku, just in time! We were worried dinner was going to be ready before you got back."

He was halfway to his room before the words processed in his head, and he backed up to the kitchen, puzzled.

"We?"

Inko glanced over at her shoulder. From the smell of things, she must be making tonkatsu. Why she felt the need to reward him after work-study when it was a regular part of his life now was beyond him, but he still appreciated it.

She looked excited, but not the type of excited where she cried, which was a little unusual. "Me and your friend! She just got here a few minutes ago. Ochaco Uraraka? I remember her from the sports festival."

He paused for a few seconds, blankly pondering. Then, he facepalmed.

"Oh! Right. I'm sorry, I totally forgot to tell you that I invited her over and that that was tonight." He scratched the back of his head, embarrassed. "Break's made me lose track of the days."

She smiled. Clearly, his screw-up wasn't a problem in this case. "Well, that's all right - it's nice to have some company."

She turned her attention back to dinner, and he turned to go drop his stuff in his room. Before he could leave, though, she asked, "She said she's not your **girlfriend** . . . is that true?"

_Not even close. I think. _

"No, we're just friends."

He found it weird that Ochaco hadn't chimed in herself and checked the living room, finding it empty. It didn't look like she was on the balcony either.

"Where is she, anyway?" he asked.

"I told her she could hang out in your room if she'd prefer that - not having you here can make introductions a little awkward! Why don't you two go hang out in your room until dinner's ready?"

_She . . . wants me to go hang out in my room with a girl she barely knows? _

". . . you don't want me to set up the table?" He probably sounded more suspicious than he meant to, but that was just because he _was _suspicious.

"Nope! Don't leave your guest alone like that."

_She just wants to figure out if we're really __**dating**__ or not. _Whether she was or she wasn't, he couldn't say he'd mind the chance to go say 'hi' without his mother examining how they interacted, evaluating whether the two of them had lied or not.

_We kissed, but we're _not _**dating**__. I didn't lie. _

He found the door to his room already open, and inside, Ochaco sitting on his bed, her backpack beside it. She wasn't even texting or anything - just waiting from the looks of it. She waved as he stepped into view, and he waved back, half-closing the door as he walked in.

"Hey there, Uraraka," he said, putting his stuff down inside his closet.

"Hey Deku," she said, smiling.

"Sorry I forgot you were coming today; didn't mean to leave you bored."

"No, no, it's okay! I just got here."

"Great."

He sat on the floor opposite of her. He'd like to change, but he also didn't feel like kicking her out immediately.

"How was work?" he asked. "Still bored?"

"Ha, yeah, I guess a little? It's at least nice to have something to do during the break; I'm sure I'm about to get _super _busy, though."

He cocked an eyebrow. "Oh?"

"Y'know. School and stuff." She shrugged.

The empty small talk continued on for a few minutes until Inko called out, "Izuku? Ochaco? Dinner's ready."

"Coming!"

He picked himself up off the floor, thought about changing, and decided it could wait until after dinner. As he reached for the door, he felt a tap on his shoulder, paused, and turned around. Ochaco held a finger over her lips, a silent 'sshh' until he nodded; then she stepped forward up on her toes and kissed him, just for a second. Her cherry blossom smell brought him right back to that long moment where they'd practiced in his bedroom, and he was shocked to realize how natural the motion could feel.

"What was that for?" he whispered as she stepped back, **blushing**, as if surprised at what she'd done.

She shook her head. "Nothing," she replied just as quiet, "I'm just happy to see you."

He only gave a little smile in response, then opened the door.

* * *

"So, Ochaco, do you have a **boyfriend**?"

If Inko was trying to bait a concerned, meaningful glance between Izuku and Ochaco, she definitely pulled it off.

Luckily, Ochaco was still quick enough to respond, "Oh, n-no, not right now. UA keeps us super busy; I don't think many students have much time for **romance**."

"Well, that's too bad."

There was a short pause before she started up again; "I saw you during the sports festival on TV. I felt so bad that you had to go up against Kacchan in your first round - but you were so cool! And tactical! I was a little upset the first time I watched it, but on a re-watch I realized how impressive your fight really was."

Midoriya winced, preferring to think about almost _any _other point in Ochaco's hero career, but Ochaco smiled.

"Thanks! I know I'm going to have to keep getting stronger and stronger until I can beat Kacchan next year."

_Speaking of which _, "Yeah!, Uraraka has gotten so strong since then. Literally. She got into martial arts and now she's doing weight training seriously, so she's double-cool now."

Ochaco **blushed**, but didn't say anything.

"I don't know if you know this, Ochaco," Inko said, "but when Izuku was younger, we saw a quirk specialist who said **he didn't have a quirk!** I never even saw him use it until the sports festival - it was so scary, watching him fight that Todoroki boy, not knowing why his quirk was hurting him so much."

Ochaco stared at him and just blinked a few times, some silent question running through her head. Then, as if she could sense her lagging response pulling down the conversation, she said, "I know what you mean, about how he used to fight being really scary. The first time we met he got really beat-up . . . but he's gotten really good at using his quirk (although he hasn't told any of us its name yet)! He's a real cool hero."

Inko smiled. "I'm glad to hear it."

Beat.

"Come to think of it, I don't know what he calls his quirk, either. It's nothing like what me or his father have - have you named yours? You're a practicing hero now."

_Why did you have to take an interest in that now?! _

He laughed nervously and said, "Well, I haven't really named the quirk itself, but I _have _named the technique I use to control it. I call it 'Full Cowling*.'"

At their curious looks, he explained, "'Cowling' refers to the cover over a vehicle engine. My technique is about limiting how much of the 'engine' I use so it doesn't over-exert my body like it used to. And I call it 'Full Cowling' because I learned to channel it through my whole body instead of just my hand or leg, like I did back at the Sport's Festival."

He felt stupid giving the break-down like that, but both Inko and Ochaco looked excited.

"Wow," Ochaco said. "So that time you saved me during the entrance exams - that's just _how strong _your quirk was without training?! If you ever manage to use it without hurting yourself, you're going to be as strong as All Might! . . . no, stronger!"

Inko looked downright shocked at this, but he just gave a bashful smile. "I guess so, yeah. I'm working on it."

* * *

**Izuku, December 30, 9:00pm**

"I'll see you later, Deku!"

"Yeah, see you at school Uraraka."

They waved and he closed the door behind her.

Inko wasted no time in ambushing him with, "Izuku, Ochaco seems like **a very nice girl**."

She was sitting on the couch in front of the television, but that also meant it would be very obvious if he tried to (literally) skirt around this conversation and go to his room.

"Yeah, she is."

She smiled. "And like a pretty cool hero! Uravity!"

"Yeah."

"It's too bad that no boy has asked her out, but **that probably won't last forever.**"

_I don't like where this is going. _

". . . yeah?"

He was just standing awkwardly at the edge of the living room, hoping his discomfort would be enough for her to drop the conversation. After a short pause, he was sure he'd found his respite, and turned to go to his room.

No such luck. "Izuku," she said.

"Yeah mom?"

"Why don't _you _ask Ochaco out? You two seem to get along well, and she's very cute."

He sighed. _Welp, there it is. _

"I . . . she's not looking for a relationship right now."

For as much as she was able to overlook so he could have a private life, this was apparently not included. Her eyes narrowed in suspicion, although it was obvious she was also delighted.

"So you _want _to ask her out, then?"

Another sigh. "Yes, mom."

"So ask her out!"

_I __**literally can't**__. _

"But she's got other stuff going on," he protested, not wanting to admit how much **dating** had been on both of their minds. That could only make this conversation a lot harder and a _lot _weirder.

Inko wasn't deterred - her voice only turned more insistent; "Why not ask her out and then help her with those things? **I doubt there's going to be less going on later.**"

She hit the proverbial nail of his worries on the head, and when he protested, his voice shot up with transparent worry. "That's not how that works, Mom!"

"I don't see why not!" She didn't typically get huffy, but apparently this was something worth getting huffy about.

She was getting far too close to an argument he couldn't ignore, but the idea of making this situation his problem on top of everything else terrified him.

He said, "Please just . . . we're friends for now," his voice turning soft again. He didn't want to fight about this.

Finally taking his cue, she turned her attention back to the TV with a, "Fine."

As he turned to go once again, she tacked on, "But I think you should ask her out **before one of your handsome classmates** sweeps her off her feet!"

"Good night, Mom!"

* * *

Just a few minutes later, while Midoriya was sitting at his desk, he heard a knock. Not from his door, but from his window. Unsurprised, he glanced over and found Ochaco perched precariously on the outside of his windowsill. It was the third story, but he couldn't exactly be surprised that she'd managed to get up here without too much effort.

He slid his window open and helped her climb in, doing his best not to make any noise."

"Oooh thank you. I didn't want to stop hanging out just yet, but I thought your mom would insist."

The living room was on the opposite side of the house, but the walls in this apartment were almost paper-thin. If he was going to avoid getting in trouble, they'd have to be dead quiet. Which, to be fair, he'd learned to do, living in dorms with Lights Out at 10pm.

"That's because it's getting late. You should probably be getting home," he said, sitting on the edge of his bed.

She slid his window shut and sat in his desk chair. "But _you _opened the window."

"Fair enough, I guess."

He laced his fingers together in his lap. "So, you found my place . . . to have dinner?"

"Pretty much," she replied, smug-faced. "And to see you get flustered. You're so _cute _when you're embarrassed, you know? Although you handled it all a little better than I thought you would. Were you expecting me?"

"In a sense," he shrugged. "You always show up when I least expect it."

She just grinned in response.

" . . . do you mind changing, though? I have some clothes you can borrow if you need them."

The grin didn't fade at all. "Why? Do I smell bad after a hard day's work?"

He rolled his eyes. "I just prefer it when you look more like yourself."

"Well, if you insist," she said, pulling herself up out of the chair.

She peeled off her sweater such that he got a tantalizing, if brief, look at her abdomen. Once it was clear that she wasn't stopping there (and she started unzipping her pants), he closed his eyes, put his hands over them for extra protection, and laid back on the bed so he wasn't even aimed in her general direction.

"Just let me know when you're done."

"Sure thing," she whispered softly, definitely closer than before.

Despite his attempts to not pay attention to her stripping, he could definitely _hear _it fine, which proved to be a lot more stimulating than he'd predicted. He had never realized just listening to someone tug their pants off could make you think about their legs so much. Did he even _like _legs in particular? Apparently! And even that didn't compare to the raw horror of hearing her bra unclasp.

_Think about something else. Think about pro heroes! Like, uh, Mt. Lady! ... maybe a different hero, actually, like Endeavor. Endeavor is the new top hero. Since All Might's retirement, he's - WHY IS SHE SLIDING THEM OFF SO SENSUALLY? _

At this point he was sure she was messing with him, because he couldn't think of another reason it would take someone like 10 seconds to remove their underwear. He thought she was just going to have to put clothes _on _, not take so much off?!

Somehow, she managed to take another minute making very little noise but her own (slightly unsteady) breathing that was too close to the edge of his bed to escape his attention.

Then, finally, she said, "All right, you can open your eyes."

He let his hands drop and opened his eyes, Toga's self-satisfied grin looming over him, fully dressed in her uniform.

"Boo," she said.

He glared. "Very funny."

She backed up a little so he could sit up, but instead of returning to the chair, she just crouched on the floor next to the pile of Uraraka's clothes.

"So you _can _transform while wearing clothes."

She giggled, holding her sleeve over her mouth. "Technically. But I need extra blood to do it, or else I risk having a layer of clothes between me and the body I'm wearing . . . which sucks."

"Huh."

He stared at the clothes on the ground until he became self-conscious. "Did you really go and buy new clothes for her?"

She rested her chin in her palm. "Um, yeah? They're really cute on her, and she's a little small for my clothes. Or she was - she's been looking absolutely _delicious _recently. You should have seen her on her birthday; I'd never seen her so aggressive before. Who knows what she would have done to me if my **double** hadn't shown up . . ."

Her face was flushed from the thought of it, and he had to keep himself from laughing. For all her weirdness in going about it, Toga really did have a crush on Uraraka, and there was something profoundly adorable about it once you got past the fear of her sharp teeth and predatory eyes.

"Still," he said, "She might not appreciate you getting naked in front of other people as her. That's got to be sexual harassment of . . . some kind."

"What am I supposed to do, wear more layers? I hate layers!" Her smile dropped to a smirk. "Besiiides, I'm not so sure she'd mind getting naked in front of you. She's more into you than you think she is; you're like, kind of hot. I'd know. I've been you."

This time, at least, he knew for sure that she was hitting on him - _had been _hitting on him - but that somehow only managed to make him feel so **blushy** that he was getting a little light-headed. Was this flirting? Was that seriously what they were doing? How had it gotten to the point that she'd not only found his house, impersonated his friend, and snuck into his room, but then proceeded to hit on him and his crush back-to-back . . . and he was having fun with it?

Somewhere in the past few weeks, he'd just come to realize that she really was spending time with him of her own accord, apart from being a villain, and started thinking of her as a friend.

_. . . talk about a weird friendship. _

It took a lot of sorting out, but eventually he was able to stutter out a, "It - it's - it's not the same if you do it as her or she does it. And, besides, Uraraka and I are _not _**dating**."

She laughed a sweet little laugh, stifling it again with her sleeve as she stood. "I'm not sure how long that'll be the case if your mom has any say in it. She thinks Ochaco is just _adorable _. Before you know it, she's going to be asking for grand-kids."

That was a mortifying thought. More mortifying still that he couldn't say she was definitely wrong about that.

Before he could think up any sort of witty response, though, Toga stepped forward, lifting her knee up onto the bed next to him, as if she were going to straddle him.

She said, "She probably thinks you'll stop taking so many risks if you have a **girlfriend**."

He barely heard that, though, because the inside of her bare thigh was touching his leg and all of his other senses vanished in favor of making him incredibly aware of the heat of her skin. He hadn't considered the implication he might have been giving off inviting her into his bedroom like this - he thought she just wanted to talk some more! What did she think they were going to do?!

"You know we're - _we're _not **dating**, right?"

Her eyes were hungry in a way he did not understand, but rather than taking this as a soft rejection, her smirk only grew more twisted.

"We don't have to be **_dating _**, Izuku baby," she replied, cupping his cheek and sitting entirely in his lap. Her eyes were so close to his, and her mouth was so close he could feel her breath, somehow rougher than his despite her lack of hesitation.

A cocktail of feelings and sensations was flooding through him, most of them fear. **So many fears** \- of being found, of being so close to someone, of having no experience with an overt come-on, of the violence barely under the light of her eyes, of hurting Uraraka, of hurting Toga, of failing as a Hero, and, perhaps most saliently, of **not knowing if he wanted to say 'no' or not** \- but no idea of how to be brave in the face of them.

Toga's hand trailed from his cheek, her nails too gentle to scratch over his neck, down to his heart. It was racing out of control, and Toga could feel it; her eyes fluttered closed as if her touch were a kiss.

_If this is all she wants . . . I think I'm okay with that. I can handle that. _

Her smile slowly faded as she focused on his heart, and he took slow, steady breaths, concentrating on bringing his heart rate down. Her body slowly slumped forward until her whole weight was on him (he realized, for the first time, just how small she was), resting her head against the crook of his neck. He knew, if she wanted, that there was nothing he could do at this point to keep her from ripping his throat out. But he didn't push her away. He let her rest there, feeling his slowing heart beat.

Inko's voice came from just outside his door: "Izuku? I'm going to bed; try not to stay up too late."

"I won't! Good night M-mom!"

He stuttered as Toga pressed a kiss to his neck, and a shiver ran through his body. It didn't stop with that either, as her kiss slowly turned into sucking instead. He just endured it until he heard his mom's door close, then whisper-yelled, "Toga?! What are you doing?!"

Toga giggled, mischievous and saccharine, and whispered back, "I'm showing you the ropes. You don't want to be clueless when it's Ochaco sneaking into your room, do you?"

_I know I'm clueless. And no, I don't want to be . . . But I always thought I was going to figure all of that out with somebody I loved!_

_And I don't love you. _

Explaining was hard, and it was **scary**, and it might drive her away. Whatever he was going to do, he didn't want that. He needed her to be comfortable around him. It was the only way he would be able to do what he needed to do.

He swallowed, and offered her one more out: ". . . my mom will hear us if we **. . .**" unable to even say the words to complete his thought.

"Then try not to make too much noise."

She pushed him down flat against the bed, pulling herself further up on his body before leaning down to kiss him. Even with her hair up, he could smell the cherry blossom scent everywhere on her, just as overwhelming, just as sweet. He liked it, but it also bothered him.

"Why - why-"

It took him a few tries to start talking before she picked up on it and stopped kissing, instead staring straight into his eyes. It was even more unsettling so close to his face. But, as **scary** as they were, he appreciated how much they set her apart - from Uraraka especially.

"Why do you try so hard to **copy** her?" he asked. "You're fine like this."

Even he didn't know what 'this' could possibly refer to that could be described as 'fine.'

She shook her head and replied, "She's **almost perfect**, Izuku. You can see it too, right? That beautiful feeling she has . . ."

The thought of Uraraka was apparently enough to draw her in again, because she trailed off to kiss him some more. Kissing her was nothing like kissing Uraraka had been - not only because she knew what she was doing, but because there was no hesitation in it. Toga knew what she wanted and she took it. Not like him. Not like Uraraka, either.

It took some time for what she said to sink in, especially given how busy he was trying to figure out how to kiss her back, and double especially because he was so nervous about what to do with his hands.

_She thinks Uraraka is . . . __**perfect**__? Or, almost perfect? _That was the strangest conclusion to him; he didn't like Uraraka because she was close to perfect, nor did he even have a clue what 'perfect' could possibly mean. He liked Uraraka because she struggled and fought for what she wanted, because she loved her family so much, because of all the little quirks that made her unforgettable. Some of it he didn't even like, per se, like her intense competitiveness, or her nervous jealousy around Hatsume. At the end of the day, he just liked being with her.

The kissing was getting rougher and more constant, so he was glad for the opportunity to think (and breathe) when she sat up. Both of those went right out the window when she sat back in his lap, grinding against him. If she had at least been wearing pants instead of a skirt, maybe there would have been enough layers between them that he wouldn't notice how soft and warm she was, maybe there would be some room for denial that he could feel every motion she made on top of him.

"I don't . . . know what's happening?" Maybe if she would just explain, he would know what to do.

She snickered. "Can't you figure it out?"

_No! , I clearly can't! _

She at least stopped grinding on him, taking a moment to just look at him. What she was thinking, he couldn't begin to guess, but her **blush** still hadn't faded. If anything, she was even more **overstimulated** from this whole situation than he was.

_What does she want from me?, right now, and in general? I don't even know what _I _want. Why can't she just talk to me about it? Where does this stop? _

_What about Uraraka? _

She didn't seem to have a clue what _he _was thinking, either; after a moment of looking down at him, she leaned back down to kiss his cheek. Which was cute, but of course it didn't stop there. Her next kiss was just below his ear (which was a lot more sensitive than he expected!), and there she paused.

"You smell like . . . orange citrus now? Not like her."

"I-is that bad?"

"Oh, no, just . . . new."

Her kisses made a slow, deliberate trail down his neck, and all the work he'd put into getting his heart rate down was for not. Was this normal? Was it normal to feel short of breath and a little bit **terrified** when making out? Or was that just because he was so aware of her fangs? And so aware of her lips: warm, needy, never gentle.

And then, there was a sharp pain through his shoulder muscle, and it took all of his self-control just to avoid crying out.

"What the - hell?"

The pain was freeing, and he finally knew how to move - he sat up and shoved her back at the same time, the pain in his shoulder sharpening, tearing, until she was off of him. She dropped right to the floor, alarmed but apparently unharmed, except for the **blood** on her mouth.

_Blood?! _

"I . . ." she started, but he wasn't paying attention.

He checked his shoulder with his hand, then found his hand **stained with blood**. She'd bit him. She'd definitely bit him. How much of him could she want? How much would she _take _?

"Dammit; why did you _do _that, Toga?!" he snapped.

His anger fell short as soon as he saw her eyes get glassy. But before he could be sure that's what he saw, she bolted, hopping onto his windowsill and climbing down with agility that might at any other time be very impressive.

He followed her to the window. Once she hit the street, she just started running.

_What is she _doing?

_I can't just leave her like this. _

He wanted to follow her - but there was one thing he needed to be sure of, first.

Inko knocked on his door halfway through him stuffing the pile of clothes she'd left behind in his closet (careful not to get any blood on it).

"Izuku? Are you okay? I heard a noise."

_No! _

"Oh, yeah, I just tripped on some laundry. I'm cleaning up so it doesn't happen again."

"Oh, okay. Good night."

"Night."

* * *

By the time he was finished with her stuff, he had no guarantee that he'd be able to follow her, but that didn't stop him from using Full Cowling to jump from a third-story window without breaking his legs. He'd need the speed to catch her, so he kept Full Cowling at 5%, aiming for the train station. She would try to avoid the most-trafficked and brightest-lit roads, so she would be staying on residential streets. With that in mind, he followed what he thought was her most likely route towards the train.

He'd turned a few streets before he encountered another person, but the sight of someone else was enough to get him to drop Full Cowling (he didn't feel like getting a cop, or worse, a pro hero sicced on him for unauthorized quirk use). They were standing in a shadowy spot between two lights, so they were tough to make out, but they definitely weren't Toga - their silhouette was all wrong.

At the sound of his fast approach, the person turned to look at him. At first, he was just confused, but a second later he realized why the person's face didn't look right.

It was **another him**. Another Midoriya.

He came to a stop a little before reaching them, breathing heavily. "Toga?"

They flinched. Then, without warning, they rushed at him, jabbing at his face. It was easy enough to dodge, but still startling.

"Toga, what the hell? Stop it."

The other Izuku's face was cold and furious - nothing like her usual face.

They said, "Sorry, Toga's not here," and raised their hands in a guarded stance. "Just me."

"I don't want to fight you-" he said, though they threw a roundhouse at his head before he could finish.

He caught their ankle instead of dodging this time. He really didn't like it when people attacked him while he was trying to talk a problem out.

He glared back at her; "I said I didn't want to, not that I wouldn't."

_I just won't use Full Cowling unless I have to escape. She left her knife in her bag, so I don't think I'll end up too much worse for fighting. My shoulder stings pretty bad, but there isn't much bleeding. I can fight without much of a problem. _

He tried flipping them onto their back, but they just rolled with the motion into a handstand, back onto their feet. The two of them took the same stance and paused, each waiting for the other to strike.

"What happened, Toga? Why did you . . ."

He paused, seeing no recognition in their face. Then he tried again. "What happened to Toga?"

"I told her to leave, and now she's gone." They had another exchange of blows, but neither of them gained the upper hand.

"I never said that! I just want to talk to her about what happened."

The other Midoriya laughed, although they didn't give up attacking. "What happened? She acted like a goddamn **beast - because she ****_is _****a beast**. Don't you get it? She's **bad. She'll always ****_be _****bad**."

"I don't believe that."

_Is this what she thinks I think of her? Or is this just what she thinks about herself? _

It didn't take him long to recognize what was so strange about the way Toga was fighting - from what he knew of her fighting style, she mostly relied on knives and grapples while constantly attacking. But right now, she was fighting much like he did, relying on quick punches and kicks before allowing space between them again. He wasn't sure when, but clearly she'd watched him fight before since developing Shoot Style.

The other Midoriya didn't respond until he tried to grapple them, and they stared him right in the eyes.

"She's **disgusting**," they spat. "We shouldn't waste our time on **someone like that**."

"Don't tell me it's a waste! She's **my friend**!"

He was getting worn down much faster than they were, and he knew it. Every time they got into a melee, he would take one or two good hits, and by the time he could retaliate, they'd made distance between them again. In hand-to-hand combat, she knew how to use his body even more effectively than he did. Frustrating - but she was used to fighting quirkless. He'd need to switch his approach.

"You shouldn't be her **friend**, Deku. She's **a villain**, and she'll only drag you down with her."

"_Fuck off!" _

It was bullshit enough that they were saying this stuff, but they fact that they were saying it _as him _was intolerable.

His anger spilled over into attacking, and the flow of the fight shifted as they were forced to block and dodge without a chance to counter. Once he saw an opening, he figured this fight had gone on long enough - _I can end it with one punch. _

One for All jolted through his body in an instant, and he swung right at their face, their eyes wide with the realization they'd lost.

And, faster than he thought possible, they side-stepped, caught his wrist, grabbed his neck, and pulled him down to the ground with his own momentum leading. As soon as he was face-down, they sat on his back, pinning his arm painfully in place.

They both sat there, panting for a second, before he asked, "Was that . . . Full Cowling? How did you move so fast?"

Their grip only tightened painfully on his wrist. "You don't need some enhancer quirk to be fast, dumb ass," they sneered. "Haven't you learned anything yet?"

_Oh, shut up! _

He charged his finger with as much of One for All as he could without breaking it, then flicked it. The resulting shockwave knocked them right off, giving him plenty of time to drag himself forward and back to his feet. They didn't look injured, staggering to their feet at about the same time. At the very least, they didn't move in to attack again yet.

He said, "I don't believe any of the stuff that you're saying about Toga. I know she's done a lot of things wrong - evil things - but **I can't give up** on her."

They rushed forward, going for another high kick, just as easy to block as the first time. Only, they immediately followed it up by dropping their foot, pivoting, and kicking him square in the abdomen, knocking the wind out of him.

He staggered back, trying to breathe, as the other Midoriya stood over him.

They said, "**She's never going to be good**. No matter how hard you try, **there is nothing good left** in her."

It took a few seconds of wheezing before he could respond: "It's - not about - if she's **good**. - If I'm gonna be - the Symbol of Peace - that peace has got to - be for everyone. **That means her, too.**"

The look of pure offense on their face was the first time they looked anything like Toga.

". . . The Symbol of Peace? Like . . . All Might?"

He nodded.

Their hostility started wavering, their hands falling down to their sides. "You're **idealistic**, Deku . . ."

Their voice was softer now, so Midoriya figured it was safe to let his guard drop - appreciated, given that he was still recovering from getting kicked like that.

"And **stupid**!" The punch came before he could react, smashing him in the jaw and knocking him to the ground.

The fight was over as far as he could tell, which was a blessing given how dazed he was. All he could hear was the sound of their panting a little out of his sight, and a dull ringing in his ears from hitting his head against asphalt.

A minute later, he heard Ochaco's voice a second before she stepped into view; "Deku? You're hurt. Let me help you."

She crouched down beside him, inspecting the wound on his shoulder. "Any fractures that you can feel?"

"No, I'm - I'm okay."

He said that, but the idea of sitting upright was unbearable. Lying on asphalt while not getting beat up wasn't so bad.

He said, "I thought you . . . liked me better this way."

She shook her head. "I'm nothing like that **freak**. I'm a Hero . . ." she reached out, brushing the back of her fingers ever so gently over his cheek. "I help people."

It finally clicked. '_Don't bite. Don't smile like that. Don't talk about your feelings or your weird crushes. Just be a __**nice girl.**__' 'You can imagine how people responded once they found out.'_

_**Everything people told her not to do . . . she did with me.**__ Because we're friends. And I didn't get mad or tell her not to. Not until the bite. _

_She _was _afraid, just like me. Of being treated like __**a freak**__. And maybe that's what it looked like when I got mad - not because I thought it, but because that's how everyone else responded. _

It took some effort, but he reached up and grabbed her wrist as tightly as he could without using One for All. Through gritted teeth, he said, "Don't call her a freak. Or a beast, or disgusting. **I don't like people . . . who bully others. Especially about their quirk**."

She froze for a long moment. If the pain bothered her, she didn't show it.

"You need to go to a hospital. You're bleeding."

He didn't let go of her wrist. "Please don't . . . I don't want them to know she was here. I want you to be safe, **Himiko**."

She sighed, but didn't say anything at first.

Then, "Then I'll have to patch you up myself."

She started to pry his fingers off, but it took him a few seconds to realize that she had agreed. He let her go as soon as he figured it out, lying back limp on the street once again.

It was deeply unsettling to watch her clothing and flesh melt, but at least this time he understood what he was seeing. Once she was reconstituted as Toga, she reached into her sweater and pulled out her phone.

"Give me a second. I need to call a friend."


	9. Wounds

**Summary: **Toga patches Izuku up while they have a conversation about their relationship, such as it is. She invites him out for chicken nuggets, and they ask each other questions as part of a **game**. Izuku's plan hits Phase 3.

* * *

**CW** sexual assault (referenced), torture (referenced)

* * *

**Izuku, December 30, 10:45pm**

Midoriya didn't know _where _they were going exactly, but once Toga staunched the bleeding, she helped him walk to the train. Some people on the walk and on the train appeared to notice the **blood** soaking into his shirt, but nobody stopped them or said anything.

Once they reached their (unfamiliar) stop, Toga led him to a long row of dumpy-looking apartment buildings, into one of them, and up to the third floor. She hadn't explained where they were going (or said much at all - she was on her phone the whole train ride), but soon enough she knocked on one of the doors, and a man appeared in the doorway.

He wasn't a villain - or at least, no one Midoriya recognized - with the deepest stress-crease down his forehead he'd ever seen and eyes so flat and dead he might as well be a corpse. He smelled of cigarettes from several feet away, and those dead-looking eyes of his slid right past Toga back to Midoriya.

There was a moment of quiet where none of them said anything.

Then the man said, ". . . you brought Izuku Midoriya."

"He's hurt."

Somehow the man's face managed to fall further. No one compared to the personification of weariness that was this man.

". . . right." He sighed. "Well, first aid kit's in the bathroom, I'll leave you to it. What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Midoriya flinched, but Toga appeared to not even notice his confrontational tone. She just stepped inside, pat him on the shoulder, and said, "Thanks, Jin."

When she noticed him hesitating in front of the doorway, Toga beckoned him inside with a finger. "Come on, he won't **bite**."

The man snorted, but left the doorway entirely to go sit on a couch inside instead.

Midoriya followed her into a dirty bathroom, almost every surface cluttered with half-used duplicate products and trash. The mirror in particular looked like it had never been cleaned, with hundreds of little stains and streaks obscuring much of its bottom half. She pulled a first-aid kit out from underneath the sink, just sweeping the clutter into a pile to make room for it.

"Sit." The toilet cover was the only bare surface, so it would have to do.

She pulled the fabric aside. "Hm. Shit, that's . . . pretty bad. Take off your shirt."

He grabbed the bottom of his shirt, then hesitated. He completely understood the medical necessity of taking his shirt off to clean the wound, but doing it in front of Toga felt-

"Just do it, you big **baby**," she commanded, interrupting his thoughts. She rolled up her sleeves (as well as could be expected, given how over-sized it was) and started washing her hands. "I've literally transformed into you before, there's no reason to be modest."

_Oh my god. She . . .! _

He did his best not to think about how much of his body she could have, must have seen, and peeled his shirt off. Lifting his arms over his head sucked, and 'peeling' was a little too literal with how it stuck to his skin, but as soon as it was off, he had a much better gauge of the injury's severity. It didn't look very deep, but it definitely bled a lot, and shoving her off while her teeth were still inside him had clearly been a stupid idea - most of the bleeding came from jagged tears on his shoulder. Her had used to think of her fangs like a snake's, but really, they were more like a cat or dog's, capable of tearing through muscle and flesh with ease.

"I guess you'd have experience treating **bites**, huh?"

She laughed as she dried her hands, but after a few seconds of empty staring, she realized he was serious.

"Oh. Oh, no, not really. I don't typically stick around to see what happens."

His alarm must have shown, because her eyes went wide and her voice went up in concern: "Don't worry though! I read about what to do online on the train. You're lucky I can do stitches."

She spent a while searching for the cleanest-looking rag, prepping it with hot water and soap, and cleaning away the **blood** around the wound. He sat quietly, a lot weighing on his mind, like _I'm really hanging out in a friend of Toga's bathroom while she patches me up _, and _Does she usually leave people to die? _One thought had been worrying him much longer, ever since their fight, but he couldn't put it into words just yet.

She said, "So, we can't really run the wound under warm water with soap given where it is, so you'll need to take a warm shower and use antibacterial soap to clean it. Want me to help you with that?"

_How is she hitting on me again when the mood is like this? _Not only had they gotten into a fist fight, but probably nowhere had ever made him feel less flirtatious than this bathroom.

So, instead of acknowledging she'd said that, he asked, "Toga . . . if I ask you a personal question, would you answer it?"

She expression went flat. "Maybe. What is it?"

He kept his hands together, trying to keep his anxious fidgeting down.

"Do you really believe **all those things** you said as me?"

Her eyes slid away from his, somewhere in all the mess, or perhaps the first aid kit. After a pause, she shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe."

"You know _I _don't believe it, right? I don't think you're a **freak.**"

The tiny, darting movements of her eyes betrayed a lot of thought, even as the rest of her body was awfully still.

He didn't get an answer, just, "You've really got to get this wound clean. Warm water for 5 minutes, then I'll stitch you up."

And then she left him alone.

_I never thought you were a __**freak.**_

* * *

**Toga, December 30, 11:00pm**

Toga all but collapsed onto the couch, not wanting to think about anything - and absolutely not wanting to think about what he'd asked her about. Jin returned to the living room with a beer and sat in a chair across from her, neither of them saying anything for a minute.

"You know how Tomura will react if he figures out what you're doing, right? Are you stupid or something?"

He wasn't angry, which at least made him easy to dismiss.

"This is my own thing; it has nothing to do with him or the League."

Jin rolled his eyes, gesturing at his bathroom. "You brought him _here. _It's **safe** to say this isn't 'your own thing' anymore."

He was right, of course, and she had been on pretty thin ice before this point anyway. Casually stalking Izuku and Ochaco had been one thing, more of a hobby than any kind of relationship. But ever since she'd snuck into UA, and especially since she'd gotten caught, she had become a liability for the League. She told herself that with their next big project coming up, she would drop communications with them and return to being a dedicated villain for a while, but she kept mentally pushing back the day to start that so she could stay close to them. Ochaco had forced her hand, but instead of freeing her time, she'd just spent her time on more indirect projects, like making Ochaco's phone charm.

She told herself that if she just kept moving forward, she could turn this liability into an asset. But even she knew that was bullshit at this point.

". . . I don't have a lot of friends to call, Jin. And you could have said 'no.'"

He sighed. "I don't have a lot of friends either. I'd prefer not to have one less."

"Well, don't tell anyone, and no one will know." She didn't mean to snap, but her self-moderation was wearing thin after a whole evening with Izuku and his mom (not to mention everything else).

"I hope you're right. I doubt that."

There was a short pause.

Then, Jin asked, "Why are you patching him up, anyway?"

_Great question. _

"I don't . . . totally know. But he didn't want to go to a hospital. He thought it would tip people off about me."

He leaned forward in his seat, clearly surprised for the first time tonight. "And that's something he cares about?"

She shrugged. _Another great question. I have no idea what's going on, either. _She'd prefer nothing more than to lay out every interpretation of his behavior that she could and dissect the logic that made him tick, but for the second time since they'd met, she was genuinely unable to understand his motivations. Izuku's mind was transparent most of the time, but sometimes he was totally opaque to her. Beyond all of her adoration, that made him fascinating. And frightening.

"I guess? I'm really confused right now, but it said on the internet that **human** **bites** can be really dangerous, so I'm going to make sure he's okay."

Jin tapped his empty beer bottle, clearly thinking about something. When she looked at him expectantly, he finally spoke up.

". . . I know you said you were going on dates, but I thought that was just a joke, or a euphemism . . . are you and this kid - Midoriya - really dating?"

_What? _

"No, we're just . . . just . . ." she trailed off, blushing from embarrassment and a very confusing sort of **pleasure**. "I don't think so?"

Jin's eyes narrowed with suspicion. More tapping on the bottle. "How'd he get that **bite?**"

"Um . . ." _I can see where this is going and I don't like it _, "-we were just **kissing**. And **stuff**."

She knew she was blushing terribly at this point, but hiding that from Jin was pointless, so she just stared at the ground instead of trying to hide her face entirely.

He left his beer bottle on the coffee table and rubbed his face with his hands, clearly stressed. The crease on his forehead grew creasier.

"You know how that sounds, right?" She felt his eyes boring into her, but refused to look at them. "I thought you bit him while fighting - why's he so beat up? Does he _like _getting roughed up? It sure would explain a lot."

_Oh my god what if he does?! _

_Not the time for that! _

She swallowed, apprehensive, and said, "No, we got in a fight because I - I think I misunderstood. Something." She frowned. "I'm not totally sure what, though."

Jin didn't say anything immediately, just kept staring at her as if she'd figure it out under pressure.

Luckily, she didn't have to deal with that for long - after a moment, she heard the shower turn off in the bathroom. She stood up immediately.

"I've gotta go help him." Finally looking Jin in the (disbelieving, deeply-concerned) face, she told him, "Just don't tell anyone we're . . ."

"Necking?" he offered, far too sardonic for something that was _technically _accurate.

"Anything. Just don't say anything. I'll figure it out."

He smiled wearily. "This all isn't like you."

Despite his words, the smile reached his eyes. "You must really **love** him to be this stupid."

_'I'm seventeen!' _she wanted to shout. But that wasn't fair. Her whole relationship with Jin, and with the League, was predicated on the idea that no one could see her as a child. She couldn't resort to a shitty explanation like that just because she didn't have a genuine retort.

She was acting dumber. Denying it would only be dumber.

She said nothing and entered the bathroom.

She hadn't given him much time, but Izuku was out of the shower and wrapped in a towel by the time she walked in. He must have assumed that she wouldn't hesitate to walk in on him naked to fluster him (even if the real reason was getting away from Jin) and prepared accordingly.

_Smart boy. _

She laid out everything she needed for stitches while he sat back on the toilet cover, neither of them speaking at first. Even when she did start speaking, it was only medical instructions, and he only gave her nods and 'Mm's to make it clear he'd heard. Whatever had been weighing on him before only seemed to weigh twice as much after his shower.

As she started the stitches, Izuku didn't flinch at all, the only sign he even felt discomfort his clenched fist. His pain tolerance was high (it had to be, with the quirk he had). Perhaps it was too high. As much as she liked seeing him **bloodied** up, she didn't want him to suffer. He didn't **deserve** that.

This was all her fault, she was sure of it. She just wished she knew why.

"I'm sorry," she finally said, mid-stitching. "You didn't like it when I bit you." It was as neutral an observation as she could hope to give, so hopefully he would fill in the rest.

"I didn't . . ." he blinked, finally looking up at her. "But I'm sorry that I freaked out. I was scared."

". . . yeah."

A brief pause followed.

Once it was clear he wasn't going to explain himself further, she said, "I think I don't understand something. Did you just not like me biting you?"

His eyes returned to staring at the wall.

"It hurt, and I don't like getting stitches, but that's not why I was scared."

She didn't ask anymore questions, and he didn't clarify while she finished up the stitches. She'd picked up the skill years ago, back when she was first exploring ways to manage her appetite for **blood**, but she had gotten a lot more practice since joining the League. While no one was particularly squeamish about **blood**, a lot of them couldn't stand to look at other injuries - severe bruising, compound fractures, third-degree burns, and the like. She'd seen it all before, and those that she didn't actively find fascinating were at worst unremarkable.

As she started washing her hands again, he finally spoke up again.

"You didn't ask if it was OK to **bite** me, and I didn't know what you were trying to do."

She gave him a curious look, and he continued; "Like, you could have been trying to hurt me for real, or trying to get my **blood** for some reason. And I didn't know if - if you wanted to . . ."

His stammering quickly gave way to inaudible mumbling. Try as she might to figure out the ending of that sentence, there were just too many options. Half a coherent sentence wasn't going to cut it this time.

"Wanted to . . .?" she prompted him.

He started scratching the back of his neck, that ever-present anxious tic. His refusal to look at her only made it more confusing.

"Y-you know," he said, his voice half an octave higher than normal. "D-do - do it."

She pondered that as she dried her hands. _'It?' Transform into him or something? What could he- _"

The penny dropped.** "Sex?*"**

He looked at her, shock and maybe horror written all over his face, and nodded.

"I mean, yeah! Obviously?"

_How was that not clear enough?! _

_I scaled a building because I was horny you moron! What was going on with _you? _! _

She flushed with humiliation, bringing her hands up to hide her face. She had been all over him for like 15 minutes and he hadn't gotten the message?! She knew he was hesitant with girls, but she didn't think he _literally _didn't know what was going on. Or had his mind just been somewhere else the whole time, and she hadn't noticed he wasn't into it? What was his crazy heart rate and deeper breathing if he wasn't turned on? Or did he think she was seducing him entirely for his own benefit, and his goodly nature had left him feeling too guilty to get into it?

He wasn't saying anything, which was making everything worse, so she let her hands slide down her face so she could look at him (he looked possibly as uncomfortable as she felt) and asked, "Did _you _. . . not . . . want to?"

"I don't . . . know? It was all a lot, and it was happening so quickly I . . ."

He took a deep breath and shook his head, as if trying to dispel the picture show that was probably playing in both their minds. "But I at least would have liked to be asked before doing something like that. Or being bitten. I can't _do _something like that without talking about it, at least. There's so much to consider when it comes to . . . well, either of those things."

_What. Like what. _

Probably reading how lost she was, he continued: "Like, biting. You feel the urge to **bite** people and drink their **blood**, right?"

"I mean, yeah." She pressed a finger to her lip, both in thought and as a cue. "It's kind of like **eating food** for other people, I think . . . but it's different with someone I like. It's a little like **kissing**, but different."

As he started thinking about that, she got to work bandaging his shoulder. She had kind of hoped that doing this would feel more like it was depicted in movies, where all the touching and vulnerability charges the air until all of their reserved passion broke through. But she barely felt connected to her body right now, and this whole conversation had her much more reflective than she'd anticipated.

Izuku said, "So, I mean, if you were to ask me, 'Would you let me **bite** you?' - on the surface, that's a trade-off. On one hand, it's painful and it would take some time to recover. On the other, it might be a really nice thing for you, and that - I don't know, _maybe _that could make it a nice thing for me, too?"

She paused what she was doing just to look at him. They just sat there maintaining eye contact while they both turned redder. She knew **vicarious pleasure** was a big thing for her, but she'd never heard someone say they'd like something just because _she _liked it. Was this something they had in common? If it was, it was something she absolutely had not expected, and she didn't really know how to take it.

Before she could get too ahead of herself, she asked, "Really?"

He nodded, and her heart skipped a beat. This was such a weird feeling. What _was _this feeling?

"But it's not that simple," he finally continued, dispersing the tension that had grown between them. "Your quirk would let you turn _into _me, and you could use it to hurt people. And if someone who knows who you are looks at the wound, they might know you bit me, and then they'd think either you attacked me, or I let you **bite** me. In either case, you or both of us could get into a lot of trouble, and I don't want that. So even if I decided I was okay with you biting me, I still might say 'no,' to protect us."

There was a lot to unpack there, and she had no idea where to start with unpacking it. Especially given that most of the well-constructed follow-up questions she'd come up with while he was talking flew right out of her head when he called them 'us.' She was used to that sort of language in the League, where 'us' was just a stand-in for the collective, for the mission, but this 'us' sounded much more like a . . .

_. . . like a _couple.

Her eyes darted around as she tried to ignore that particular incomprehensible thought and put together the gist of what he said.

"O . . . kay. I . . . that makes sense. You like to think stuff over."

"Thinking things through makes me feel **_safe. _**If I know what's going to happen, I can feel prepared - and _be _prepared."

_He needs to think things through before doing them, or else he gets anxious. Doing things for him just makes him more anxious because he didn't get to think about it. So that means . . . _

". . . so, you don't exactly want to or not want to have **sex**, or want or not want me to **bite** you . . . **you want me to ****_ask? _****So you can think about it first?**"

His face brightened for the first time in hours. "Yeah!"

His enthusiasm immediately made her feel lighter, and she finally got her smile back.

". . . although I don't think I'm really ready for . . . that," he mumbled, quietly enough she figured she wasn't supposed to hear.

Unexpectedly, he continued, "And I mean, if you just asked me about stuff, it's not like I'd say 'no' to everything. But if I _knew _you'd accept a 'no,' and you wouldn't do something like that when I said 'no,' I would feel a lot **safer**. I think I'd say 'yes' to more stuff if I knew I could say 'no' when I need to say 'no.'"

She finished wrapping his bandages, but she couldn't wrap her head around whatever he just said.

". . . I'm lost now," she mumbled.

He wasn't deterred - in fact, he only got more energetic.

"Like, um. Say, you asked if I wanted to kiss like - like that again, but I didn't want you to **bite** me. So I could say 'yes' to **kissing** without worrying you'd **bite** me. Or, if you wanted to **bite** me, but I didn't want you to turn _into _me, I could say 'yes' to the biting if I wasn't endangering other people. And if you listened to my 'no,' then I'd know I could trust you."

As unintuitive as it was, she could see the underlying logic. By controlling what was or was not off-limits, he could limit the unintended consequences of their actions. And if he needed to keep track of fewer potential consequences, he would be less anxious.

That was all well and good, but, ". . . this kind of feels like the _opposite _of trusting me."

It would be useful, sure. Showing restraint had always been a useful tool in her toolkit, but she'd grown tired of it and discarded it years ago. The idea that he could only feel **safe** around her if he could be totally sure what she was going to do felt constricting, and even though she was considering giving him that, it made her sad. Now that she had finally found people who accepted her unrestrained self in the League, the idea of regressing like this felt wrong. The people who trusted her now trusted her because her instincts were to help them, protect them, and act in their interests - because these were all things she sincerely wanted to do.

His face fell along with hers, but to her surprise, he had something to say in response.

"I . . . get that. This probably isn't what feels natural to you, and it doesn't feel entirely natural to me, either. But I do _want _to be able to trust you, Toga," he said, running his fingers over his bandages idly. "And I want to prove that you can trust me. But we've got to earn each other's trust, or we're just going to hurt each other."

_It's not just a conditional form of trust, then. It's a tool we can use to prove that we can be trusted? _

That was different. That was . . . better. And it wasn't just for him to use on her, either. He was trying to avoid hurting _her _, too.

She realized then that she wanted to know if she could trust him. It hadn't occurred to her that that was something she was even looking for. A confidant. How long had it been since she'd let anyone get that close?

_If Izuku is really okay with this, then he might be just the person I need. Just like . . . him. _

She asked, "Do you want to go get chicken nuggets?"

He just blinked a few times, stupefied.

"Uh, sure?"

* * *

**Toga, December 31, 12:05am**

"_ ~Chicken nugg-ets, chicken nugg-ets, nom~ _"

Horror dawned on his face.

"You eat them without sauce?!" he cried.

_What's the big deal? _

"Condamenss aw gross," she replied with her mouth full.

They were just leaving the nearest fast food place from Jin's apartment to start walking around aimlessly for a while. Izuku had to borrow a two-sizes-too-large shirt from Jin, which was both objectively hilarious and objectively adorable.

"Are they any . . . good like that?"

He picked out one of his chicken nuggets and plopped the whole thing into his mouth like she did, chewing thoughtfully.

"There's . . . nothing," he said. "There is literally no flavor."

Chicken nuggets were her favorite, and she wouldn't stand for that kind of slander.

"Hey now, flavor is a delicate combination of taste, smell, texture, and temperature. There is no _taste. _The flavor is great."

Just to emphasize her point, she grabbed another chicken nugget and "_ Nom _"'d it as dramatically as possible. He had nothing to say in response, so she turned her attention back to her chicken nuggets, eating a third one with a ' _nom.' _

This time, he laughed. "Do you say 'nom' every time?"

She tilted her head curiously. "Do I . . . what?"

"Say 'nom.' You've been saying 'nom' every time you eat a chicken nugget."

"What? No I don't."

To demonstrate, she picked out another chicken nugget and put it in her mouth without a word. "Schee?" she asked, even pointing to her mouth as she chewed.

"Fine, fine - my mistake," he said, returning to his own **food.**

Satisfied, she immediately grabbed another nugget and ate it with a '_ nom _.'

He immediately started laughing even harder than before.

_Why is he doing that?! _

"_ What?" _she demanded with disproportionate venom.

He didn't seem to notice the tone, and his smile didn't drop a bit, still giggling. "Sorry, sorry, it's just - it's such a moe girl thing."

She pouted, crossing her arms (and to-go bag) over her chest.

"I'm not used to people seeing me eat," she confessed.

That stopped his laughter, and his eyes turned sad even as he kept smiling. After a short pause, he said, "I guess you've been alone for a while, huh? I'm sorry - I just thought it was cute."

_He thinks I'm cute? _Boys telling her she was cute wasn't exactly new, but she was pretty sure _he _had never done so. Was he just talking about the _nom _thing, or did he think she looked cute, too? From what she could recall, he hadn't ever remarked on her appearance, even when she'd brought up the topic herself. How was he managing to make her blush like this when _he _was the clumsy virgin who didn't know how to talk to girls? That just wasn't fair!

Instead of engaging with that at all, she explained, "I . . . didn't like **eating** as a kid. So when I ate stuff I liked, I'd make little **games** of it. I guess I didn't realize I was still doing that stuff."

_My parents hated that. No wonder I kept it up. _

"Huh," he said.

"Huh?"

Half-stuck in his own thoughts, he said, "Oh, I was just thinking. Your quirk kinda _tells _you to drink **blood**. Maybe it also keeps you from enjoying **_other _****food**?"

_But I do like _some _**food**__, _she thought, polishing off the last of her chicken nuggets. _I guess that doesn't technically mean he's wrong, though. I can't be sure of how much other people enjoy __**food**__. _

"Maybe . . . I just thought I was a **picky eater**. It used to drive my parents crazy that I never wanted to eat anything but **'junk food.'** I'd throw fits and stuff about eating vegetables."

She winced. "I. Still don't really eat vegetables."

"Oh, maybe you're a **supertaster**?"

She blinked. "I'm a what?"

"**Supertaster.** Some people have extra taste buds and it makes them really sensitive to bitter** foods** \- like a lot of green vegetables and coffee."

"Huh." She held her chin between her finger and her thumb as she tried to play through her experiences of **food** to see if that matched up.

"Maybe," she said, "but I also hate the _texture _of like . . . most **food**. Not chicken nuggets, though. And I liked your mom's tonkatsu! My parents never wanted me eating fried **food**."

"Hmm," he hummed to himself, pondering. He sure did spend a lot of time doing that. The more time she spent with him, though, the less it bothered her. He had a lot to say, it just wasn't easy for him to find the words.

"So, what do you eat besides chicken nuggets?"

_Oh no. _

"Uhh. Hmm. Udon? I can't typically afford a lot of other stuff anyway."

It had been a lot easier before she joined the League, as she could always break into someone's apartment and hold them prisoner while she ate all of their **food**. Now that Kurogiri was out of the picture, she needed to remain on standby anytime the League might be up to something - and that meant _not _disappearing for a week-long binge.

His face went from thoughtful to anxious real quick. "Um, incidentally, how long have you been living off of udon and chicken nuggets?"

Now, _that _took some thinking. Udon she'd been having for basically her entire life, but chicken nuggets had been pretty restricted until she'd gotten her own money and friends to go out with. She'd stopped **eating** much else a little before running away, so, "I guess three years or so?"

And his anxious face got much worse. "How are you alive?!"

_I committed a lot of crimes, Izuku. _

She shrugged. "Dunno. I _did _start drinking juice so I wouldn't get scurvy, though. I hear that one's pretty nasty."

A long pause followed while Izuku searched for a spot to finish off the rest of his **food**. They were pretty far from Jin's apartment by now, at the edge of some community park - the kind that's just flat grass, a handful of trees, and a play structure shoved off to one side. Toga used to come to places like this often back in middle school, joking around and gossiping with her friends, doing her best to earn her freedom from home without cause for concern. The difference between then and now was that Izuku had a pretty good idea of who she was, and he wasn't running away. Some of her old friends had been kind enough to say they didn't think they should talk to her anymore when they found out. The rest simply never spoke to her again.

_Some 'friends.' _

Izuku pointed out a park bench near the play structure, and they settled down on opposite ends of it. They were pretty far from the nearest street, and there was no park-specific lighting, so he was probably going to have trouble eating.

It was surprising, really, that he'd come someplace dark and out of the way with her like this. It was such a **hook-up spot** \- which had been her favorite spots for** killing** people back when she was just getting started.

"So, I have another kind of personal question. Is that okay?"

She thought that over for a moment. "How about, for every question you get to ask, I get to ask _you _one, and you have to be honest?"

". . . um, okay. But then UA/Hero stuff is off the table."

"Okay, so is League stuff."

"Okay."

Even after asking, it took him a while to say anything. She wasn't sure if that was hesitation or he just genuinely asked if he 'could' ask her a question before coming up with one to ask.

"You said you don't normally . . . 'stick around' after biting someone. Did you mean you left them to die?"

_Ah. Figures. _

Her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "No. Usually they'd already be dead."

"So-"

"Nu-uh," she cut him off, glaring. "It's _my _turn now."

He conceded the point, and she jumped right in with: "Did you always want to be a hero?"

That one, at least, he didn't need to think about. "Yeah. For as long as I can remember. Probably longer."

_But he thought he was quirkless?! What was he thinking? _

She didn't get too much time to question it before he asked, "Did you start **killing** people so you could drink their **blood**?"

At the very least, he was asking yes/no questions. She could exploit that if she wanted, try and get more information per question by phrasing them differently, but she also felt like playing fair.

"Nope. Did you think you had a shot at being a hero, even without a quirk? Your mom said you didn't know what yours was when you were a kid."

She thought that would be a sore spot, and it appeared she was right - his face darkened, and his lips pressed into a thin line. It took him a moment to respond.

"I felt like I didn't have a choice but to try . . . but I knew my chances were almost nothing. I barely got in _with _my quirk. But I just couldn't give up on my dream."

_That's so stupid. _

Even as she told herself so, a warm feeling blossomed in her chest, **love** flaring out all over the surface of her body; _that's so cool. _

"Your turn," she said.

"Why -"

This time, it was clear he was hesitating, so she prompted him with an open-handed gesture. That helped.

"Why did you start **killing**?"

_So he went for the 'why' questions first, huh? He never really was one to play fair. _

She crossed her arms over her chest, frowning. _This could go . . . poorly. _

"Do you really want to know that? This isn't my question, by the way, I'm just asking."

He only nodded.

_He could totally freak out. There's no __**rule**__ saying he can't decide that I'm a __**freak**__ now. _

_But I _want _to trust him. Trust him just a little. _

_Please, Izuku. After everything else, don't hate me for this. _

"I wasn't planning to kill anyone when I started. When I was in middle school, and the urge to **bite** people got _bad. _I'd felt it all along, but it was like - like how people talk about teenage hormones? It was all I could think about. And my parents were already pretty fed up with me, so I didn't have much money, and I was getting so sick of trying to stomach whatever they fed us at school. I wanted money, and I wanted **blood**, and I found a great deal to get both. I got on paid dating websites, said I was 18, and I'd take **blood** \- theirs, or sometimes someone else's - as payment. Or at least a gift."

He looked plenty alarmed, but she hadn't answered his question yet. She had to keep talking - and not give him a chance to start picking at the details.

"At first, I just blackmailed them, saying I was, you know, 14 or whatever, and 'if you don't want that getting out, buy me things I want.' But I noticed pretty fast that they didn't really seem all that bothered that I was 14... and some people, you know, they already knew. They could tell. But either they were into that, or they just wanted to fuck a little shapeshifting **freak**, and who I was under the body they wanted me to wear didn't actually matter."

"Toga-

"-no, no, no talking. I haven't answered your question yet, let me finish."

His face was tense, maybe afraid, but he nodded and said nothing more.

"And I thought that was a pretty good deal, at first... I was getting what I wanted, and they were getting what they wanted. But, it started to feel so . . . _repulsive. _I hated them. And I realized the people coming to me weren't random people who thought **blood** was a better exchange than cash - they were pedophiles and lolicons, and blackmail just made it _expensive _for them, not wrong. So I **killed** them. And then I found more of them, and I **killed** them too. I hunted them like animals, Izuku, because that's what they **deserved**."

He couldn't look her in the eye. Of course he couldn't.

He said, "I'm . . . sorry, Toga. I'm so sorry."

She shook her head. "I'm not. I liked it. I liked it _so _much - nothing felt better than knowing they were going to die and I was going to keep living. And I made **games** out of it, too, like I did with my **food**."

It had been so different back then. **Killing** used to make her feel **safe**. She'd lost all sense of **safety** years ago, and now all that was left was the fun of it. The fun and the **blood**.

Izuku reached out towards her, but she flinched, and he stopped. What was that expression he had on his face? It didn't _look _like disgust. What was it?

"You're crying," he said.

"No I'm not."

She checked her face with her hand, and found tears on her face. But she wasn't crying. She wasn't. _I'm not. _

"It's my turn to ask you a question," she said, gritting her teeth, holding her voice steady.

He nodded.

"I'm not joking when I said I made **games** out of it. I'd test people, you know, tell them how old I was when they came to meet me, and offer them their money back. And the people who accepted - I can count them on one hand, four people in over a year! - I let them go. But the rest of them, I did whatever I wanted with them. Anything I could do to hurt them only made it more fun. And I made sure to have as much fun as I could, because otherwise I was just an exterminator, and I wanted to be a hunter."

"So, tell me, Deku: am I still **worth saving**? Do I still **deserve** peace?"

"Yeah."

There was no hesitation in his voice, and that pushed her too far - she started crying for real, and she hated it. As much as she wanted to hear that, even his validation curdled into poison inside her.

Even continuing to cry, she said, "I'm breaking the **rules** and asking you another question. You can figure out the penalty for that yourself, but you still have to answer me - okay?"

There was a pause while he thought it over, and she couldn't bear to look at him - or anything but her sweater sleeves, really.

"Okay," he said.

It took a moment to compose herself, but she refused to cry while asking this question. She wiped her face as clean as she could, hardened her expression, and said:

"You said you wanted to be the next Symbol of Peace, and that Peace should be for everyone, including me. Do the people I **killed** **deserve** peace, too? Were _they _**worth saving**?"

Of course, he didn't say anything immediately. She sat and watched as his eyes darted around, searching for answers in his own head. His lips moved silently, trying to work out the problem - and god, she hoped he could. She needed it.

Minutes ticked by, but she couldn't take her eyes off him. She wanted to believe he could do it. On one hand, the longer she gave him, the more possible it became he could figure it out. On the other, the longer he worked at it, the more certain she became of the conclusion she'd reached long ago - there was no answer, no solution. Just whatever she told herself.

Eventually, she asked, "Izuku?"

And that snapped him out of his trance. His eyes finally focused back on her.

He said, "I don't know."

She sighed, half out of relief, half out of frustration.

But he continued, "I want to believe everyone can be** saved**. I want to protect everyone."

Her fists clenched in frustration, and without meaning to, she started yelling: "You have to protect 'everyone' from _someone, _Deku! **Someone has to be the victim, and someone else has to be the perpetrator.** _That's _why you have anyone who needs protecting."

She brought the volume down as she placed her hand on her chest. "I became a villain because **I decided to be a perpetrator instead of a victim**. If I hadn't, I'd just be a **victim** forever."

He wouldn't quite look her in the eye.

"I don't have an answer for you," he said. Before she could say anything, he continued, "I just don't know - not yet. But I'll figure out an answer. I promise."

Slowly, she let the tension in her fists go, bringing her hands up to wipe away the remainder of her tears instead. She hated crying in front of people. She hated that this could still make her cry. But he hadn't disappointed her. He had been worth trusting - so far.

She nodded, and said, "Okay," softly.

Once she was sure her face was clear again, she said, "You . . . still have to punish me for breaking the **rules**." She avoided looking him in the eyes, hoping to catch him off-guard.

It worked - he winced and shifted uncomfortably.

"_ Please _don't phrase it like that."

She giggled into her sleeve, holding back her impulse to phrase it _so much worse. _But this was probably not the time to tease him within an inch of his life.

After a pause, he said, "Okay. So, I've got a penalty in mind, but you get to say 'no' if you don't want to do it. Deal?"

She glared. "You suck at punishments. But okay."

He scratched the back of his head. With the intensity between them dissipating, his normal hesitance was starting to return.

It wasn't all back, though. "How about you . . . hug me? And then, if you want, you can ask me more questions about being a kid, or something."

She gave him a pitying look, but she wasn't about to say 'no.' She scoot over the bench and threw her arms around him, pulling him closer until he was about ready to topple onto her. To her surprise, he wrapped his arms around her waist and squeezed her, butterflies filling her stomach as the air left her lungs.

Caught in the rush of it, she leaned close to his ear and whispered, "But later, you're going to have to be firmer with me, or I might take advantage of your weakness."

She couldn't see his face or much of his body holding him like this, but she didn't need to. His squirming was literal enough that she got to enjoy it just by touching him.

"W-w-with p-permission, right?"

_God, he's cute. God, he's dense. _

_And that didn't __**rule out**__ me taking advantage of him in the future . . . _

"Right," she purred.

She decided to de-escalate, more for her sake than his, and dropped the hug, scooting back a little bit.

"Speaking of permission for stuff," she said, tucking a tuft of hair behind her ear nervously, "could I . . . lay in your lap for a little while?"

Izuku checked his phone and said, "It's . . . the middle of the night, and it's cold. Don't you want to get home?"

She shook her head 'no.' "Please? I don't want to say good-night."

"Okay." He smiled softly. "Just let me throw away our trash, and then . . . yeah. For a little while."

He gathered their trash together while a thought swirled around and around in her head. As he started towards the nearest trash can, she said, "I** love** you so much."

It felt different, saying it this time. She wondered if he could hear it, whatever ephemeral quality she'd harnessed for just a second.

He half-turned to look at her, and his smile turned bright. "I know. Thank you, Himiko."

* * *

**January 31**

Izuku and Toga continued to text while he took the train home so he could make good on his promise to let her ask questions, on into the next day.

**Toga: **so wait, when did you realize you had a quirk?

**Izuku: **It's kind of a funny story? I got almost to the very end of my UA Entrance Exams, and I totally thought I was going to fail, b/c I couldn't fight the robots (we had to fight robots for the second portion of the exam - it was kind of wild.)  
**Izuku: **And, anyway, there was one robot we were supposed to avoid (it wasn't worth any points), but Ochaco kind of got caught in its way, and I got freaked out. So I kind of . . . 'jumped' towards it? But my quirk triggered for the first time, and I actually launched like 200' in the air or something? and totally broke my legs.  
**Izuku: **I just thought, super clearly, 'SMASH' like I'd seen All Might do so many times, and my punch became super strong, and I destroyed it (and then nearly fell to my death except that Ochaco** saved** me at the last second).  
**Izuku: **but yeah, that's how I figured out I had an enhancement quirk. I broke my arm and both of my legs and almost my neck.

**Toga: **omg! that's such a good meet-cute tho!  
**Toga: **you **saved** HER and then she **saved** YOU right afterwards  
**Toga: **why aren't you two married ;)

**Izuku: **it is SO weird that you send me a winky-face while suggesting I get with someone else.

**Toga: **That's because she's HOT and you should use some of that power to 'SMASH' her to thank her for falling for you.

**Izuku: **noooo don't say that and make it weird.

**Toga: **It's official. I'm naming your quirk.  
**Toga: **It's 'Smash,' and you developed it spontaneously upon seeing Ochaco.  
**Toga: **big same though

**Izuku: **=(

**Toga: **Q2: When did you fall for Ochaco, then, if not right then?

**Izuku: **idk

**Toga: **YOU DON'T KNOW WHEN YOU FELL FOR YOUR KINDA-GIRLFRIEND-NOT-GIRLFRIEND?

**Izuku: **idk? Like, I feel like it's kind of always been there, but it's just been growing inside me since then. And recently it's grown so big it kind of hurts.

**Toga:** **baby** that's beautiful :(  
**Toga: **plz smash her

**Izuku: **I'm not going to 'smash' anyone! That's such a gross way of talking about it.

**Toga: **This again? 'It?' Just call it **sex**, Izuku

**Izuku: **No  
**Izuku: **-_-  
**Izuku: **i refuse utterly

**Toga: **Q3: Can I have a picture of you as a kid?

**Izuku: **nope

**Toga: **damn.

**Izuku: **Good night, Himiko

**Toga: **Good night! I still prefer Toga! But I still **love** you!

**Toga: **Hey, uh, I'm declaring that the questions are still rolling, so Q4:  
**Toga: **Do you have any idea that you're actually like, well known on Stain fan sites and stuff? Like I totally knew who you were before we ever met  
**Toga: **I guess I just didn't notice how cute you were until I got a better look at you (▰˘◡˘▰)

**Izuku: **what.  
**Izuku: **Are you serious?  
**Izuku: **whyyy  
**Izuku: **I literally beat him up

**Toga: **Yeah, and it was like, really heroic and stuff.  
**Toga: **you like, know Stainy acknowledged you, right? as the 'real deal?'

**Izuku: **I do recall him saying something like that.  
**Izuku: **but I can't be sure - he was trying to /stab/ me at the time.

**Toga: **godiwishthatwereme . jpg

**Izuku: **so this is what they mean when they talk about depravity

**Toga: **(✿◠‿◠)  
**Toga: **don't worry, I'm (mostly) joking

**Toga: **crap  
**Toga: **I left my stuff at your place

**Toga: **can i come get it?

**Izuku: **I really think it's better if you avoid my and Ochaco's apartments for now, or people are going to start recognizing you. But I'm going to be taking the train on a long route in a couple of days - can I hand it off sneakily to you then?

**Toga: **that works!  
**Toga: **try not to get too **freaky** with Ochaco's clothes

**Izuku: **... what kind of stuff do you think I'm into, exactly?

**Toga: **I'm not going to know until you tell me ◕3◕

**Izuku: **yeah, uhhh, I'll get back to you on that.  
**Izuku: **but like don't hold your breath

**Toga: **but I'm kind of into that

* * *

**Izuku, December 31, 3:31pm**

_Oh my god, Toga. _

Since yesterday, **sex** had been on Izuku's mind constantly. He knew it was stupid that that was what he kept thinking about given everything else that happened with Toga, but now that he was out of that intense situation, he could not stop thinking about how close he'd come to having **sex** _with a girl. _And now that the floodgates had been opened, he was seeing **sex** everywhere - posters about consent, suggestive ads in his web browser, and so, so many PSAs and advertisements for condoms. He had filtered it out before, but now, against his own will, he was reading every line, trying to absorb all the knowledge he'd carefully avoided for so many years in as little time as possible.

And boy was that uncomfy.

"I can't wait to make a new **baby**!"

Mei's loud, overexcited voice yanked him away from Toga's texts, but only to dunk him into a fresh vat of humiliation as people turned to look at them on the subway. If she noticed, she certainly wasn't acknowledging it - her eyes were shining bright as she stared off into nowhere, probably already working on the project in her head.

"_ Please _don't say that in public!"

She turned to look at him, her perpetual half-grin threatening to turn full. "Oh, come on! This is real hero work - you've _gotta _be excited about it, too."

Even her looking straight at him was a bit too much, given how they'd sat right next to each other on the train. He scratched the back of his head, leaning away slightly while giggling nervously.

"Yeah - I guess I kinda am. Thank you so much for doing this with me, Hatsume. I know you've probably got other stuff going on during break."

She shook her head, her locks wonderfully bouncy. "Not at all! I mean, I've got so many projects, but nothing else this consequential or on this short a timeline. I work better under pressure."

From what he remembered of the cultural festival, that was _true _, but 'working better' in her case seemed to mostly mean 'overwork at the cost of everything else.'

"This doesn't need to be anything fancy, you know. In fact, it shouldn't be - it should be as simple as possible."

Despite the discouragement, she beamed. "Don't worry - this **baby** won't be going on the slideshow."

He tilted his head curiously. "Slideshow?"

She snorted. "Yeah! Power Loader has a slideshow he thinks I don't know about documenting all of the times I've accidentally re-invented guns. Or, at least, items functionally identical to guns in that they propel a small metal object at high speeds capable of tearing through a human body. My favorite was probably a backpack I made, **Sweet Baby 77**-"

Hatsume's ranting quickly settled into a pleasant hum for him. He could never keep up with her when she was talking about her inventions, but he couldn't pretend it wasn't _fun _to listen to her. Her passion was like nothing and no one else, and he was glad that they finally seemed to be becoming friends. She at least managed to remember his name now.

He sat back and gladly let her talk his ear off for the remainder of the afternoon.

* * *

**Toga, January 3, 11:10am**

**Izuku: **I'm getting off at the next stop. I'll leave your bag under my seat, and you can move to my seat when I get off without anyone noticing anything weird.

**Toga: **But then I won't get to **kiss** you :(

She had only just made her way into the same car as him a few minutes before the stop, and she'd sat as far away as she could while keeping her eyes on him. True to his word, though, he was on his feet as the train began to slow, and although she tried to chase after him, he was off before she could reach him.

She sat in his seat, grabbed her stuff from underneath it, pouted. She made a quick check of its contents - her clothes, her knife, her cherry blossom perfume, her new flip phone (with a phone charm duplicate of the one she'd made for Ochaco), and a few other miscellaneous items for being out and about - and found everything that she'd left in his room. From the look of it, he'd even folded her clothes and organized things - she definitely hadn't been making use of all the small pockets, after all.

**Toga: **no **kiss**? :( :(

**Izuku: **That wouldn't be very sneaky of you, would it?

**Toga:** (◕︵◕)

Even as she was pouting, though, she felt aglow. Izuku didn't **love** her - she knew that, and she had no expectation that would ever change. But he had _accepted _her **love**, and it had suffused every interaction they'd had since that night, when she'd laid in his lap in the freezing cold, and in his half-asleep stupor, he'd pet her hair ever so gently.

It was **a kind of love** she hadn't felt for a long time - and maybe, if she was being honest, it was **a kind of love** she'd never felt before. More and more, her desire to become him scraped against her desire to be with him, to **kiss** him again, to feel the warmth of his hand as they cuddled in bed together. It was a **game**, but one they were playing together.

Her heart was full of **contradictions**, but for now, she was content to let them remain side-by-side.

* * *

**Izuku, January 3, 11:30am**

Midoriya checked the new app he'd installed on his phone a little while later, watching the little blue dot follow the train line to the city's outskirts. Wherever she was going, Toga wasn't holed up too close to UA - or anywhere else she'd ever shown up for that matter. Without Kurogiri in the team, the League must have been pretty spread out. But they couldn't stay that way forever.

**Izuku: **Hey there Mei. I just wanted you to know that your **baby** is working perfectly.

**Mei: **It's not like I had any doubt! ‿‿◕ BUT YAY! **＼（＾○＾）人（＾○＾）／**  
**Mei: **GL to you and my **baby**! ⌒ヽ( ͡° ε ͡°) Try not to get stabbed. **o(╥﹏╥****)o**

**Izuku: **haha I'll try not to?  
**Izuku:** I'll owe you one

**Mei: **Oh you owe me several **( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) **But don't worry, I'm sure I can find a use for you sooner or later. (¬‿¬)

Those messages, and especially those emojis, were strictly in the department of _'Things I Can't Handle Right Now' _, so he stuck then in a filing cabinet somewhere in the dark recesses of his mind and left them there for now. Besides, he was probably totally mis-reading everything again, and she was only thinking of making new **babies**. Er. Inventions.

**Izuku: **Hey Uraraka. It looks like the plan is working - I'll keep notes for a few days and see if I can get something meaningful. Would you be willing to set up a meeting with Ryuko?

**Ochaco: **Got the info you were looking for?

**Izuku: **I'm getting it, yeah.

**Ochaco: **Alright.  
**Ochaco: **Thanks, Deku. ^^ You really come through when I need you.

**Izuku: **Aw, thanks.

He hoped that, if he kept acting like this was all according to plan, it would assuage the guilt building up inside of him.

It didn't.


End file.
